Funny Questions to Ask Kids About Their Parents
Twenty light questions to ask a child about their mom or dad, for a birthday video, a card or a car ride: how old they think their parent is, the phrase they hear most, the face they can imitate, and what their parent does when nobody is looking.
The questions
Open any question for the note
How old do you think your mom or dad is?
Why ask it
The classic opener because young children have no scale for adult ages and will guess anything from nineteen to a hundred with total confidence. Ask before they have a chance to look at anybody's face for a hint.
What's the first thing your mom or dad says every morning?
Why ask it
Children remember the exact wording of things repeated daily, and the answer is usually a line the parent has no idea they say. If the child does a voice with it, you have the best clip of the whole conversation.
What does your mom or dad say the most?
Why ask it
Expect an instruction rather than an endearment: put your shoes on, five more minutes, did you wash your hands. Parents are consistently surprised by which of their phrases became the household soundtrack.
What's your mom or dad's job? What do they do all day?
Why ask it
Children under about eight describe adult work in wonderfully wrong ways, usually built from one overheard word and a laptop. Older children get it roughly right, so this is best with the younger ones.
What's the funniest face your mom or dad makes? Can you do it?
Why ask it
The imitation is the answer, not the description, so hand it to them and wait. Kids are unnervingly accurate at this, and the parent watching will recognize the face long before anyone explains it.
What does your mom or dad sing along to in the car?
Why ask it
The car is where parents forget they have an audience, so children hear songs they connect with nobody else. If they can name a song and sing a line of it, expect the parent in the room to go slightly red.
What is your mom or dad really bad at?
Why ask it
Children answer this one with no diplomacy at all: parking, spelling, catching, staying awake in films. It works because they are not trying to be unkind, they are simply reporting. Let the parent take it in good humor.
What's your mom or dad's favorite food? What would they eat every day if they could?
Why ask it
Two answers, and the difference between them is where it gets funny. Children often name what the parent eats standing at the counter rather than anything the family sits down to, which is usually closer to the truth.
What does your mom or dad do when they think nobody is looking?
Why ask it
Kids see far more than adults assume: dancing while cooking, talking to the dog, eating the snacks that were being saved. Keep it playful and stop if the child heads somewhere private rather than silly.
What's the silliest thing your mom or dad has worn out of the house?
Why ask it
Children have a sharp and unforgiving eye for clothing, especially anything from before they were born. Photos usually appear within a minute of the answer, which is half the fun of asking.
What is your mom or dad scared of?
Why ask it
Answers land on spiders, heights, wasps and the vacuum. What matters is that the child has noticed a parent being afraid of something, which is often the first thing that made them realize adults are not invincible.
If your mom or dad had a superpower, which one would they have?
Why ask it
Listen for whether they pick a power the parent already seems to have: knowing where everything is, hearing through walls, appearing the second something breaks. Those answers are compliments in disguise.
What does your mom or dad do that embarrasses you in front of your friends?
Why ask it
Best with children over about eight, since younger kids are not embarrassed by their parents yet. Expect dancing, singing, waving too long at drop-off, or using slang incorrectly. Keep it to habits rather than anything appearance-related.
What always makes your mom or dad laugh, even when they're trying not to?
Why ask it
This requires the child to think about somebody else's inner life, which is a real step up from the earlier questions. Answers often name a sibling, a specific joke, or the child themselves doing something they know works.
What's a rule at your house that you think is ridiculous?
Why ask it
Children argue their case here in surprising detail, and the reasoning matters more than the rule. If the parent is listening, resist defending the rule on the spot. Let them make the argument all the way through.
What does your mom or dad always say they're going to do but never actually do?
Why ask it
Slightly pointed and usually accurate: the garage, the photo albums, the trip that keeps getting mentioned. Children track unfinished promises closely, so expect this to be the most quotable answer in the set.
If your mom or dad were an animal, which one would they be and why?
Why ask it
The animal is not the point, the reason is. A bear because he sleeps a lot, an owl because she is awake at night. Younger kids sometimes just name their favorite animal, so ask why and wait for the second answer.
What's something your mom or dad built, cooked or fixed? How did it turn out?
Why ask it
The second half is where the humor lives, because children report outcomes honestly. A collapsed cake or a wobbly shelf gets described exactly as it looked, with none of the softening an adult would add.
What do you think your mom or dad was like when they were your age?
Why ask it
Children build this out of stories they half remember plus their own imagination, so the picture is usually wrong in an interesting way. It also invites the parent to correct the record afterward, which is the best part.
What's the nicest thing your mom or dad does that they might not know you noticed?
Why ask it
The closer, and the one worth writing down. Children name small repeated things: a note in a lunchbox, sitting with them until they fall asleep, remembering how they like their toast. Ask this last, when they are relaxed and talking freely.
How to use these questions with children
Practical guidance for the conversation itself
Matching the questions to the age
- Children of three to five answer literally and briefly. Stick to what they can see and hear: the morning phrase, the funny face, the age guess.
- Six to nine is the best age range for the whole set. They understand a joke, they have opinions, and they have not yet learned to manage what they say.
- Ten and up need the questions asked with less of a performance around them. Skip the babyish ones and lean on the household rules, the embarrassing habits and the unfinished promises.
- Ask one question at a time and wait longer than feels comfortable. Children often start with a shrug and then produce the real answer eight seconds later.
Getting real answers
- Concrete beats abstract every time. What does your dad say in the morning gets an answer, what is your dad like does not.
- Do not correct them, even when they are wildly wrong about a job or an age. The wrong answer is the whole point and correcting it makes them cautious for the rest of the conversation.
- If a child is stuck, offer two options and let them choose. It restarts them without putting words in their mouth.
- Record it if you can, because the exact phrasing is what you will want later and nobody remembers it accurately an hour afterward.
Whether the parent should be in the room
- Kids give braver answers with the parent out of earshot, and warmer ones with the parent sitting there. Pick based on which you want.
- If the parent is present, ask them not to react or interrupt while the child is answering. One raised eyebrow and the honesty stops.
- For a birthday video or a card, ask without the parent and play it back to them. The surprise is most of the gift.
- Tell the child who will see the answers. They will edit themselves either way, so it is fairer to let them know first.
What to avoid
- Never ask a child to compare their parents or pick a favorite, and be careful with mom or dad phrasing in families where one parent is absent, separated or has died.
- Keep the teasing on habits and never on how a parent looks or how much they weigh. Children repeat what they hear, and they will repeat this to the parent later.
- Drop any question that reaches toward money, arguments between the adults, or anything the child seems to know they should not repeat.
- If a child looks uneasy, move on without comment and do not come back to it. There is no answer worth pressing for here.