Questions to Ask a New Mom
Thoughtful questions to ask a new mom to show your support, learn about her experience, and help her feel heard and understood during this important time in her life.
1How are you feeling today, and what has been the most challenging part of your day?
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How are you feeling today, and what has been the most challenging part of your day?
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Why this works
Shows genuine care for her well-being and helps you understand what she's going through.
2What has been the most surprising thing about motherhood so far?
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What has been the most surprising thing about motherhood so far?
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Why this works
Encourages her to share her experiences and helps you understand what she's learning about being a mom.
3What has been the most rewarding moment you've had with your baby?
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What has been the most rewarding moment you've had with your baby?
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Why this works
Helps her focus on positive experiences and share the joy of motherhood.
4What has been the most difficult part of adjusting to life with a newborn?
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What has been the most difficult part of adjusting to life with a newborn?
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Why this works
Shows you're there to support her through challenges and helps you understand what she needs help with.
5What has been the most helpful advice you've received, and who gave it to you?
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What has been the most helpful advice you've received, and who gave it to you?
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Why this works
Helps you understand what support she's found valuable and what advice has been most helpful.
6What has been the most unexpected thing about being a mom?
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What has been the most unexpected thing about being a mom?
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Why this works
Encourages her to share her unique experiences and helps you understand what she's discovering about motherhood.
7What has been the most challenging part of balancing your needs with your baby's needs?
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What has been the most challenging part of balancing your needs with your baby's needs?
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Why this works
Shows you understand the struggle of self-care and helps you understand what she needs support with.
8What has been the most important thing you've learned about yourself since becoming a mom?
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What has been the most important thing you've learned about yourself since becoming a mom?
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Why this works
Encourages self-reflection and helps you understand how she's growing and changing as a person.
9What has been the most difficult part of dealing with sleep deprivation?
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What has been the most difficult part of dealing with sleep deprivation?
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Why this works
Shows you understand the physical challenges and helps you understand what she needs support with.
10What has been the most helpful thing someone has done for you since you became a mom?
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What has been the most helpful thing someone has done for you since you became a mom?
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Why this works
Helps you understand what support she's found most valuable and what you can do to help.
11What has been the most challenging part of dealing with your changing body?
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What has been the most challenging part of dealing with your changing body?
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Why this works
Shows you understand the physical changes and helps you understand what she needs support with.
12What has been the most important thing you've learned about your baby's personality?
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What has been the most important thing you've learned about your baby's personality?
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Why this works
Encourages her to share about her baby and helps you understand what she's discovering about her child.
13What has been the most difficult part of dealing with your changing emotions?
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What has been the most difficult part of dealing with your changing emotions?
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Why this works
Shows you understand the emotional challenges and helps you understand what she needs support with.
14What has been the most helpful thing you've learned about feeding your baby?
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What has been the most helpful thing you've learned about feeding your baby?
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Why this works
Helps you understand what she's learned about feeding and what support she's found valuable.
15What has been the most challenging part of dealing with visitors and well-wishers?
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What has been the most challenging part of dealing with visitors and well-wishers?
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Why this works
Shows you understand the social challenges and helps you understand what she needs support with.
16What has been the most important thing you've learned about your relationship with your partner?
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What has been the most important thing you've learned about your relationship with your partner?
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Why this works
Encourages her to share about her relationship and helps you understand how motherhood has affected her partnership.
17What has been the most difficult part of dealing with your changing priorities?
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What has been the most difficult part of dealing with your changing priorities?
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Why this works
Shows you understand the life changes and helps you understand what she needs support with.
18What has been the most helpful thing you've learned about self-care as a new mom?
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What has been the most helpful thing you've learned about self-care as a new mom?
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Why this works
Helps you understand what she's learned about taking care of herself and what support she's found valuable.
19What has been the most important thing you've learned about your own strength?
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What has been the most important thing you've learned about your own strength?
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Why this works
Encourages her to recognize her own resilience and helps you understand how she's growing as a person.
20What has been the most difficult part of dealing with your changing identity?
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What has been the most difficult part of dealing with your changing identity?
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Why this works
Shows you understand the identity changes and helps you understand what she needs support with.
Supporting a New Mom
Expert tips and techniques for getting the most out of these questions.
Approaching the Conversation
Be Patient and Understanding
Give her time to think and share, and listen without judgment to her experiences.
Show Genuine Interest
Ask questions that demonstrate your interest in her well-being and her experiences as a new mom.
Create a Safe Space
Ensure she feels comfortable sharing her thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment or criticism.
Active Listening
Listen Without Interrupting
Allow her to share her experiences completely without cutting her off or rushing her.
Ask Follow-up Questions
Show interest by asking follow-up questions that help you understand her experiences better.
Validate Her Experiences
Acknowledge her experiences and show appreciation for the strength and resilience she's showing.
Providing Support
Offer Practical Help
Ask what you can do to help with practical tasks like cooking, cleaning, or running errands.
Be Available
Let her know you're available to listen and support her whenever she needs it.
Celebrate Her Strength
Acknowledge her strength and resilience as a new mom and celebrate her achievements.