20 Questions

Questions to Ask About Change

Thoughtful questions that help navigate change, understand perspectives, and build support during transitions in life, work, or relationships.

1

What's the most significant change you've experienced recently?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Opens conversation about current transitions and shows genuine interest in their life circumstances.

2

How do you typically handle unexpected changes in your life?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Reveals their coping mechanisms and resilience strategies, providing insight into their adaptability.

3

What change are you most excited about right now?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Focuses on positive aspects of change and helps identify opportunities and growth areas.

4

What's the hardest part about change for you?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Identifies specific challenges they face with transitions, allowing for targeted support and understanding.

5

How do you prepare yourself for major life changes?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Extracts practical strategies for managing transitions and reveals their planning and preparation approach.

6

What change would you make in your life if you had the courage?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Uncovers desires and aspirations they may be hesitant to pursue, revealing potential areas for growth.

7

How has change shaped who you are today?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Explores the impact of past transitions on their identity and personal development.

8

What change are you most afraid of?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Identifies fears and concerns about potential transitions, helping understand their comfort zones and boundaries.

9

How do you support others going through change?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Reveals their empathy and support strategies, showing how they help others navigate transitions.

10

What change do you wish you had made sooner?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Extracts lessons learned from delayed decisions and provides insight into their decision-making process.

11

How do you know when it's time for a change?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Reveals their decision-making criteria and intuition about timing for life transitions.

12

What change has surprised you the most?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Explores unexpected outcomes and helps understand how they process unforeseen developments.

13

How do you maintain stability during times of change?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Identifies their grounding mechanisms and strategies for maintaining equilibrium during transitions.

14

What change would you never want to make?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Reveals their core values and non-negotiables, showing what they consider essential to their identity.

15

How do you communicate about change with the people in your life?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Shows their approach to sharing transitions with others and managing relationships during change.

16

What change has taught you the most about yourself?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Extracts self-discovery insights and reveals how they learn and grow from transitions.

17

How do you deal with resistance to change from others?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Reveals their conflict resolution skills and approach to managing pushback during transitions.

18

What change are you currently considering?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Gets current information about their decision-making process and potential future transitions.

19

How do you celebrate successful changes in your life?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Shows their approach to acknowledging achievements and positive outcomes from transitions.

20

What advice would you give someone facing a major change?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Extracts their wisdom and experience with transitions, providing valuable guidance for others.

Best Practices for Discussing Change

Expert tips and techniques for getting the most out of these questions.

Best Practices

Listen Without Judgment

Create a safe space for sharing by avoiding criticism or unsolicited advice. Focus on understanding their perspective first.

Ask Open-Ended Questions

Use questions that invite detailed responses rather than yes/no answers. This encourages deeper sharing and reflection.

Validate Their Experience

Acknowledge that change is difficult and their feelings are valid. This builds trust and encourages continued sharing.

Question Sequences

The Change Explorer Sequence

1
What's the most significant change you've experienced recently?
2
How has that change affected you?
3
What did you learn about yourself through that experience?
4
How has it shaped your approach to future changes?

The Support Seeker Sequence

1
What change are you currently considering?
2
What's making you hesitate about it?
3
How can I best support you through this?
4
What would help you feel more confident about moving forward?

Common Pitfalls

Don't Minimize Their Concerns

Avoid saying things like 'it's not that bad' or 'you'll get over it.' Change is personal and their feelings are valid.

Avoid Giving Unsolicited Advice

Unless they specifically ask for advice, focus on listening and understanding rather than problem-solving.

Don't Compare Their Change to Others

Each person's experience with change is unique. Avoid saying 'others have it worse' or comparing their situation to yours.

Conversation Templates

The Empathetic Listener

1
Step 1: Start with: "What's the most significant change you've experienced recently?"
2
Step 2: Follow with: "How has that been for you?"
3
Step 3: Support with: "That sounds really challenging. How are you coping with it?"

The Future Planner

1
Step 1: Begin with: "What change are you considering?"
2
Step 2: Explore: "What's exciting about that possibility?"
3
Step 3: Support with: "How can I help you think through this decision?"

Further Reading

"Transitions" by William Bridges
"Who Moved My Cheese?" by Spencer Johnson
"The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle

Find Your Perfect Questions

Search our collection of thoughtful questions for any conversation or situation