20 Questions

Questions to Ask Long Distance Relationship

Meaningful questions to ask your long-distance partner that strengthen your connection, build intimacy, and help you navigate the unique challenges of distance.

1

What's the hardest part about being in a long-distance relationship for you?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Opens honest communication about challenges while showing empathy and understanding for their struggles.

2

What's something you're looking forward to doing together when we're finally in the same place?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Creates shared excitement and helps you both focus on positive future moments together.

3

How do you like to feel connected to me when we're apart?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Reveals their preferred ways of maintaining intimacy and helps you understand how to meet their emotional needs.

4

What's your ideal way to spend time together virtually?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Helps you plan meaningful virtual dates and activities that both of you will enjoy and look forward to.

5

What's something you wish I understood better about your daily life?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Helps you understand their world and daily experiences while showing genuine interest in their life.

6

How do you handle missing me, and what helps you feel better?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Shows care for their emotional well-being while helping you understand how to support them during difficult moments.

7

What's your favorite memory of us together, and why does it mean so much to you?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Strengthens your bond by focusing on positive shared experiences while revealing what they value most about your relationship.

8

What's something you're excited to share with me about your day?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Encourages daily connection and shows interest in their life while creating opportunities for meaningful conversation.

9

How do you envision our future together, and what are you most excited about?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Creates shared vision and helps you both stay motivated and committed to the relationship despite the distance.

10

What's something you've learned about yourself since we've been apart?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Shows interest in their personal growth while helping you understand how they're evolving as an individual.

11

What's your ideal way to handle disagreements when we're not together?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Establishes healthy conflict resolution strategies while ensuring you can work through problems effectively despite the distance.

12

What's something you're proud of that you want me to know about?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Celebrates their achievements while showing support and pride in their accomplishments.

13

How do you like to receive love and affection from me when we're apart?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Reveals their love language and helps you understand how to express your feelings in ways that resonate with them.

14

What's something you're worried about regarding our relationship?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Opens honest communication about concerns while creating opportunities to address fears and build trust.

15

What's your favorite way to start and end your day when we're apart?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Helps you understand their daily routines while creating opportunities to be part of their morning and evening rituals.

16

What's something you're excited to learn about me that you don't know yet?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Shows interest in continued discovery while creating opportunities for deeper connection and understanding.

17

How do you like to celebrate special moments together when we're apart?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Helps you plan meaningful celebrations while ensuring important moments are still special despite the distance.

18

What's something you're grateful for about our relationship?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Focuses on positive aspects while helping you both appreciate what you have together.

19

What's your ideal way to handle the transition when we're about to be apart again?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Helps you both prepare for separations while ensuring the transition is as smooth and supportive as possible.

20

What's something you're excited to show me or share with me the next time we're together?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Creates anticipation for your next meeting while helping you plan meaningful activities and experiences together.

Best Practices for Long-Distance Relationships

Expert tips and techniques for getting the most out of these questions.

Best Practices

Communicate Regularly and Consistently

Establish regular communication patterns that work for both of you. Consistency helps maintain connection and reduces anxiety.

Be Intentional About Quality Time

Make the most of your time together, whether virtual or in person. Focus on meaningful conversations and shared experiences.

Show Appreciation and Support

Express gratitude for your partner's efforts and provide emotional support during challenging times.

Conversation Starters

The Connection Builder

1
What's the hardest part about being in a long-distance relationship for you?
2
How do you like to feel connected to me when we're apart?
3
What's your ideal way to spend time together virtually?
4
How do you like to receive love and affection from me when we're apart?

The Future Focus

1
What's something you're looking forward to doing together when we're finally in the same place?
2
How do you envision our future together, and what are you most excited about?
3
What's something you're excited to show me the next time we're together?
4
What's your ideal way to handle the transition when we're about to be apart again?

Common Pitfalls

Don't Avoid Difficult Conversations

Address problems and concerns openly. Avoiding difficult topics can lead to resentment and misunderstandings.

Avoid Over-Communication

While regular communication is important, don't overwhelm each other. Find a balance that works for both of you.

Don't Neglect Individual Growth

Maintain your own interests and friendships. A healthy relationship includes two individuals who continue to grow.

Conversation Templates

The Daily Check-in

1
Step 1: Start with: "What's something you're excited to share with me about your day?"
2
Step 2: Follow with: "What's your favorite way to start and end your day when we're apart?"
3
Step 3: Connect with: "How do you like to feel connected to me when we're apart?"

The Future Planning

1
Step 1: Begin with: "What's something you're looking forward to doing together when we're finally in the same place?"
2
Step 2: Explore with: "How do you envision our future together, and what are you most excited about?"
3
Step 3: Plan with: "What's something you're excited to show me the next time we're together?"

Further Reading

"The Long-Distance Relationship Survival Guide" by Kate Brauer-Bell
"Making Love Last Forever" by Gary Smalley
"The 5 Love Languages" by Gary Chapman

Find Your Perfect Questions

Search our collection of thoughtful questions for any conversation or situation