20 Questions

Hypothetical Questions to Ask Parents

Thought-provoking hypothetical questions that help you understand your parents' perspectives, values, and experiences while creating meaningful conversations and deeper connections.

1

If you could go back in time and give your younger self one piece of advice, what would it be?

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Why this works

Reveals their wisdom and life lessons while showing what they've learned from their experiences and what they value most.

2

If you could have any job in the world, what would it be and why?

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Why this works

Shows their career aspirations and interests while revealing what kind of work or lifestyle they find most appealing or fulfilling.

3

If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?

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Why this works

Reveals their travel interests and lifestyle preferences while showing what kind of place or culture they find most appealing.

4

If you could have dinner with anyone living or dead, who would it be?

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Why this works

Shows their interests, values, and intellectual curiosity while revealing who they admire or find most fascinating.

5

If you could have any superpower, what would it be and why?

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Why this works

Fun and imaginative question that reveals their personality, values, and what they find most important or appealing.

6

If you could change one thing about your life, what would it be?

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Why this works

Reveals their regrets and aspirations while showing what they'd want to change about their past or present circumstances.

7

If you could be famous for anything, what would it be?

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Why this works

Shows their aspirations and interests while revealing what they value most and what they'd want to be known for.

8

If you could have any talent, what would it be?

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Why this works

Reveals their interests and aspirations while showing what skills or abilities they find most appealing or useful.

9

If you could go back in time and change one decision you made, what would it be?

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Why this works

Shows their regrets and reveals what decisions they'd want to change while helping you understand their life choices.

10

If you could have any pet, what would it be and why?

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Why this works

Fun and personal question that reveals their preferences and shows what kind of companionship or characteristics they value.

11

If you could be any age again, what age would you be and why?

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Why this works

Reveals their favorite life stage and shows what period of their life they found most enjoyable or meaningful.

12

If you could have any car, what would it be and why?

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Why this works

Shows their preferences and interests while revealing what kind of vehicle or lifestyle they find most appealing.

13

If you could have any hobby, what would it be and why?

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Why this works

Reveals their interests and aspirations while showing what kind of activities or pastimes they find most appealing or fulfilling.

14

If you could have any house, what would it be like and why?

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Why this works

Shows their lifestyle preferences and reveals what kind of home or living situation they find most appealing or comfortable.

15

If you could have any vacation, what would it be and why?

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Why this works

Reveals their travel interests and shows what kind of experiences or destinations they find most appealing or relaxing.

16

If you could have any skill, what would it be and why?

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Why this works

Shows their interests and aspirations while revealing what abilities or knowledge they find most appealing or useful.

17

If you could have any friend, who would it be and why?

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Why this works

Reveals their social preferences and shows what kind of relationships or companionship they value most.

18

If you could have any memory, what would it be and why?

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Why this works

Shows their favorite experiences and reveals what moments or memories they find most meaningful or enjoyable.

19

If you could have any achievement, what would it be and why?

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Why this works

Reveals their aspirations and shows what accomplishments or recognition they find most meaningful or desirable.

20

If you could have any experience, what would it be and why?

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Why this works

Shows their interests and aspirations while revealing what kind of experiences or adventures they find most appealing or fulfilling.

Best Practices for Parent Conversations

Expert tips and techniques for getting the most out of these questions.

Best Practices

Show Genuine Interest in Their Perspectives

Demonstrate authentic curiosity about their thoughts and experiences. Ask follow-up questions and show enthusiasm for their insights and wisdom.

Be Patient and Respectful

Give them time to think and share their thoughts. Be respectful of their perspectives and experiences, even if they differ from your own.

Create a Safe and Supportive Environment

Ensure they feel comfortable sharing their thoughts and experiences. Be supportive and non-judgmental when they share personal information.

Question Sequences

The Wisdom and Life Lessons Sequence

1
If you could go back in time and give your younger self one piece of advice, what would it be?
2
If you could change one thing about your life, what would it be?
3
If you could go back in time and change one decision you made, what would it be?
4
If you could be any age again, what age would you be and why?

The Aspirations and Interests Sequence

1
If you could have any job in the world, what would it be?
2
If you could be famous for anything, what would it be?
3
If you could have any talent, what would it be?
4
If you could have any skill, what would it be?

Common Pitfalls

Don't Judge or Criticize Their Choices

Avoid judging their hypothetical choices or experiences. Be respectful of their perspectives and show genuine interest in their thoughts.

Don't Make Assumptions About Their Preferences

Don't assume you know what they'd choose. Ask open-ended questions and let them share their thoughts and preferences.

Don't Ignore Their Life Experience

Acknowledge their life experience and wisdom. Show appreciation for their insights and perspectives, even if they differ from your own.

Conversation Templates

The Wisdom and Life Lessons Approach

1
Step 1: Start with: "I want to learn from your experience..."
2
Step 2: Ask: "If you could go back in time and give your younger self one piece of advice, what would it be?"
3
Step 3: Explore: "If you could change one thing about your life, what would it be?"
4
Step 4: Connect: "If you could go back in time and change one decision you made, what would it be?"

The Aspirations and Interests Approach

1
Step 1: Begin with: "I'm curious about your interests and aspirations..."
2
Step 2: Ask: "If you could have any job in the world, what would it be?"
3
Step 3: Explore: "If you could be famous for anything, what would it be?"
4
Step 4: Connect: "If you could have any talent, what would it be?"

Further Reading

"The Art of Conversation" by Catherine Blyth
"How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie
"The Friendship Factor" by Alan Loy McGinnis
"The Art of Friendship" by William Rawlins

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