Questions to Ask as a Babysitter
Twenty questions for a babysitter to ask the parents, ordered so the ones that matter if something goes wrong come before the ones about routine. Useful on a first booking and worth a quick run through on any evening with a new arrangement.
The questions
Open any question for the note
What time do you expect to be back, and what number reaches you if the first one does not?
Why ask it
Two numbers, not one. Phones lose signal in restaurants and cinemas, and a second contact for the same parent solves most of the evening's worry. Also fixes your own end time before it becomes an awkward conversation later.
If I cannot reach either of you, who should I call, and are they close by?
Why ask it
Ask for a name and a relationship, not just a number, so you can tell a child who is coming. Someone ten minutes away is worth far more than a relative in another city, and parents often have not thought about the distance.
Where can I find your address, your doctor's details, and any medical information written down?
Why ask it
In an emergency call you will be asked for the address, and it is surprisingly easy to forget which house you are in. Having it on paper on the fridge means you are not searching a phone while holding a crying child.
Are there any allergies, conditions, or medications I should know about?
Why ask it
Ask even if you have sat before, since prescriptions and diagnoses change. Follow up on where anything urgent is kept, whether it is in date, and whether the child knows how to use it themselves.
If they need medicine while I am here, what is the dose, when is it due, and who has already given some today?
Why ask it
Double dosing usually happens because two adults each assumed the other had not. Get the time of the last dose, not just the schedule, and write down what you give and when.
Is there anything they must not eat, and what should I do if they eat it by accident?
Why ask it
Restriction and reaction are separate pieces of information. A sitter who knows the food but not the response plan is not prepared. Ask what the early signs look like and at what point you would call rather than wait.
What are they eating tonight, and when?
Why ask it
Practical and easy, and it settles the evening's biggest negotiation before the parents leave. Ask what is genuinely fine and what would count as a treat, so you are not deciding under pressure from a seven-year-old.
Can you talk me through bedtime, step by step, including what time lights go out?
Why ask it
Ask for the sequence rather than the time. Bath, teeth, two books, a specific toy, a particular door position, and a landing light are the details children insist on, and getting them right is the difference between a calm night and an hour of resistance.
If one of them wakes up in the night, what do you normally do?
Why ask it
Practices differ, from sitting quietly in the room to a drink of water to bringing them downstairs. Following the household's usual approach matters more than any general advice, and a child in the dark will notice if you improvise.
Which doors, gates, windows, or stairs do I need to keep closed or watch?
Why ask it
Every house has one thing an outsider does not know: a stair gate that does not latch, a back door that unlocks from inside, a window a toddler can reach. Ask them to point at these rather than describe them.
Where is the first aid kit, and how would you want us to leave the house in a hurry?
Why ask it
Knowing the exit and the route with a child in your arms is a thirty second conversation you will never regret. Ask about the front door lock in particular, since deadbolts and key-operated locks slow people down badly.
Is anywhere or anything off limits: rooms, cupboards, the garden, the trampoline?
Why ask it
Children will confidently tell you they are allowed. Having the parents' list means you can hold the line without a negotiation, and it protects you if something gets broken or someone gets hurt.
What is the rule on screens tonight, and what are they allowed to watch or play?
Why ask it
The most common source of disagreement between sitters and parents. Ask for a time limit and a specific list, and ask what happens when the limit is reached, because that is the part children will test.
Is anyone expected at the door this evening, and what should I do if someone comes who is not?
Why ask it
Deliveries, a neighbour returning something, a relative dropping by, or a parent who does not live in the house. Ask directly whether there is anyone who should not be let in, because sitters are sometimes the last to be told.
What does it look like when they are getting overtired, and what helps?
Why ask it
Parents can usually name the specific signal, a particular whine, going quiet, becoming silly, and the thing that calms it. Recognising it twenty minutes early prevents most of the difficult part of an evening.
When they refuse to do something, how do you normally handle it?
Why ask it
You are asking to copy their approach rather than invent one. Whether the household uses counting, a warning, removing something, or simply waiting, consistency is what children respond to, and improvising undermines both you and the parents.
What can I decide for myself tonight, and what would you rather I called you about?
Why ask it
Sets the boundary explicitly so you are not weighing up whether a grazed knee or a friend at the door justifies interrupting a dinner. Most parents are relieved to be asked, and they will name a lower threshold than you expect.
Is anything going on at the moment that I should know about?
Why ask it
A new baby, a house move, an illness in the family, a death, a pet that has died, a change at school. It costs one question and it explains behaviour that would otherwise look like defiance. Ask it privately rather than in front of the children.
If they tell me something you would want to know, how should I pass it on?
Why ask it
Children say things to a sitter that they do not say to a parent. Agreeing in advance that you will mention it, by text or at the door, means you are not deciding alone whether something matters.
Can we confirm the hours and the rate, and what happens if you are back later than planned?
Why ask it
Best settled before the evening rather than at the door at midnight. Agree an hourly rate, when it starts, and what a late return is paid at, and whether you are expected to tidy up after bedtime.
The Handover Before the Parents Leave
Practical guidance for the conversation itself
How to Run the Handover
Ask the Safety Questions First
Parents are usually running late and the conversation gets cut short. Cover contact numbers, allergies and medication, the exit, and the off-limits list first. Bedtime and dinner can be worked out after they have gone; those four cannot.
Write It on Paper, Not Only in Your Phone
One sheet on the kitchen counter with the address, both mobile numbers, the backup contact, and the medication times. A phone gets used for a torch, runs out of battery, or is in another room when you need it.
Walk the House With Them
Two minutes moving through the rooms surfaces things nobody would think to mention: the stiff bathroom lock, the stair gate, where the nightlight plugs in, which tap runs scalding. Ask them to show you rather than tell you.
Ask the Children Too
Once the parents have gone, ask the children how bedtime usually goes. They will exaggerate their privileges, but they will also tell you the true details their parents forgot, like which book or which door position.
If You Only Have Two Minutes
The Four to Ask at the Door
- 1What time do you expect to be back, and what number reaches you if the first one does not?
- 2Are there any allergies, conditions, or medications I should know about?
- 3Which doors, gates, windows, or stairs do I need to keep closed or watch?
- 4What can I decide for myself tonight, and what would you rather I called you about?
Where Evenings Go Wrong
Assuming Nothing Has Changed Since Last Time
Medication, bedtimes, allergies, and who is allowed at the door all change between bookings, and parents assume you know. A thirty second check each time is not an insult to a family you sit for regularly.
Not Knowing the Address
It is the first thing an emergency operator asks, and people freeze on it in someone else's house. Have it written down and glance at it before the parents leave.
Negotiating Rules You Were Not Given
Without a clear list, children will decide the rules for you, and the parents will hear about it afterwards. Ask for specifics on food, screens, and bedtime rather than guessing at what seems reasonable.
Leaving Money Until the End of the Night
Sitters routinely go unpaid or underpaid because nothing was agreed. Confirm the rate, the start time, and the treatment of a late return before the evening begins, in a text if that is easier than saying it aloud.