Questions to Ask the Parents Before Babysitting
Questions to ask before the parents walk out of the door, covering contact numbers, food and allergies, medication, bedtime, house rules, and what to do if something goes wrong. Written for a first booking or a new family.
The questions
Open any question for the note
What time do you expect to be back, and where will you be?
Why ask it
Fixes the end of the shift and tells you whether you are covering an evening, a bedtime, or a whole night. If they are staying local, ask how long the journey home takes, because that is the number that matters when something happens.
What's the best number for each of you, and who do I call if neither of you picks up?
Why ask it
One number is not enough, since phones die and venues have no signal. Ask for a nearby adult who could actually come round, which is the gap most sitters only notice at the point they need it.
Who am I looking after, and what can each of them do on their own?
Why ask it
Ages tell you less than capability. A confident seven year old may still need help in the bath and a four year old may manage the toilet alone, so ask what each child does unaided.
What's the plan for dinner, and what are they actually allowed to eat?
Why ask it
Stops the standard sitter mistake of handing out something the household allows only at weekends. Ask what to do if a child refuses the meal, because that call belongs to the parents rather than to you.
Any allergies or foods they can't have, and what happens if they eat one by accident?
Why ask it
The second half is the part that matters. You need the symptoms to watch for, where any medication is kept, and whether the instruction is to phone them or to call an ambulance.
Is there any medication tonight? What dose, what time, and where is it?
Why ask it
Never accept an approximate answer to this. Repeat the dose and time back, and ask the parent to send it by text so there is a record neither of you has to remember.
Talk me through bedtime: what time, what order, and what do they need in the room?
Why ask it
Bedtime falls apart when the steps happen in the wrong order. Ask for the sequence in the parent's own words, and for the object a child cannot sleep without, since a missing one can cost you an hour.
If one of them wakes up in the night, what do you normally do?
Why ask it
Households differ sharply here, from going in straight away to waiting several minutes. Doing the opposite of the usual practice tends to make the night longer for everyone, including the parents when they get back.
What's the screen rule tonight, and what are they allowed to watch?
Why ask it
Children negotiate hard on this and will quote a rule that expired a year ago. Ask for tonight's limit and for approved programmes or games by name.
What are they not allowed to do that they'll tell me they are?
Why ask it
Invites parents to head off the negotiating that starts the moment the door shuts. Most will laugh and then list three specific things, which is exactly what you need.
If they won't do what I ask, what do you do, and what would you rather I didn't do?
Why ask it
Both halves matter. Sitters get into difficulty by improvising a consequence this family never uses, which the child will report accurately later.
Where's the first aid kit, and what would you want me to phone about rather than handle myself?
Why ask it
Draws the line between a scraped knee you deal with and a bump on the head you call about. Agree that line now, while nobody is upset.
If I had to call for an ambulance, what's the address here and what should I be able to tell them?
Why ask it
An emergency operator will ask for the address, the child's age, and any condition or medication. Write it down rather than trusting that you will recall it under pressure.
How do the locks and any alarm work, and do you want it locked while you're out?
Why ask it
These are awkward things to resolve by phone at eleven at night. Ask about a spare key as well, in case a door shuts behind you while you are in the garden.
Is anyone likely to knock or come by, and should I let them in?
Why ask it
Covers deliveries, neighbours, an older sibling returning, and anyone the family would rather not discuss. Whatever the answer, agree that you will not open the door to someone who was not named.
Are there rooms, cupboards, or stairs I should keep them out of?
Why ask it
Every home has a hazard the family has stopped noticing: the stair gate that does not latch, the unlocked cupboard, the pond. Asking makes them walk the house in their head before they leave.
Anything I need to do with the pets, and is any of them nervous around strangers?
Why ask it
Pets are the instruction most often forgotten in babysitting. A dog that guards its food or is uneasy with new people is a genuine risk with small children in the room.
Has anything been going on lately that's upsetting them, or that I shouldn't bring up?
Why ask it
A grandparent in hospital, a friendship that ended, or a parent working away changes how a child behaves at bedtime. It also stops you asking a cheerful question that lands badly.
What usually calms each of them down when they're crying?
Why ask it
Ask about each child separately, because what soothes one often provokes the other. Parents will name something specific: a song, a blanket, or being left alone for two minutes.
Is there anything you'd normally forget to tell a new sitter?
Why ask it
Closing on this catches the household details nobody thinks to mention: the noise the boiler makes, the cat that hides, the child who sleepwalks. Parents often produce the most useful sentence of the evening here.
Before the Parents Leave
Practical guidance for the conversation itself
In the first ten minutes
Do the tour on foot
Ask to be shown the kitchen, the bathroom, the children's rooms, the front door lock, and the light switches. Being told where something is does not stay in your head the way seeing it does.
Get the details in writing before they go
Ask the parent to text you the return time, any medication and dose, and both phone numbers. A text survives a flat landline and gives you something to read at two in the morning.
Meet the children while their parents are still there
Ten minutes of overlap lets you learn names and hear how the parent speaks to them. It also shortens the goodbye, which is the hardest part of the evening for a younger child.
For a repeat booking, ask what has changed
Medication, bedtime, and screen rules are the three that drift between visits. Everything else usually holds.
Common mistakes
Accepting "they'll tell you"
Children are unreliable narrators of their own bedtime and their own screen allowance. Take the rules from the adult who set them.
Not asking who else might turn up
An older sibling, a lodger, or a parent who lives elsewhere may arrive during the evening. Without knowing who is expected, you cannot make a safe decision at the door.
Leaving pay until afterwards
Agree the rate, how late hours are counted, and how you will be paid before the evening starts. It is a much harder conversation at midnight.
Guessing about medicine
If the dose is unclear, or the child claims they already had it, phone the parents. Nobody has ever been criticised for making that call.
Worth writing down for yourself
- The address of the house, in case you have to give it to an emergency operator.
- Both parents' numbers, plus one nearby adult who could come round.
- Each medication, its dose, and the time it is due, ideally in the parent's own text.
- Any allergy and what to do if there is a reaction.
- The bedtime sequence, in order.
- The wifi password, so a phone problem does not become a communication problem.