Questions to Ask Your Wedding Coordinator
Twenty questions for a wedding coordinator, whether you are hiring full planning, partial planning or day-of coordination. Covers what the fee actually buys, who does setup and pack-down, when they take over your vendors, and what happens when the day runs late.
The questions
Open any question for the note
Is this full planning, partial planning or day-of coordination, and what does that mean in practice for us?
Why ask it
The same job title covers three very different services, and most disappointment traces back to this line being blurry. Ask them to say what they do not do, since day-of coordination usually excludes vendor sourcing, budget management and most setup.
What is the total fee, what counts as overtime, and what gets billed on top?
Why ask it
Get the number that includes travel, an assistant, a meal, a hotel night for a far venue, and the hourly rate after the contracted end time. Weddings run long more often than they run short, so the overtime rate is the figure most likely to appear on your final invoice.
How many weddings do you take on in the same weekend?
Why ask it
Two in a weekend is common and manageable; two in a day means you are getting an assistant for part of yours. The answer also tells you how much attention you will get in the final week, which is when most questions arrive.
Who from your team will be on site, and what is each person doing?
Why ask it
Ask for names and roles, then check that the contract names the person you have been dealing with as the lead on site. Larger weddings need a second coordinator to be in two places during the ceremony-to-reception switch, and a single person covering a hundred and fifty guests will be stretched.
What time do you arrive, and when do you leave?
Why ask it
Some coordinators leave after the first dance, which is before the parts that most often go wrong: the late bar, transport home, and pack-down. If your contract ends at ten, ask who is running the last two hours.
Have you worked at our venue before, and if not, when will you see it?
Why ask it
Venue knowledge is most of the value on the day: where the power is, how long the room flip takes, which door the caterers use, whether the aisle gets sun at four. If they have not been, a site visit before the final timeline is written should be in the plan.
Who writes the day-of timeline, and when do we get to review it?
Why ask it
The timeline is the actual product you are buying. You want a draft several weeks out, not the night before, and you want to see it shared with every vendor. If they cannot say when it will exist, nothing else in the contract will hold.
When do you take over talking to our vendors, and on the day, do they call you or us?
Why ask it
There should be a clear handover date after which your phone stops ringing. Ask whether they contact each vendor to confirm arrival times, and make sure your own number is not the one on the schedule.
Do you set up the decor and personal items yourself, or is that someone else's job?
Why ask it
This is the most common gap between expectation and contract. Placing four hundred place cards, hanging installations, moving furniture and lighting candles takes hours, and many coordinators supervise rather than do it. Get the split written down item by item.
At the end of the night, who packs up the gifts, the rented items and our own things?
Why ask it
Rental companies charge for missing items and venues clear rooms fast. You want a named person for the gifts and cards, the top-table items, the cake, and anything borrowed, and to know whether that person is on their team or your family.
Do you handle final vendor payments and gratuities on the day?
Why ask it
Some coordinators carry a set of labeled envelopes and settle balances so nobody has to find you mid-reception. If they do not, that job lands on a parent or a friend, and it needs assigning before the day rather than during it.
What do you need from us, and by which dates?
Why ask it
Ask for the actual list: final numbers, seating chart, vendor contacts, timeline sign-off, family photo list, shot list, dietary requirements. A coordinator who can produce it immediately has a system; one who says just keep me posted will be chasing you in the final two weeks.
In the last two weeks, how do you prefer to communicate?
Why ask it
Everything speeds up at the end and mismatched habits cause real problems. Find out whether they answer texts in the evening, how quickly they usually reply, and whether they go quiet on the days they are working other weddings.
If the ceremony starts forty minutes late, what do you cut?
Why ask it
A test of judgment rather than policy, and the good answer is specific: shorten drinks, hold the speeches until dessert, trim the family photo list, talk to the band about the last set. Anyone who says it will not happen has not run enough weddings.
What is the wet weather plan, who makes the call, and by when?
Why ask it
You want a named decision-maker, a deadline tied to the setup time rather than the ceremony, and a written plan B including where guests wait. Outdoor weddings fail on the timing of this call, not on the existence of a marquee.
How do you handle a family member or guest who ignores the plan?
Why ask it
Every wedding has one: someone who blocks the aisle with a phone, a relative who wants to add a speech, a guest who has had too much. Listen for a calm, practiced approach and for whether they will do it themselves rather than coming to find you.
Tell me about a wedding where something went badly wrong. What did you do?
Why ask it
The most revealing question on the list. Experienced coordinators have a late cake, a missing suit or a vendor no-show story and tell it plainly, including what they could not fix. A polished answer with no real problem in it means either inexperience or a rehearsed pitch.
What do couples at a venue like ours most often forget?
Why ask it
Invites their expertise instead of your checklist, and the answers tend to be practical: transport at the end of the night, shade or heaters, a plan for children after nine, feeding vendors, somewhere to store gifts securely.
If you are ill on the day, who covers, and how would they be briefed?
Why ask it
You are looking for a named person or a network, plus documentation good enough for someone else to run the day. A solo coordinator with no backup arrangement is a genuine risk, and the contract should say what happens to your money.
Are you insured, and can you send our venue a certificate?
Why ask it
Many venues will not admit suppliers without proof of public liability cover, and this is a routine request that should get an immediate yes. Hesitation here tends to indicate a newer business, which may still be fine but changes what else you check.
Working with a Coordinator
Practical guidance for the conversation itself
Setting It Up Properly
Understand who the venue's coordinator works for
An in-house venue coordinator manages the building, the staff and the catering, and answers to the venue. They are not there to chase your florist, run your rehearsal or defend your timeline against the venue's own preferences. Booking one does not replace hiring your own.
Tell everyone who is in charge
Put your coordinator's name and number on the invitations to the wedding party, in the vendor emails and on the timeline. If family and suppliers do not know to call them, they will call you, and you will spend your wedding on the phone.
Name one decision-maker for the day
Decide in advance who answers questions if you are unreachable, and make sure it is not four people. Most day-of confusion comes from a vendor asking three relatives and getting three answers.
Hand over photographs of what you want, not descriptions
For each table, sign, backdrop and personal item, give them a photo and a location. Written instructions get interpreted; a picture of the finished arrangement does not.
Give them the awkward information
Divorced parents who should not be seated together, a friend with a drinking problem, a grandparent who tires by eight, a guest who has not been told about the seating. A coordinator can only manage what they know about, and they will not repeat it.
The Handover
What to send two weeks out
- 1Final guest count, the seating chart, and a note of dietary needs by name.
- 2Every vendor's name, phone number, arrival time and what they need on site.
- 3A who's who list: wedding party, parents, readers, speakers, and anyone with a role.
- 4A photo list for the family shots, in the order you want them called.
- 5Setup photos and an inventory of everything you are bringing, plus where each item goes.
- 6Payment envelopes, balances outstanding, and who is settling what on the day.
The final call, one week before
- 1Walk the timeline hour by hour and say out loud where you will physically be.
- 2Confirm who is holding rings, marriage license, vows, speeches and phone chargers.
- 3Agree what they should decide without asking you, and what must come to you.
- 4Agree the weather deadline and who makes that call.
- 5Confirm pack-down: who takes what home, in whose car, and who locks up.
Where It Goes Wrong
- Assuming day-of coordination includes setup. Unless the contract lists it, someone in your family will be tying chair sashes an hour before the ceremony.
- Leaving overtime out of the budget. If the party overruns, the coordinator, the band and the venue staff all bill for it, and the decision gets made at midnight.
- Changing the timeline in the final week without telling the coordinator. Vendors have already been given arrival times, and a shifted ceremony can mean cold food and a missing photographer.
- Hiring a coordinator and then continuing to manage the vendors yourself. Suppliers end up with two sources of instruction, and the conflicting version is the one that reaches the site.
- Not telling them your priorities. If the photographs matter more to you than the speeches, say so, because when time is lost something has to give.
- Choosing on price without comparing the hours. Two quotes that differ by half are usually eight hours of coverage versus fourteen, one coordinator versus two.