Questions to Ask Elders
Meaningful questions to ask elderly family members, friends, or community members to learn from their wisdom, experiences, and life lessons.
1What was your childhood like, and what are your favorite memories from growing up?
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What was your childhood like, and what are your favorite memories from growing up?
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Why this works
Opens up conversation about their early life and helps you understand their background and what shaped them.
2What was the world like when you were my age, and how has it changed?
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What was the world like when you were my age, and how has it changed?
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Why this works
Provides historical perspective and helps you understand how the world has evolved over their lifetime.
3What are the most important lessons you've learned in your life?
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What are the most important lessons you've learned in your life?
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Why this works
Gets their wisdom and life lessons, which can be valuable guidance for your own life journey.
4What was your first job, and how did you get started in your career?
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What was your first job, and how did you get started in your career?
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Why this works
Provides insight into their work history and how they built their career, offering practical advice for your own professional development.
5What was the most challenging time in your life, and how did you get through it?
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What was the most challenging time in your life, and how did you get through it?
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Why this works
Gets their perspective on resilience and overcoming challenges, which can be inspiring and helpful for your own difficult times.
6What advice would you give to someone starting out in life?
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What advice would you give to someone starting out in life?
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Why this works
Gets their wisdom for young people and provides guidance that can help you navigate your own life decisions.
7What traditions or values from your family do you still practice today?
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What traditions or values from your family do you still practice today?
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Why this works
Helps you understand their cultural background and what values they hold dear, which can be meaningful for your own life.
8What was your favorite decade or time period in your life, and why?
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What was your favorite decade or time period in your life, and why?
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Why this works
Gets them to reflect on their happiest times and what made those periods special, offering insight into what brings them joy.
9What technology or invention has had the biggest impact on your life?
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What technology or invention has had the biggest impact on your life?
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Why this works
Provides perspective on how technology has changed their life and the world, offering historical context for technological change.
10What do you wish you had known when you were younger?
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What do you wish you had known when you were younger?
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Why this works
Gets their perspective on what they would have done differently, offering valuable lessons for your own life.
11What was your relationship with your parents like, and what did you learn from them?
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What was your relationship with your parents like, and what did you learn from them?
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Why this works
Provides insight into their family dynamics and what values they learned from their parents, which can be meaningful for your own family relationships.
12What was the most significant historical event you witnessed, and how did it affect you?
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What was the most significant historical event you witnessed, and how did it affect you?
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Why this works
Gets their perspective on major historical events and how they experienced them, providing valuable historical context.
13What hobbies or interests have you had throughout your life?
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What hobbies or interests have you had throughout your life?
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Why this works
Helps you understand their interests and what has brought them joy and fulfillment over the years.
14What was your experience with education, and how important was it to you?
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What was your experience with education, and how important was it to you?
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Why this works
Provides insight into their views on education and learning, which can be valuable for your own educational decisions.
15What was your experience with love and relationships?
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What was your experience with love and relationships?
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Why this works
Gets their perspective on love, marriage, and relationships, offering wisdom for your own romantic life.
16What was your experience with parenting, and what did you learn from it?
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What was your experience with parenting, and what did you learn from it?
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Why this works
Provides insight into their parenting experience and what they learned, which can be valuable for your own family life.
17What was your experience with friendship, and what makes a good friend?
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What was your experience with friendship, and what makes a good friend?
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Why this works
Gets their perspective on friendship and what they value in relationships, offering guidance for your own friendships.
18What was your experience with faith or spirituality?
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What was your experience with faith or spirituality?
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Why this works
Provides insight into their spiritual journey and what has been meaningful to them, which can be valuable for your own spiritual development.
19What was your experience with health and aging?
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What was your experience with health and aging?
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Why this works
Gets their perspective on health, aging, and what they've learned about taking care of themselves, offering practical advice for your own health.
20What do you hope for the future, and what are your wishes for the next generation?
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What do you hope for the future, and what are your wishes for the next generation?
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Why this works
Gets their hopes and dreams for the future and what they want for younger generations, providing insight into their values and aspirations.
Learning from Elders
Expert tips and techniques for getting the most out of these questions.
Approach with Respect
Show Respect
Approach the conversation with respect for their age, experience, and wisdom.
Be Patient
Be patient with their responses and give them time to think and share their thoughts.
Listen Actively
Pay close attention to their responses and show genuine interest in what they have to say.
Ask Thoughtfully
Ask Open-Ended Questions
Ask questions that encourage detailed responses and allow them to share their experiences fully.
Be Specific
Ask specific questions that will give you meaningful insights and practical advice.
Show Appreciation
Express gratitude for their time and willingness to share their wisdom and experiences.
Honor Their Wisdom
Reflect on Their Advice
Take time to reflect on their advice and how it applies to your own life and decisions.
Share Their Stories
Share their stories and wisdom with others, helping to preserve their legacy and knowledge.
Stay Connected
Maintain regular contact and continue to learn from their experiences and wisdom over time.