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02 · Social & Fun

Good Questions to Ask Kindergarteners

Simple, concrete questions for kindergarten-age children: the best part of their day, what made them laugh, what they are proud of, and the imaginary things they like talking about. Written for parents, teachers and grandparents.

20 questions · each with a note on why · conversation guide

The questions

Open any question for the note

  1. What was the best part of your day today?

    Why ask it

    Narrower than "how was your day," which almost always gets "good." Naming one part gives a five-year-old something concrete to describe, and the part they pick is often not the one you would have guessed.

  2. If you could be any animal, which one would you choose and why?

    Why ask it

    The animal matters less than the reason. "A cheetah because it runs fast" and "a cat because it sleeps all day" are different answers about what sounds good to them right now.

  3. What is something that always makes you happy?

    Why ask it

    Children this age answer with objects and people rather than feelings, so what you get is a list of what they reach for when they need comforting.

  4. If you could have any superpower, what would you use it for?

    Why ask it

    Asking what they would use it for, rather than which one they want, gets past the list of powers from cartoons. Many children name a power that solves a problem they actually have.

  5. What is your favorite thing to do with your family?

    Why ask it

    Answers usually land on an ordinary routine rather than an outing. If a child picks pancakes on Saturday over a trip to the zoo, that is useful to know before you plan the next big day.

  6. If you could pick dinner tonight, what would it be?

    Why ask it

    Low-stakes practice at choosing and then defending a choice. Also a quiet check on whether they can name anything beyond what they ate yesterday.

  7. What is something you are really good at?

    Why ask it

    Kindergarteners answer literally: tying shoes, running fast, helping with the dog. If they cannot think of anything at all, note it rather than filling in an answer for them.

  8. If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?

    Why ask it

    Most will name a relative's house or somewhere from a film rather than a country, which tells you what "far away" currently means to them.

  9. What is your favorite book right now?

    Why ask it

    A child who names the same book every night is telling you which part they need to hear again. Asking which page is the useful follow-up.

  10. What do you want to be when you grow up?

    Why ask it

    Treat the answer as a description of what looks appealing, not a plan. Asking what that person does all day usually produces the more interesting half of the conversation.

  11. What made you laugh today?

    Why ask it

    Easier to retrieve than the events of the day because it is anchored to a feeling. Expect something physical: a fall, a silly word, a noise someone made.

  12. If you could have any pet, what would you pick?

    Why ask it

    The reason shows whether they want company, something to look after, or something impressive to tell other children about. Those are not the same wish.

  13. What is your favorite color, and why do you like it?

    Why ask it

    Sounds trivial, but the "why" is the stretch. Many children have never been asked to justify a preference and will invent a reason on the spot, which is fine and worth hearing.

  14. What is something new you learned today?

    Why ask it

    Saying a new fact out loud once more helps it stick, but expect "nothing" on plenty of days. Narrowing it helps: something new at lunch, or in the reading corner.

  15. If you made up a new game, how would someone win it?

    Why ask it

    Asking about winning forces the rules into the open. Children who can describe how the game ends are doing something more demanding than describing what it looks like.

  16. What is your favorite thing about school?

    Why ask it

    Answers are usually a person or a specific room, not a subject. "Nothing" repeated over several days is worth raising with the teacher rather than arguing about at home.

  17. Who could you help today, and how?

    Why ask it

    Keeps kindness concrete and in the present instead of abstract instructions to be nice. The person they name tells you who they have been noticing.

  18. What is something you want to learn how to do?

    Why ask it

    Gives you something you can actually set up: whistling, cutting with scissors, riding without training wheels. Answers here are easy to act on within a week.

  19. If you had a magic wand, what would you wish for?

    Why ask it

    Wishes tend to be either very small or very large with nothing in between, and both are informative: a lost toy returned, or a sick grandparent well again.

  20. What is something you did that made you proud of yourself?

    Why ask it

    Different from asking what they are good at. This one is about effort, so answers often involve something hard they finished rather than something easy they do well.

Talking with a five-year-old

Practical guidance for the conversation itself

What Helps

Ask While You Are Both Doing Something Else

Children this age answer more freely in the car, at the bath, or on a walk than seated across from an adult who is waiting. Steady eye contact plus a pause can read as a test.

Count to Ten Before You Rephrase

A five-year-old often needs several seconds to find an answer. Adults usually rephrase after two, which restarts the search and produces a shrug.

Ask About One Moment, Not the Whole Day

"How was school?" asks a child to summarize six hours, which they cannot do yet. "Who did you sit next to at lunch?" asks them to remember one moment, which they can.

When to Ask

  • The car ride straight after pickup is the worst window. Many children are hungry and out of words. Wait until after a snack.
  • Bedtime produces longer answers, partly because talking delays lights out. Let that work in your favor.
  • Two or three questions is a conversation. Six in a row is an interview, and children can tell the difference.
  • With siblings in the room, the older one will answer first every time. Ask each child on their own.

What Shuts It Down

Correcting the Grammar Mid-Story

Fixing "runned" while they are talking moves their attention from the story to the mistake. Use the correct form naturally in your own reply instead.

Improving on Their Answer

If the best part of the day was snack, resist adding "and the field trip." Children learn quickly to give the answer that got the warmer reaction.

Pushing After a No

A refusal is usually about the moment, not the topic. The same question often lands fine three hours later.

Follow-Ups That Get More

  • "And then what happened?"
  • "Who else was there?"
  • "Show me how you did it."
  • "Was that the funny part or the annoying part?" Two options is easier than an open question at this age.