20 Questions

Questions to Ask Kids at Dinner

Engaging questions to ask kids during dinner to create meaningful conversations, build family bonds, and make mealtime more enjoyable and connected.

1

What was the best part of your day today?

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Why this works

Encourages positive reflection and helps you understand what brings them joy and satisfaction.

2

What's something you learned today that you didn't know before?

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Why this works

Encourages learning and helps you understand their interests and what captures their attention.

3

What's something that made you laugh today?

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Why this works

Encourages sharing of positive moments and helps you understand their sense of humor.

4

What's something you're grateful for today?

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Why this works

Encourages gratitude and positive thinking while helping you understand what they value.

5

What's something you're looking forward to?

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Why this works

Shows their hopes and dreams while helping you understand what excites them about life.

6

What's something you're proud of that you did recently?

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Why this works

Builds self-esteem and helps you celebrate their achievements while understanding their values.

7

What's something that was hard for you today?

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Why this works

Creates space to share challenges and helps you understand what they're struggling with.

8

What's something you're curious about?

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Why this works

Encourages curiosity and learning while helping you understand their interests and questions about the world.

9

What's something you're excited about?

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Why this works

Shows their enthusiasm and helps you understand what brings them joy and anticipation.

10

What's something you love about our family?

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Why this works

Encourages appreciation for family while helping you understand what they value about your family dynamic.

11

What's something you're really good at that you enjoy?

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Why this works

Helps you understand their strengths and interests while building their confidence.

12

What's something that made you feel proud of yourself?

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Why this works

Builds self-esteem and helps you understand their accomplishments and what they value about themselves.

13

What's something you wish you could do better?

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Why this works

Shows their self-awareness and helps you understand their goals and areas where they want to improve.

14

What's something you're curious about that you haven't explored yet?

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Why this works

Encourages their curiosity and can help you support them in trying new things.

15

What's something you wish you could change about yourself?

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Why this works

Creates space for self-reflection while helping you understand their self-perception and goals.

16

What's something you're really looking forward to in the future?

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Why this works

Shows their hopes and dreams while helping you understand what excites them about life.

17

What's something you love about being you?

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Why this works

Builds self-love and helps you understand what they value about themselves and their identity.

18

What's something you wish you could tell me but haven't?

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Why this works

Creates a safe space for open communication and helps you understand what they might be holding back.

19

What's something you're worried about?

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Why this works

Creates a safe space to share concerns and helps you understand what's on their mind.

20

What's something you're grateful for about our family?

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Why this works

Encourages appreciation for family while helping you understand what they value about your family dynamic.

Creating Meaningful Family Dinners

Expert tips and techniques for getting the most out of these questions.

Creating a Positive Dinner Environment

Create a Safe Space

Make dinner a judgment-free zone where everyone feels comfortable sharing their thoughts and feelings.

Listen Actively

Pay attention to what your children are saying and ask follow-up questions to show you're engaged.

Share Your Own Experiences

When appropriate, share your own related experiences to create connection and show that you understand.

Natural Conversation Flow

The Daily Check-in

Start with positive questions about their day
Ask about challenges they faced
Explore what they learned or discovered
End with gratitude or looking forward

The Interest Explorer

Ask about their hobbies and interests
Explore what they're curious about
Discuss their goals and aspirations
Share your own related interests

The Emotional Check-in

Ask about their feelings and emotions
Explore what makes them happy or worried
Discuss their relationships with friends
Create space for difficult conversations

Common Pitfalls to Avoid

Don't Interrogate

Avoid rapid-fire questions that feel like an interrogation. Space out questions and let the conversation flow naturally.

Avoid Leading Questions

Don't ask questions that suggest the answer you want to hear. Let them share their genuine thoughts and feelings.

Don't Dismiss Their Feelings

Even if their concerns seem small to you, they're real to them. Validate their feelings and take them seriously.

Further Reading

"The Family Dinner" by Laurie David
"How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk" by Adele Faber
"The Whole-Brain Child" by Daniel Siegel

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