20 Questions

Questions to Ask a Reference for a Nanny

Essential questions to ask when checking references for a potential nanny, helping you make an informed decision about who will care for your children.

1

How long did the nanny work for your family?

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Why this works

Establishes the duration of their employment and helps you understand the length of their experience with the reference family.

2

What were the ages of your children when the nanny worked for you?

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Why this works

Reveals their experience with specific age groups and helps you assess if they're a good fit for your children's ages.

3

What were the nanny's main responsibilities in your home?

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Why this works

Clarifies the scope of their duties and helps you understand what tasks they're comfortable handling.

4

How did the nanny handle discipline and behavior management?

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Why this works

Reveals their approach to child discipline and helps you assess if their methods align with your parenting philosophy.

5

What was the nanny's relationship like with your children?

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Why this works

Shows how well they connected with the children and whether they were able to build positive, trusting relationships.

6

How did the nanny communicate with you about your children?

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Why this works

Reveals their communication style and whether they kept you informed about your children's activities, concerns, and development.

7

What were the nanny's strengths in caring for your children?

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Why this works

Identifies their positive qualities and helps you understand what they excel at in childcare.

8

Were there any areas where the nanny could have improved?

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Why this works

Provides honest feedback about areas for growth and helps you understand any limitations or challenges they faced.

9

How did the nanny handle emergencies or unexpected situations?

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Why this works

Reveals their ability to stay calm and make good decisions under pressure, which is crucial for childcare safety.

10

What was the nanny's approach to meal preparation and feeding?

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Why this works

Shows their comfort level with food-related tasks and helps you understand their approach to nutrition and meal times.

11

How did the nanny handle your children's schedules and routines?

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Why this works

Reveals their organizational skills and ability to maintain consistency, which is important for children's well-being.

12

What was the nanny's approach to play and learning activities?

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Why this works

Shows their creativity and engagement with children while revealing their philosophy on play and development.

13

How did the nanny handle conflicts between siblings or children?

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Why this works

Reveals their conflict resolution skills and ability to manage multiple children effectively.

14

What was the nanny's reliability and punctuality like?

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Why this works

Shows their dependability and commitment to their job, which is crucial for your family's schedule and peace of mind.

15

How did the nanny handle your children's emotional needs?

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Why this works

Reveals their emotional intelligence and ability to provide comfort and support during difficult moments.

16

What was the nanny's approach to screen time and technology?

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Why this works

Shows their philosophy on technology use and helps you assess if it aligns with your family's values and rules.

17

How did the nanny handle your children's homework and school-related tasks?

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Why this works

Reveals their ability to support academic activities and helps you understand their approach to educational support.

18

What was the nanny's relationship like with other family members?

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Why this works

Shows their ability to work well with extended family and helps you understand their interpersonal skills.

19

Would you hire this nanny again if you needed childcare?

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Why this works

Provides a direct assessment of their overall performance and helps you understand the reference's level of satisfaction.

20

What advice would you give to a family considering hiring this nanny?

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Why this works

Provides valuable insights and recommendations while helping you understand what to expect and how to work effectively with them.

Best Practices for Checking Nanny References

Expert tips and techniques for getting the most out of these questions.

Best Practices

Ask Open-Ended Questions

Use questions that encourage detailed responses rather than yes/no answers. This provides more valuable information about the nanny's performance.

Listen for Red Flags

Pay attention to hesitation, vague responses, or reluctance to provide specific examples. These can indicate potential problems.

Verify Information

Cross-reference information from multiple references and ask for specific examples to ensure consistency and accuracy.

Question Sequences

The Experience Assessment

1
How long did the nanny work for your family?
2
What were the ages of your children when the nanny worked for you?
3
What were the nanny's main responsibilities in your home?
4
What were the nanny's strengths in caring for your children?

The Performance Evaluation

1
How did the nanny handle discipline and behavior management?
2
What was the nanny's relationship like with your children?
3
How did the nanny communicate with you about your children?
4
Were there any areas where the nanny could have improved?

Common Pitfalls

Don't Skip Reference Checks

Always check references thoroughly. Skipping this step can lead to hiring someone who isn't a good fit for your family.

Avoid Leading Questions

Don't ask questions that suggest the answer you want to hear. Let the reference provide honest, unbiased feedback.

Don't Ignore Red Flags

If a reference seems hesitant or provides vague answers, dig deeper or consider it a warning sign about the nanny's performance.

Reference Check Templates

The Comprehensive Assessment

1
Step 1: Start with: "How long did the nanny work for your family?"
2
Step 2: Explore: "What were the nanny's main responsibilities?"
3
Step 3: Assess: "What were the nanny's strengths in caring for your children?"
4
Step 4: Evaluate: "Were there any areas where the nanny could have improved?"

The Relationship Focus

1
Step 1: Begin with: "What was the nanny's relationship like with your children?"
2
Step 2: Probe with: "How did the nanny handle discipline and behavior management?"
3
Step 3: Clarify with: "How did the nanny communicate with you about your children?"

Further Reading

"The Nanny Book" by Susan Carlton
"Hiring a Nanny" by Nolo Press
"The Complete Guide to Hiring a Nanny" by Michelle LaRowe

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