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03 · Professional & Academic

Questions to Ask a School Psychologist

Questions for a parent or carer meeting the school psychologist about their child, covering why a referral was made, what an assessment involves, who sees the report, what support follows and what to do if you disagree. Plain questions for a meeting that is often short.

20 questions · each with a note on why · conversation guide

The questions

Open any question for the note

  1. What led to my child being referred to you, and who made the referral?

    Why ask it

    Start here because parents are often told a referral has happened without being told what prompted it. A specific answer names an observation, a piece of work or an incident, and that detail is what you can compare against what you see at home.

  2. What will the assessment look at, and what will it not cover?

    Why ask it

    Assessments have boundaries. One looking at reading and processing will not tell you about anxiety, and if your main concern is not on the list, this is the moment to say so rather than after the report is written.

  3. What does this involve for my child: how many sessions, how long, and where?

    Why ask it

    Practical detail you will need to plan around, and it also lets you prepare your child honestly. Sessions spread over several weeks are normal, and knowing that in advance prevents the impression that something is wrong that has to be fixed urgently.

  4. Will my child miss class, and how will that be explained to them and to classmates?

    Why ask it

    Being collected from a lesson is the part children notice. Ask what words will be used, because a plain explanation given in advance avoids the child inventing a worse one.

  5. Which assessments or tools are you planning to use, and what do they actually measure?

    Why ask it

    You are entitled to know. The answer also tells you the limits of the conclusions: a screening tool suggests where to look next, a full cognitive assessment supports a formal decision, and they are often discussed as though they were the same thing.

  6. When will the report be ready, and will we go through it together before anything is decided?

    Why ask it

    Reading a report cold, with unfamiliar scores and percentiles, is the most common cause of unnecessary alarm. Ask for a meeting to walk through it, and ask for it in writing beforehand if you would rather read it slowly.

  7. Who else will see this report, and what becomes part of my child's school record?

    Why ask it

    Practice varies between schools and systems. Ask which parts follow the child to their next school, what teachers see, and what is kept in a separate file, then ask where the written policy on that is.

  8. If the results are close to a threshold, how is the decision made and who makes it?

    Why ask it

    Borderline results are common and the decision is rarely the psychologist's alone. Knowing whether it goes to a team, and who sits on that team, tells you where to direct any concerns you have.

  9. If my child does not qualify for formal support, what happens next?

    Why ask it

    Not qualifying does not mean the difficulty was imagined, but it can feel that way. Ask what informal support remains available, and how the situation would be reviewed if things get worse.

  10. What could be put in place now, without waiting for a formal plan?

    Why ask it

    Seating changes, extra time, a check-in with a named adult and reduced copying from the board usually need no paperwork. Many families wait months for a process while these go unasked for.

  11. How will we know whether the support is helping, and when do we look at it again?

    Why ask it

    Ask for a specific measure and a date. Without both, support tends to be introduced and then quietly persist unchanged for a year, whether or not it made any difference.

  12. What would be useful for me to bring or tell you?

    Why ask it

    Sleep patterns, what homework looks like at the kitchen table, medical history, changes at home. Psychologists see one setting, and the home picture often reframes a school observation entirely.

  13. How many days a week are you at this school, and how many students are on your caseload?

    Why ask it

    This is the honest answer to how quickly things will move. A psychologist covering several schools on one day a week each cannot check in weekly, and it is better to know that than to wait for calls that were never possible.

  14. Do you provide counselling yourself, and if so how often and for how long?

    Why ask it

    Roles differ widely: some psychologists mainly assess, others see students regularly. Ask whether any counselling is time-limited to a set number of sessions, because that shapes what to expect at the end of them.

  15. If my child needs more than the school can offer, how does a referral outside work?

    Why ask it

    Ask who makes the referral, what the wait tends to be, and what the school does in the meantime. Families often assume the school will manage this and later find they were expected to arrange it themselves.

  16. What do you share with teachers, and what do you keep between you and my child?

    Why ask it

    Teachers usually need strategies rather than details, and a psychologist who has thought about this will describe that distinction clearly. Vague answers here are worth pressing on, because the trust of an older child depends on it.

  17. If my child tells you something that worries you, what are you required to do?

    Why ask it

    There are limits to confidentiality, particularly around safety, and it is better to hear them plainly now. It also tells you what your child will have been told at the start of their own session.

  18. How will you explain your role to my child?

    Why ask it

    The wording matters at any age. Look for something concrete and undramatic about finding out how they learn best, rather than language about problems, which children carry longer than adults expect.

  19. What should I do if I disagree with your conclusions?

    Why ask it

    There is normally a written process for raising a concern or requesting an independent opinion, and it differs by school system. Ask for the name of that process and who to contact, in writing if you can.

  20. Can you walk me through the timeline from today?

    Why ask it

    Close with this. A step-by-step sequence with rough dates gives you something to hold, and it makes clear which steps depend on you returning a form or signing consent, which is where these processes most often stall.

Preparing for the meeting

Practical guidance for the conversation itself

Before you meet

Write down what you have actually observed

Dates, what happened, how long it lasted. Two weeks of short notes on homework, sleep and mood is more useful to a psychologist than a general description of a difficult year, and it is easy to forget the specifics in the room.

Bring the paperwork you already have

Previous reports, letters from other professionals, hearing and vision checks, samples of schoolwork. Assessments sometimes repeat what has already been established because nobody knew the earlier document existed.

Ask for the meeting to be longer if you need it

These appointments are often scheduled for twenty or thirty minutes. If you have several questions, say so when the meeting is arranged rather than running out of time at the end.

Bring someone with you

A second person to take notes helps, particularly for a report meeting where scores and terms come quickly. You can also ask, in advance, whether the meeting may be recorded.

Ask for plain wording when you hear

  • Percentile: ask what it means in practice for a child in this class.
  • Standard score or scaled score: ask what range is considered typical and where your child sits.
  • Working memory, processing speed, executive function: ask for an example from a school day.
  • Screening as opposed to a full assessment: ask which this was and what it can conclude.
  • Discrepancy or eligibility criteria: ask who applies them and whether there is any discretion.
  • Intervention or tier: ask what will actually happen, who will do it, and how often.

After the meeting

Send a short written summary

A few lines confirming what was agreed, who is doing what and by when. This is not a formality. It creates a record that survives staff changes and it often surfaces a misunderstanding while it is still easy to correct.

Set your own review date

If no date was agreed, pick one about six weeks out and put it in the calendar. Contact the school then whether or not anything has changed.

Keep everything in one place

Reports, emails, notes and forms in a single folder. If the situation continues over years or you move schools, this file becomes the only continuous account of what was tried and what happened.

Where these conversations go wrong

Treating a score as a verdict

A single number describes performance on one task on one day. Ask what else supports the conclusion, and whether anything in the results was inconsistent.

Waiting for a formal plan before asking for anything

Processes take months. Practical adjustments in the classroom can usually start within a week if someone asks for them.

Assuming a referral means the school has stopped worrying

A referral is a request, not a resolution. Check in with the class teacher separately, because they see your child daily and the psychologist may not.

Leaving your child out of it entirely

Older children in particular notice being discussed. Tell them what is happening in plain terms and ask what they would want the school to know.