Questions to Ask About Homeschooling
Questions for families considering homeschooling, to put to experienced homeschooling parents, a local group, or your state education office. Covers filing requirements, real costs, the daily load, and what happens if it does not work.
The questions
Open any question for the note
What does my state actually require: notification, testing, a portfolio, or nothing at all?
Why ask it
Requirements differ enormously between states, from a single letter to annual assessment. Get the answer from the statute or your state's homeschool organisation rather than from a national blog post.
Who do I file with, and by what date?
Why ask it
The office and the deadline are the two facts most easily got wrong, and a missed filing date is the most common avoidable problem. Ask what confirmation you should receive and keep it.
Which of these requirements are actually law, and which are just what our district prefers?
Why ask it
Districts sometimes request more than the law obliges, such as extra meetings or curriculum approval. Knowing the difference lets you comply politely without agreeing to more than you must.
What records would I need if we moved states, or if my child went back to school?
Why ask it
Attendance logs, work samples, and course descriptions are far easier to keep as you go than to reconstruct. Ask what a receiving school asked of someone who actually made that transition.
How many hours a day does this really take, for the child and for you?
Why ask it
The teaching hours are usually fewer than people expect and the planning, admin, and driving are more. Ask separately about your hours, because that is the number that determines whether it is sustainable.
What did your first year look like, and what would you do differently?
Why ask it
Experienced parents almost always name the same regrets: buying too much, over-scheduling, and trying to recreate a school day at home. Cheaper to hear it now than to learn it in November.
What did you spend in your first year, and on what?
Why ask it
Curriculum, testing fees, co-op dues, activities, and materials add up, and one parent's reduced income is often the largest cost of all. Ask for a rough total, then ask what was wasted.
Which curriculum did you give up on, and why?
Why ask it
Abandoned programs teach more than recommended ones, because the reason for the failure is usually about the family rather than the materials. Look for whether it was too rigid, too loose, or too parent-intensive.
What do you do about subjects you cannot teach?
Why ask it
Higher maths, sciences with labs, and languages are the usual walls. Real answers involve online classes, a tutor, a community college course, or a swap with another parent, and each has a cost.
Where do your children see other children, and how often?
Why ask it
Ask for the weekly schedule rather than a reassurance about socialisation. Regular unstructured time with the same group is different from a monthly outing, particularly for teenagers.
What does a co-op cost, what does it require of parents, and is it any good?
Why ask it
Many co-ops expect you to teach, supervise, or commit to a statement of faith. Worth knowing all three before it becomes the centre of your week.
Can my child take part in sports, band, or individual classes at the local school?
Why ask it
Access varies by state and sometimes by district, and it is often the deciding factor for a child who wants a team. Ask a family who has actually done it in your district.
How do you know if a child is falling behind, and behind whom?
Why ask it
Without a class to compare against, gaps can go unnoticed for a long time, particularly in maths. Look for a concrete check: periodic testing, an outside tutor, or a curriculum with built-in assessment.
What do you do on the days it falls apart?
Why ask it
Every homeschooling family has these, and the honest answers are practical: stop, go outside, switch subjects, take the week off. Someone who says it never happens is not describing their year accurately.
How do you get any time to yourself?
Why ask it
This is the question that predicts whether a family lasts more than two years. If the answer is that they do not, ask what they have tried and what changed.
What did you do for a child with dyslexia, ADHD, or an existing IEP?
Why ask it
Leaving public school can mean leaving services behind, and what remains available varies by state. Ask about evaluations, therapy costs, and whether the district still provides anything.
How does this work if both parents work, or if there is only one parent?
Why ask it
It is done, but usually with a specific structure: shift work, online classes, a hired tutor, grandparents, or a part-time enrolment. Ask for the actual weekly arrangement rather than encouragement.
What did transcripts and college applications involve for you?
Why ask it
Someone two years past it can tell you what documentation was needed, which tests mattered, and whether the local community college route helped. Second-hand reassurance is much less useful than one completed example.
How do you handle the relative who thinks this is a mistake?
Why ask it
Family disapproval is a real and draining part of the first year. Useful answers are about limiting the conversation rather than winning it.
What would make you put them back in school?
Why ask it
Asked of yourself as much as anyone else. Deciding the conditions in advance turns a possible future decision into a plan rather than a defeat.
Deciding and Getting Started
Practical guidance for the conversation itself
Verify the legal position first
- 1Find your state's actual statute or department of education page and read the homeschooling section yourself, rather than relying on a summary.
- 2Note four things: who you notify, by when, what you must record, and whether any assessment is required.
- 3Contact your state or local homeschool organisation to ask how your particular district behaves in practice, which is often the missing piece.
- 4Keep copies of every filing and any confirmation you receive, in one folder, from the first day.
- 5Recheck the requirements each year, since both statutes and district practice change.
Practical advice for a first year
Buy less than you think you need
Most families overspend in the first month on complete boxed programs and then abandon parts of them. Start with maths and reading, borrow or trial the rest, and buy again in January when you know your child better.
Plan for fewer hours than a school day
One-to-one teaching covers ground faster than a class, and trying to fill six hours produces resentment on both sides. Set a shorter day and use the remaining time for reading, projects, and getting out of the house.
Fix the social schedule before the academic one
Regular contact with other children is harder to arrange than curriculum and matters more to how the year feels. Put the weekly commitments in the calendar first and build lessons around them.
Decide now how you will check progress
Choose one external reference point, whether an annual test, a tutor, or a standardised curriculum, so that a gap is noticed in months rather than years. Maths is where this matters most.
Who is worth asking
- Families two or three years in, who remember the beginning but are past the evangelical phase.
- Families who stopped homeschooling, who will tell you what made it unworkable. They are the most useful and least consulted group.
- Your state or local organisation, for how the law is applied in your district rather than how it reads.
- A parent of a child the same age as yours, since managing a six-year-old and a fifteen-year-old have almost nothing in common.
- Someone whose child has a similar learning difference, if that applies, because the practical answers are specific to it.