Questions to Ask Someone About Their Job
For anyone who wants to hear what a job is really like from the person who does it: a student with a career assignment or a question for a career day speaker, a curious relative, or someone making conversation at dinner. The questions work for any occupation. The first five are the ones nearly everyone starts with. After that they run from the day to day, through how they got there and the hard parts, to money and prospects (asked politely) and advice. Each has a note on what to listen for, what to ask next or when to leave it alone.
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The questions
Each question, and why to ask it
Start here
What does a typical day at work look like for you?
Why ask it
The question most people expect, which makes it an easy place to begin. The first answer tends to be a tidy outline, so follow it with 'and what did yesterday look like?' to get the interruptions and the hour that went on something unplanned. If they say no two days are alike, ask for the two that differ most.
How did you get into this line of work?
Why ask it
It invites the whole story, and people tell it in their own order: a course, a relative in the trade, a job that was only meant to last a summer. Notice whether they describe a plan or a string of accidents. For a report, ask for rough dates as they go so you can lay the route out afterwards.
What do you like most about your job?
Why ask it
An easy one to answer, and it tells you what the job gives back besides a wage: the people, the problem-solving, being outdoors, seeing a thing finished. If the answer is 'the people I work with', ask what they like about the work itself as well, since colleagues change from one workplace to the next.
What is the hardest part of your job?
Why ask it
Ask it in the same even tone as the question before, and most people answer just as readily. Listen for whether the hard part is the work, the hours, the pressure or other people, because each suits a different kind of person. Then ask what makes it worth putting up with.
What advice would you give someone who wants to do your job?
Why ask it
Broad advice comes back broad ('work hard, stay curious'), so narrow it once you have the first answer: what should a person do this year, and what is not worth bothering with? If you are not after the job yourself, say so and ask what they would tell their younger self.
The day to day
If a ten-year-old asked what you do all day, what would you say?
Why ask it
A job title tells an outsider very little, so get the work in plain words early. The ten-year-old is there to strip out the jargon. If a term slips through anyway, ask what it means and write down the simple version.
What is your exact job title, and who do you work for?
Why ask it
Dull but necessary for a school report, and worth getting right before you leave. Ask them to spell anything unusual. One title can mean different work at different employers, so write down what it covers at theirs.
What are the three or four main things you are responsible for?
Why ask it
Asking for three or four keeps the answer from turning into the whole job description. Once you have them, ask which takes the most hours and which matters most. Those are often two different things.
What hours do you work, and do they include nights, weekends or being on call?
Why ask it
'Full time' can mean a fixed shift or whenever the phone rings, so ask what last week's hours came to. Whether the pattern was their choice or came with the job is worth knowing too. Hours differ between employers, so take theirs as one example of the occupation.
Do you work mostly on your own or as part of a team?
Why ask it
Some people spend the day alone in a van or at a screen, and others cannot do a thing without four colleagues. Ask who they depend on most and who depends on them. A student who already knows which they prefer can use the answer to rule a job in or out.
What is the first thing you do when you get to work?
Why ask it
The first half hour shows what the job runs on: a handover from the last shift, an inbox, a safety check, a list. Ask what would go wrong if they skipped it, which tells you what the routine is protecting.
If I followed you around for a day, what would bore me and what would surprise me?
Why ask it
A second run at the typical day from another angle: they have to picture you standing there watching. The surprise is the part they will enjoy telling. The boring part is likely the larger share of the hours, so don't let them skip it.
Who is your work for, and do you ever meet them?
Why ask it
Most work has someone at the end of it: a customer, a patient, a reader, another department. People who meet that person every day describe a very different job from people who never do, and most have a firm view on which they would choose.
If you stayed home for a week, what would stop happening?
Why ask it
It gets past the list of duties to what the job is for. A quick answer means they can see what their work produces. If they have to think, that is no bad sign: some work only shows when it is missing, so ask who would notice first.
Where does the work happen: one place, several, or wherever you are sent?
Why ask it
People tend to picture an office or picture nothing at all. The real setting, whether that is a truck, a ward, a kitchen table or four sites in a day, shapes the job as much as the tasks do. If you are writing a report, get the physical details down here.
If you could keep only one tool, machine or program at work, which would it be?
Why ask it
Forcing a single choice gets a real object where 'what tools do you use' gets a list. It makes a good detail for a school report, especially if you find out what people in the job did before it existed.
How far ahead do you know what you will be doing: an hour, a week, a year?
Why ask it
Some jobs are a calendar set months ahead, and others are whatever comes through the door. Neither is better, but most people know which one suits them, and a student should work out which they are. A schedule that changes at two days' notice belongs in this answer too.
What is the busiest time of your day, week or year, and what does busy look like?
Why ask it
Nearly every occupation has a rush: month end, harvest, the holidays, exam season, Friday night. How they describe it tells you whether the pressure is the enjoyable kind or the kind they brace for.
Does the working day have a finish line, or do you just stop?
Why ask it
Some work is done when the last delivery is made or the shift ends. Other work is never finished, only paused, and the people who do it tend to need a rule for when to stop. No rule usually means the job follows them home.
What small chore eats more of your week than anyone would guess?
Why ask it
Job ads rarely mention chasing signatures, restocking, calming people down or fixing the printer. The answer usually comes with a laugh. If it comes with a sigh, that chore may be a bigger share of the week than they would like.
What is a word or phrase from your work that an outsider would not understand?
Why ask it
Trade slang is fun at a dinner table and useful in a school report. Ask for the story behind it. The phrase usually points at something the job cares about, such as a common fault or a kind of customer.
Is there a uniform, a dress code or an unwritten rule about what people wear?
Why ask it
An easy one that younger askers can put without nerves. The answer covers safety gear, what customers expect and how formal the place is. Whether the employer or the worker pays for the clothes varies from one workplace to the next.
Is there a film, show or book that gets your job right, and one that gets it badly wrong?
Why ask it
Anyone whose job turns up on screen has probably winced at it. The complaints are instructive: nobody on screen does the paperwork, and everything takes five minutes. If something does get it right, you have somewhere to look next.
What is the strangest or funniest thing that has happened to you at work?
Why ask it
Children at a career day ask this one, and adults want to. The story is often well practiced and a pleasure to tell, which loosens up a stiff conversation. Some work is confidential, so let them pick a story they are free to share.
When did you last go home pleased with a day's work, and what had happened?
Why ask it
Asking for one particular day gets a story where 'what do you like about it' gets a list. Listen for whether the good day was about finishing something, helping someone or solving a puzzle. That is the reward this job has to offer.
How they got there
How long have you been doing this job, and how long in this kind of work altogether?
Why ask it
Two numbers, and the gap between them is a question in itself: several employers, a change of specialty or a late start. It also tells you how to weigh the rest of what they say. Two years in, they remember being new. Twenty years in, they have watched the work change.
Why did you choose this career, and is that still the reason you stay?
Why ask it
The reason for starting and the reason for staying are often different. Someone who came for the pay may have stayed for the people, or the other way round. If they say they never really chose it, plenty of people would say the same, and how it happened is just as interesting.
What education, training or license does someone need to do your job?
Why ask it
Most career worksheets want this answer. Get the names of the qualifications and roughly how long each takes. Requirements differ by country, state and employer and may have changed since they qualified, so ask what a newcomer would need today where they work, then check it with the licensing body or a current job ad.
Which school subjects or courses have turned out to be useful in your work?
Why ask it
Students can act on this one straight away. The answer is sometimes unexpected: the writing class for an engineer, the arithmetic for a chef. If they left school long ago, ask what they would take now if they were choosing courses.
Is any part of your job something you dreamed of doing as a child?
Why ask it
A gentle way into the career story that works on anyone, from a grandparent to a guest speaker. Sometimes a thread survives: the would-be vet who works outdoors, the would-be pilot who likes checklists. If nothing survives, ask what the plan was and when it changed.
How old were you when you first met someone who did this job?
Why ask it
Plenty of occupations are invisible until you meet someone who has one. If they were twenty-five and it was a friend of a friend, that tells a student the jobs they have heard of at school are not the whole list. If a parent did it, ask whether that helped or made it harder.
Was there a person who steered you toward this work or showed you it was possible?
Why ask it
Many career stories have a teacher, relative or first boss in them somewhere. Get what that person actually said or did, because 'she believed in me' is hard to write up. If there was nobody, how they worked it out alone is the story.
What was your first paid work of any kind, and did it teach you something you still use?
Why ask it
This is about the paper route or the Saturday shop job, long before the career. The lesson they name, such as turning up on time or handling a rude customer, applies to whatever job a young person takes next.
What other kinds of work did you seriously consider, and what tipped the balance?
Why ask it
The runner-up career shows what they were choosing between. Sometimes the deciding factor was practical, like which course was nearer or which employer called back first. That is worth hearing if you imagine careers are always chosen on purpose.
What did your family think when you chose this work?
Why ask it
Pride, worry and bafflement are all possible, and the answer brings in where they come from. Go carefully if the choice went against what the family wanted. A short reply here means move on.
Did you learn this work in a classroom, on the job, or by teaching yourself?
Why ask it
Most people name a mix, so get rough proportions. A student needs this alongside the list of qualifications, because it says where the real learning happens. If most of it came on the job, ask what the classroom part turned out to be good for.
How long did it take from deciding on this work to being trusted to do it on your own?
Why ask it
One question that takes in schooling, training, licensing and supervised practice. For an assignment, have them break the total into stages and note how long each took. The route may have changed since they took it, so check the current one before you quote theirs.
Did you have to move, start again at the bottom or take a pay cut to get into this work?
Why ask it
Getting in often costs something the tidy version of the story leaves out: a new town, a junior title at thirty-five, a lean couple of years. If the answer is yes, find out how long it took to feel worth it. A plain no is worth noting too, though one person's easy start does not mean everyone gets one.
What were you doing just before this job, and why did you move?
Why ask it
The reason for the last move shows what they were looking for: more money, better hours, a shorter drive, a boss they could stand. If the answer is guarded, leave it. People do not always leave jobs on their own terms.
On your first day in the job, who showed you around and what went wrong?
Why ask it
First days stick. You may hear about being lost, being handed something far too important, or being ignored until lunch. It is worth knowing whether new people there get the same treatment now.
Who taught you the most once you were in the job, and how did they do it?
Why ask it
Much of any occupation is learned from the person at the next bench or desk. Whether the teaching was patient explanation, being thrown in or being corrected in front of others tells you how the trade passes on what it knows.
What was the first sign that you were suited to this?
Why ask it
It might be a compliment from a customer, a task that came easily or simply not minding the part everyone else hated. If they say they are still waiting for the sign, laugh with them and ask what has kept them at it.
What is the luckiest break you had along the way?
Why ask it
Careers look planned when they are told backwards. Asking about luck lets them admit the chance meeting or the vacancy that opened at the right moment. Then ask what they had done to be ready for it, which is the part someone else can copy.
What are you proudest of in your working life so far?
Why ask it
Modest people need a second before they answer this, so wait. It may be a project, a person they trained or simply having kept a business going through a bad year. What they choose shows what they count as success, which is not always what their employer counts.
Before you started, what did you picture the job being like, and how close was that?
Why ask it
The gap between the picture and the reality is what an outsider most needs to hear, because you are probably holding the same picture. Notice which way it went: better, worse or simply different. If you are choosing a course on the strength of that picture, press for one concrete example.
The hard parts
What part of your job is harder than it looks from outside?
Why ask it
Most occupations have something outsiders assume is easy: keeping a class quiet, backing up a trailer, writing a short email that offends nobody. The answer earns them some deserved credit, which makes this a kind way into the difficult subjects.
What do you like least about your job?
Why ask it
Paired with what they like most, this gives you both sides in under a minute. People often name something small and constant, like the commute, the forms or one recurring meeting, and not the dramatic part. If they say 'nothing', smile and ask what they would hand to someone else if they could.
What is the most stressful part of your job, and how do you handle it?
Why ask it
Find out where the stress comes from: a deadline, a risk of someone getting hurt, money, an angry public. The second half is the part to write down, since their way of coping is something they had to work out for themselves. If the answer turns heavy, listen and keep your advice to yourself.
Is the work tiring for your body, your head or your patience?
Why ask it
Three different kinds of tired, and most jobs lean on one. The answer tells you what someone would need plenty of to last: strong knees, concentration or a long fuse. What they do to recover is worth a follow-up.
Which is harder: the work itself or the people around it?
Why ask it
Some will say the task is fine and the customers, managers or colleagues are the real job. Don't press for names. Asking what they have learned about handling people keeps the answer from turning into gossip.
What gets in the way of doing the job properly?
Why ask it
Listen for time, money, staffing, rules or equipment. This is the frustration of someone who cares about the result, and it shows how the workplace actually runs. Ask what they would fix first if it were up to them.
What do you get blamed for that is not really in your control?
Why ask it
The driver gets blamed for the traffic, the receptionist for the wait, the engineer for a deadline somebody else promised. It shows where the job sits between the people who decide and the people who complain. Keep it light: this is a grumble to share, not a grievance to investigate.
When something comes up that you have never seen before, what do you do?
Why ask it
It is easy to assume that experienced people simply know. Hearing that one of them looks it up, phones someone or says 'let me check' is reassuring to a beginner. Ask who they call.
Is there a risk to your health or safety that comes with the work?
Why ask it
It may be heavy lifting, chemicals, traffic or angry members of the public, or it may be a sore back from a chair and a screen. Which precautions have become routine tells you how seriously the workplace takes it. If they have been hurt at work themselves, let them decide how much to say.
When did you last have to say no to someone at work, and how did it go?
Why ask it
Refusing a customer, a boss or a colleague comes up in most jobs and is rarely part of the training. The story shows how much say they really have. If they can't recall ever saying no, that is an answer too.
What do you do on the days you don't feel like doing it?
Why ask it
Most people have those days, and admitting it does not mean they dislike the job. The answers are practical: start with the easiest task, lean on the routine, think of the person waiting on the result. They are worth borrowing.
Is there anything about the job you have never gotten used to?
Why ask it
The early alarm, the smell, the cold calls, the quiet of working alone: some things stay hard however long a person has done them. Naming one is not a complaint. What a newcomer wants to know is which discomforts wear off after the first year and which never do.
Which part of the job are you still learning?
Why ask it
It shows where the ceiling of the job is. If someone twenty years in is still working on estimating, or on explaining things clearly, that is the deep skill of the occupation. It is also a respectful question, since it assumes they are still improving.
Your line of work has a reputation. Which part of it is deserved?
Why ask it
Lawyers, mechanics, teachers, bankers, plumbers: most occupations come with a stock joke or a stock complaint, and the people inside them have heard it. Asking which part is fair shows you are not on the attack. Ask it with a smile, and not as your first question.
Does the job leave you enough time for family, friends and the rest of your life?
Why ask it
The plain version of the work-life balance question. Ask whether it has always been this way, since the balance can shift with a promotion, a new employer or children arriving. Treat a firm 'no' as a fact about their job at the moment. It is not a verdict on the whole occupation.
How can the people at home tell what kind of day you have had?
Why ask it
It asks what the work costs at home without prying. Family notice the late returns, the phone at dinner and the mood after a bad shift, sometimes before the worker does. If they live alone, or home is a sore subject, a short answer is your cue to move on.
How do you switch off when the day is over, or don't you?
Why ask it
The drive home, a change of clothes, a walk with the dog: listen for a ritual. If they say they never switch off, don't try to fix it. It may have arrived with one particular role, and they will know which.
What was your worst day in the job, if you don't mind telling it?
Why ask it
The words 'if you don't mind' matter, because in some occupations the worst day involved real harm. If they pick a funny disaster, enjoy it. If they go quiet, thank them and change the subject.
Money and prospects
I won't ask what you earn, but can someone live comfortably on this work around here?
Why ask it
Saying up front that you are not after their salary makes money safe to talk about. 'Comfortably' depends on local rents and the size of a household, so ask what it means to them. If they offer a figure of their own accord, thank them and keep it to yourself.
What is the usual pay range in your line of work, from a beginner to someone experienced?
Why ask it
A range for the occupation is easier to give than a personal figure, and it is what a report needs. Ask what moves someone from the bottom of the range to the top. Pay differs by region and employer and their numbers may be dated, so check them against current job ads or official wage data.
How much of the pay in your job depends on a good week: overtime, tips, commission or a bonus?
Why ask it
The headline wage can hide how the money is made. If a large share comes from overtime, commission or tips, the job pays for long hours and good weeks as much as for skill. Ask what a quiet month does to it.
Who decides what people in your job get paid?
Why ask it
It could be a published scale, a union agreement, a manager's discretion or whatever the customer will bear. That tells a newcomer whether pay is something you negotiate or something you look up. It differs by employer and country, so ask how it works where they are.
Where would you send a student to find honest pay figures for this job?
Why ask it
This asks for a source and spares them from quoting a number. They might point to a government wage table, a union rate card, a trade body survey or current job ads. Check that whatever they suggest covers your region, since pay for the same work varies by place.
Does pay rise mostly with years served, with extra qualifications or with changing employer?
Why ask it
Each answer points to a different plan: stay put where years count, study where qualifications count. If the raises come from moving, ask how often people in the field change employer.
What comes with the job besides the pay?
Why ask it
Health insurance, a pension, a vehicle, staff discounts, paid leave, tools, meals or housing can be worth a good deal and are easy to forget when comparing jobs. Benefits depend heavily on the employer and the country, so treat their list as one example.
Did you have to pay for your own training, tools or license, and does any of it get reimbursed?
Why ask it
The cost of getting in is part of the pay picture. Some employers fund everything, and some trades expect you to arrive with your own kit and renew a license out of pocket. Their own figure may be years out of date, so what matters is which of those costs still fall on a newcomer.
Is the work steady all year, or are there lean stretches?
Why ask it
Seasonal, contract and project work can pay well and still leave gaps. How people in the job cover those gaps, whether through a second line of work, savings or overtime in the busy season, is the part a newcomer needs to plan for.
Are there more people who want your job than there are openings, or is it the other way around?
Why ask it
A student's real question is whether a newcomer could get hired, and this asks it without making it personal. The answer depends on the region and the year, so treat it as one view from where they stand. If openings are scarce, ask what the people who do get in have in common.
Is there room to move up in your job, and what would the next rung be?
Why ask it
This maps the ladder: senior, supervisor, specialist, owner, or no ladder at all. Ask how long each step tends to take and whether it means changing employer or town. If there is nowhere to go, ask how people keep the work interesting over a long stretch.
Do the best people in your job get promoted out of it, or do they stay and keep doing the work?
Why ask it
In some fields the only way up is into management, which means giving up the part you were good at. In others a master of the craft stays hands-on for a whole career. If they have been offered the move up and turned it down, that story is worth hearing.
Would your qualifications and experience still count if you moved to another state or country?
Why ask it
Some skills travel anywhere, and some licenses stop at a border and have to be earned again. It matters to anyone who expects to move for family or a partner. Rules change, so take the answer as a prompt to check the current ones.
Can people in your job go out on their own, and do many of them?
Why ask it
Self-employment is a real option in some occupations and close to impossible in others. If they have done it, ask what surprised them about finding customers and getting paid. If they haven't, the reason they give, whether it is equipment, insurance or wanting steady pay, tells you what an employer is really providing.
What would you like to be doing in five or ten years?
Why ask it
It is about their plans, and it also shows what the occupation offers later on: a senior post, a business of their own, fewer hours, a move into teaching the work. 'The same thing, I hope' is a good sign about the job. If they would sooner not say in front of colleagues, let it go.
How has your job changed since you started?
Why ask it
New tools, new rules, different customers, more paperwork or less: someone a few years in has probably seen something shift. It shows which way the work is heading without asking them to predict anything. Ask which change made the job better and which they still grumble about.
Which part of your job could a machine or software be doing in ten years, and which part will still need a person?
Why ask it
Nobody can forecast this, so listen for the reasoning. People inside a job know which tasks are routine and which rely on judgment, trust or a pair of hands. The second half of the answer points to the skills worth building.
If the job vanished tomorrow, what else could you do with what you know?
Why ask it
It asks how far the skills transfer without asking how safe their own job is. A long list is encouraging for anyone thinking of entering the field. If the question clearly worries them, lighten it by asking what they would secretly like to try.
If an easier job paid the same, would you take it?
Why ask it
This separates the money from everything else in one move. A quick no means the work gives them something beyond the wage, so ask what. A quick yes is honest too, and deserves a laugh and no judgment.
Advice
What do you know now that you wish you had known when you started?
Why ask it
Hindsight is easy to be honest about, because nobody is being blamed. Expect something practical: how long the training really takes, how much selling is involved, how the first two years pay. Whatever it is, a newcomer can go and find it out before committing.
What skills does a person need to do your job well?
Why ask it
Expect a list that mixes things that are taught, like a technique or a piece of software, with things that are not, like staying calm or explaining clearly. Ask which one took them longest to get good at. That is likely the skill that separates a beginner from someone trusted with the work.
What could someone try for a week to find out whether this work would suit them?
Why ask it
The useful answers are small tests: a volunteer shift, a weekend project, a day spent on the dullest task in the job. If they can't think of one, ask which part of the work puts newcomers off fastest.
What part-time or summer job is the best preparation for yours?
Why ask it
Aimed at students, who can act on the answer this year. It is often something unglamorous, like waiting tables or laboring, picked for the patience or stamina it builds and not for anything on the job description.
Which counts for more in your job: what you know, how fast you work, or how you get along with people?
Why ask it
A forced choice, for when the skills question has produced a long list. Whichever they pick, ask for a time it made the difference, and whether it can be taught or has to be there already.
What habit makes someone good at your job, whatever their talent?
Why ask it
Habits can be copied, which makes this more useful than asking about natural ability. Writing everything down, checking twice and calling people back the same day are the sort of thing you'll hear. Most were learned the hard way, and that story is worth having too.
What mistake do you see beginners make most often?
Why ask it
Anyone who has watched new people arrive will have an answer ready. Notice whether it is about skill or about attitude and pace: rushing, not asking, pretending to understand. Ask whether they made the same mistake themselves.
What would you want a new colleague to know on their first morning?
Why ask it
This brings out the unwritten rules: who to ask, what never to touch, where the real information lives. It is practical and friendly, and it suits a guest speaker with only a minute left.
What is the best thing anyone told you about working life, and did you listen?
Why ask it
The second half is the interesting part. Advice ignored and later regretted makes a better story than advice followed, and it tells you they are being straight with you.
What advice do people in your field always give that you think is wrong?
Why ask it
Most trades have their stock lines. Someone willing to disagree with one has thought about their work, and the reasons will be specific to it. If they agree with all the usual advice, ask which piece is hardest to follow.
What is worth being fussy about in your job, and what is fine to let slide?
Why ask it
Knowing where care matters is a large part of experience. A beginner who treats everything as equally important wears out fast. Their answer is a shortcut to the two or three things that cannot be done badly.
What have you had to get better at as a person to do this job?
Why ask it
Patience, speaking up, staying calm, keeping quiet: jobs change people. This is a good question for a relative, because the family may have noticed the change too and can say so.
What has the job taught you that is useful outside work?
Why ask it
Think of the nurse who stays calm in a family crisis, the carpenter who can't walk past a crooked shelf, the accountant who reads the small print. It connects the job to the person, and it is light enough for a dinner table.
What did you put off too long: asking for a raise, changing employer, getting a qualification?
Why ask it
Narrower than asking about regrets, and easier to answer because the examples are ordinary. Whatever they name is something a beginner can do on time. Don't dig into why they waited unless they offer it.
If you were starting over, would you choose the same career, and what would you do differently?
Why ask it
A yes with one change attached is the most useful answer, because the change tends to be specific: train sooner, specialize, pick a different first employer. If it is a no, do not treat it as a confession. People can be good at work they would not pick twice, and it helps to understand why.
Would you be glad if your own child, or a niece or nephew, went into this work?
Why ask it
It asks for a recommendation with something at stake, which is harder to answer politely than 'do you like your job'. A pause before the reply is information. If the answer is no, ask what would have to be different.
What do you wish people asked about your job instead of 'so what do you do'?
Why ask it
Hand them the choice of topic near the end. Whatever they pick is the thing they most wanted to say, and you can simply ask it back to them. It also covers any gap in your own list.
If I only write down one thing about your job, what should it be?
Why ask it
A closer for a student with an assignment or a class at a career day. It forces a single sentence, which is likely to be the most quotable line of the conversation. Read it back to check you have it right.
How to ask about someone's job without turning it into an interview
Practical guidance for the conversation itself
Pick questions for the occasion
For a school or career assignment
Read the assignment sheet first and mark what it requires you to find out. Then choose eight to ten questions: the five under Start here cover what most worksheets want, so add at least one from each of the other groups and put the required ones near the top in case time runs short. If the sheet asks about training or pay, the questions on what education the job needs, the usual pay range and where to find pay figures cover it. Ask before you start whether you may take notes and quote them, and get the spelling of their name and exact job title.
For a career day or a guest speaker
You will probably get one question, so make it short and give it a concrete answer: the one tool they would keep, the first day, the uniform. In front of a room, use the money questions that ask about the usual range, who sets the pay or where to find figures. Asking a speaker what they earn puts them on the spot with an audience watching.
For a parent, grandparent or family friend
Start in How they got there and let the stories run. Relatives often have whole working lives the family has never heard about, including jobs that no longer exist. If they are willing, record it or write it up afterwards. You are unlikely to get the same telling twice.
For dinner or small talk
One or two from The day to day is plenty, and offer something about your own work in return. Leave The hard parts alone unless they open the door themselves. Someone who has just escaped the office for the evening may not want to go back there over dessert.
Asking about money politely
Ask about the job, not the person
Who sets the rate, how much of it is overtime or tips, what comes with the job and where to look up figures are all questions about the occupation. None of them asks what is in this person's bank account. That difference is what makes the subject comfortable, and it still gets a student the facts a report needs.
Let them decide how far to go
Begin with the question that says outright you are not asking what they earn. Some people will then tell you anyway, and some will stay general. Both are fine. If they do share a number, do not repeat it to others or print it in an assignment without asking.
Check any figure before you rely on it
One person's pay is one example from one employer in one place, at one level of experience. Before a figure goes into a report or a decision, compare it with official wage data or current job ads for your own region. Benefits, taxes and living costs differ enough between places that the same number can mean very different things.
Getting real answers
Ask for a particular day
Asking about 'a typical day' is the natural way in, but it gets a summary, and summaries are forgettable. 'The last time', 'your first day' and 'your worst day' get stories with people and details in them. If an answer stays general, ask for an example and wait.
Follow up once before moving on
The second question is usually where the good material is. 'What happened then?', 'How did you learn that?' and 'Is that normal?' are enough. A list of ten questions asked one after another with no follow-up feels like a form being filled in.
Explain why you are asking
A sentence at the start helps: it is for a class, you are thinking about a similar path, or you have always wondered what they do all day. People answer more freely when they know what the answers are for. It also tells them how technical to be.
Write down their words
For an assignment, one sentence in their exact words is worth more than a page of your paraphrase. Note the phrases that sound like them, and read any quote back before you leave. If you are not taking notes, write down the three things you remember as soon as the conversation ends.
Mistakes to avoid
Asking what you could have looked up
What the occupation is, what the employer does and what the job title means in general can be found in five minutes beforehand. Spend their time on what only they can tell you: what it is like, how they got in, what they would do differently.
Pressing on a sore spot
Layoffs, a bad employer, an injury or a career that did not go to plan can sit behind an innocent question. A short answer, a change of tone or a joke that closes the subject all mean the same thing. Thank them and move to a lighter group.
Hiding what you really want
If you are hoping for an introduction, an internship or a job, say so at the start and let them decide whether they can help. Curiosity that turns into a request at the end makes the whole conversation feel like a setup.
Taking one person as the whole occupation
You have heard about one person's version of the job in one workplace at one point in their career. Someone in the same occupation at a different employer, or twenty years younger, may describe something quite different. If a decision depends on it, talk to a second person.
Leaving without thanks
Say what you learned, not only that you are grateful. For a student, a short note afterwards that mentions one specific thing they said is the right close, and it makes them more willing to say yes to the next person who asks.