20 Questions

Story Questions to Ask

Engaging questions to uncover stories, create meaningful connections, and spark deeper conversations with anyone.

1

What's the most interesting thing that happened to you this week?

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Why this works

Opens up recent experiences and encourages storytelling about current events and daily life.

2

What's a childhood memory that still makes you smile?

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Why this works

Reveals positive early experiences and shows what moments of joy and innocence they treasure.

3

What's the most unexpected thing that ever happened to you?

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Why this works

Encourages sharing of surprising experiences and shows how they handle unexpected situations.

4

What's a time when you felt truly proud of yourself?

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Why this works

Reveals their achievements and shows what accomplishments they value most and why.

5

What's the funniest thing that ever happened to you?

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Why this works

Encourages humor and shows their sense of comedy and what they find amusing or entertaining.

6

What's a moment when you felt completely at peace?

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Why this works

Reveals their sources of calm and shows what environments or experiences bring them tranquility.

7

What's a time when you learned something important about yourself?

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Why this works

Encourages self-reflection and shows what insights they've gained about their own character and abilities.

8

What's the most beautiful place you've ever been?

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Why this works

Reveals their appreciation for beauty and shows what natural or cultural environments they find most inspiring.

9

What's a time when you felt completely understood by someone?

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Why this works

Shows their need for connection and reveals what kind of understanding and empathy they value most.

10

What's a moment when you felt completely lost or confused?

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Why this works

Encourages vulnerability and shows how they handle uncertainty and difficult emotional states.

11

What's a time when you surprised yourself with what you could do?

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Why this works

Reveals their self-discovery and shows what challenges they've overcome that exceeded their expectations.

12

What's a moment when you felt completely grateful?

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Why this works

Shows their appreciation for life and reveals what experiences or people they're most thankful for.

13

What's a time when you felt completely inspired?

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Why this works

Reveals their sources of motivation and shows what ideas or experiences spark their creativity and drive.

14

What's a moment when you felt completely alone?

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Why this works

Encourages sharing of difficult experiences and shows how they handle isolation and loneliness.

15

What's a time when you felt completely connected to someone?

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Why this works

Shows their need for intimacy and reveals what kind of connections they value most in relationships.

16

What's a moment when you felt completely free?

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Why this works

Reveals their desire for liberation and shows what experiences or situations make them feel most unconstrained.

17

What's a time when you felt completely challenged?

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Why this works

Shows their approach to difficulty and reveals what kinds of challenges they find most engaging or difficult.

18

What's a moment when you felt completely loved?

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Why this works

Reveals their need for affection and shows what kind of love and care they value most.

19

What's a time when you felt completely hopeful?

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Why this works

Shows their optimism and reveals what experiences or people give them hope for the future.

20

What's a moment when you felt completely yourself?

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Why this works

Reveals their authentic self and shows what environments or situations allow them to be most genuine.

Best Practices for Storytelling Conversations

Expert tips and techniques for getting the most out of these questions.

Best Practices

Listen Actively

Give your full attention to the storyteller and show genuine interest in their experiences and perspectives.

Ask Follow-Up Questions

Encourage deeper exploration of their stories by asking about details, emotions, and outcomes.

Share Your Own Stories

Create a mutual exchange by sharing your own experiences and stories to build connection and trust.

Question Sequences

The Recent Experience Sequence

1
What's the most interesting thing that happened to you this week?
2
What's a time when you felt completely proud of yourself?
3
What's a moment when you felt completely at peace?
4
What's a time when you learned something important about yourself?

The Emotional Journey Sequence

1
What's a moment when you felt completely understood?
2
What's a time when you felt completely lost?
3
What's a moment when you felt completely connected?
4
What's a time when you felt completely loved?

Common Pitfalls

Don't Interrupt the Story

Allow the storyteller to complete their thoughts and avoid jumping in with your own experiences too quickly.

Avoid Judging Their Stories

Listen without judgment and avoid making assumptions about their experiences or how they should have handled situations.

Don't Rush the Process

Give them time to think and share their stories without rushing or pushing for quick answers.

Storytelling Templates

The Story Discovery

1
Step 1: Start with recent experiences and current events
2
Step 2: Explore childhood memories and early experiences
3
Step 3: Discuss moments of pride and achievement
4
Step 4: Share stories of connection and understanding

The Emotional Exploration

1
Step 1: Discuss moments of peace and tranquility
2
Step 2: Explore times of challenge and difficulty
3
Step 3: Share stories of love and connection
4
Step 4: Reflect on moments of hope and inspiration

Further Reading

"The Storytelling Animal" by Jonathan Gottschall
"The Power of Story" by Jim Loehr
"Story" by Robert McKee
"The Art of Storytelling" by John Walsh

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