Questions to Ask Roommates Before Moving In
Questions for joining an existing shared house or forming a group of three or more. They cover the lease and who signs it, how bills and chores are actually handled, guests and partners, how the group settles disagreements, and what the landlord is like.
The questions
Open any question for the note
How long have you all lived together, and how did the last person leave?
Why ask it
The story of the last departure tells you more than any description of the house. Listen for whether it was amicable, and notice if anybody hesitates before answering.
Who is on the lease, and would I be signing it or subletting from one of you?
Why ask it
Being a subtenant rather than a leaseholder changes your notice period, your deposit and your say in who moves in next. Ask to read the actual document before you agree to anything.
How do you split the bills, and what does an average month come to?
Why ask it
A monthly total is a real number; bills are cheap is not. Ask for a winter month specifically, since heating is where shared budgets go wrong.
Who collects the money, and what happens when somebody pays late?
Why ask it
Someone always fronts the payments in a shared house, and that person carries the stress. How they describe late payers tells you how this group handles a small failure.
Is there a cleaning rota, and does it actually work?
Why ask it
Every house says there is a rota. The useful part is whether it is followed, and if not, who has quietly taken over the cleaning and how they feel about that.
How does the kitchen work: shared shelves, shared cooking, or everyone separate?
Why ask it
Kitchens are where shared houses succeed or fail. Fully shared food needs trust and similar budgets, fully separate needs enough shelf space, and in most houses one of those is already strained.
What's the bathroom like on a weekday morning?
Why ask it
One bathroom and four people starting at nine is a daily logistical problem. Ask about the actual sequence rather than counting bathrooms.
How loud does the house get on a weeknight?
Why ask it
You are asking for their baseline, not their best week. If the answers differ around the room, that disagreement is the most useful thing you will learn all evening.
Do people have parties here, and does anyone mind?
Why ask it
Parties are either fine or ruinous depending on who has to be up in the morning. Watch whether anyone looks resigned while somebody else answers.
How do partners staying over work, and does anyone effectively live here without being on the lease?
Why ask it
In many shared houses a partner is an unlisted resident using the shower, the heating and the wifi and paying nothing. Far better to know now than to become the only person who minds.
What do you do when two people disagree and neither will drop it?
Why ask it
Groups of three or more form majorities and stalemates in a way pairs never do. Whether this house has ever resolved something is more revealing than whether they say they get along.
Is there a house group chat, and what does it get used for?
Why ask it
The group chat is the nervous system of a shared house. Ask what the last few messages were about and you learn the tone of the place in ten seconds.
Do you eat together, or is that not a thing here?
Why ask it
Shared meals mark the difference between a home and a set of rooms. Neither is wrong, but joining the wrong one leaves you either eating alone or trapped at dinner every night.
What's the landlord like, and how quickly do repairs happen?
Why ask it
You will be dealing with this landlord for a year. Ask for a specific example, since fine covers everything from responsive to entirely absent.
What's the last thing that broke, and what happened?
Why ask it
A concrete repair story reveals both the landlord and the house: who reported it, how long it took, who paid, and whether anybody chased it.
Is there anything about this house I'd only find out after a month?
Why ask it
An open invitation to tell you the annoying truth: the boiler, the damp, the neighbour, the person who works nights. Somebody usually answers, and hesitation is an answer too.
How does the deposit work when somebody moves out?
Why ask it
Deposit handling between housemates is a common source of real financial loss. Find out whether the incoming person pays the outgoing one, and who decides the room is in acceptable condition.
Who's planning to leave when the lease ends?
Why ask it
If most of the house is going at the end of the term, you may be signing on with people you have not met. That changes the decision entirely.
What would make somebody a bad fit here?
Why ask it
Asking to be talked out of it gets honesty that positive questions never do. A house that cannot name any bad fit has either not thought about it or badly needs the rent.
If I said yes today, what would you want me to know on day one?
Why ask it
You get the practical handover: bin day, the trick with the front door, the boiler timer. You also find out whether they think of you as a housemate or as a missing payment.
Joining or forming a shared house
Practical guidance for the conversation itself
Meet the whole house, not one person
Ask to be there when everyone is home, ideally on an ordinary evening rather than a tidied-up viewing. The interesting information is in the disagreements: when two housemates give different answers about noise, guests or cleaning, that gap is the house you would be living in. If one person answers everything on behalf of the others, that is worth noticing too.
Read the paperwork before the vibe
- Ask whether it is a joint lease, where everyone is liable for the whole rent, or individual room contracts.
- On a joint lease, one person's unpaid rent can legally become everybody's problem, including yours.
- Check the end date and whether it renews automatically, since you may inherit a term you did not choose.
- Ask who holds the deposit and whether it is in a protection scheme, then verify rather than take the answer on trust.
- Ask whether the landlord knows about the change of occupant, because informal swaps sometimes are not permitted.
Agree the boring things in writing
A short house agreement is worth an hour of everyone's time: rent shares, which bills are in whose name, how shared supplies are bought, guests and overnight partners, quiet hours, cleaning, and how much notice somebody gives before leaving. It does not need legal weight to be useful. Its purpose is to end arguments about what was said in the kitchen in August.
Signals to take seriously
- Nobody can name what the last dispute was about, in a house of four people who have lived together a year.
- One housemate does all the cleaning and jokes about it.
- The rent split is uneven and nobody can explain why in a sentence.
- You are asked for cash or a deposit before seeing the lease.
- They will not let you talk to the person who is leaving.
- Everyone is very keen and very quick, which usually means somebody is about to be liable for an empty room.