20 Questions

Questions to Ask Your Cousin's Boyfriend

Friendly questions that help you get to know your cousin's partner, build rapport, and ensure they're a good fit for your family while keeping the conversation light and welcoming.

1

How did you and [cousin's name] meet?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Opens up the conversation with their relationship story, which is usually a safe and interesting topic that shows you care about their connection.

2

What do you do for work, and do you enjoy it?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Reveals their career interests and work-life balance while being a standard getting-to-know-you question that's easy to answer.

3

What are your hobbies or interests outside of work?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Shows you're interested in them as a person and helps you find common ground or interesting topics to discuss.

4

Where did you grow up, and what was it like there?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Reveals their background and gives you insight into their upbringing and values while being a natural conversation starter.

5

What's your family like?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Shows you're interested in their family dynamics and helps you understand their background and values.

6

How do you like to spend your weekends?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Reveals their lifestyle and interests while being a light, easy question that shows you're interested in their daily life.

7

What's the best vacation you've ever taken?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Opens up conversation about travel and experiences while being a fun, positive topic that reveals their interests and values.

8

Do you have any pets, or are you a pet person?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Reveals their lifestyle preferences and can be a fun, light topic that shows you're interested in their daily life.

9

What kind of music, movies, or books do you enjoy?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Helps you find common interests and cultural preferences while being an easy way to connect over shared tastes.

10

What's something you're really passionate about?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Reveals what drives them and shows you're interested in understanding what makes them tick as a person.

11

How do you like to celebrate holidays or special occasions?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Shows you're thinking about family traditions and helps you understand their approach to important moments.

12

What's the most interesting place you've ever been?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Opens up conversation about travel and experiences while being a positive, engaging topic that reveals their interests.

13

Do you have any siblings, and what are they like?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Reveals their family dynamics and helps you understand their relationships with family members.

14

What's something you're really good at or proud of?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Shows you're interested in their strengths and achievements while being a positive way to learn about their capabilities.

15

How do you like to relax after a long day?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Reveals their self-care habits and lifestyle preferences while being a light, personal question.

16

What's the best meal you've ever had?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Opens up conversation about food and experiences while being a fun, light topic that can reveal their tastes and interests.

17

Do you have any favorite sports or activities you like to watch or participate in?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Reveals their interests and can help you find common ground while being an easy topic to discuss.

18

What's something you've always wanted to try or learn?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Shows you're interested in their goals and dreams while being a positive, forward-looking question.

19

How do you like to spend time with friends?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Reveals their social preferences and helps you understand how they like to connect with others.

20

What's the best advice you've ever received?

Click to see why this works

Why this works

Shows you're interested in their values and wisdom while being a thoughtful question that can reveal their character.

Best Practices for Getting to Know Your Cousin's Partner

Expert tips and techniques for getting the most out of these questions.

Best Practices

Be Warm and Welcoming

Make them feel comfortable and included in family gatherings. Your cousin chose them, so show respect for their choice while getting to know them.

Find Common Ground

Look for shared interests, experiences, or values that can help you connect and build a positive relationship with them.

Respect Boundaries

Don't ask overly personal questions or pry into their relationship. Focus on getting to know them as a person, not as your cousin's partner.

Question Sequences

The Getting-to-Know-You Sequence

1
Start with: "How did you and [cousin's name] meet?"
2
Follow with: "What do you do for work, and do you enjoy it?"
3
Deepen with: "What are your hobbies or interests outside of work?"

The Family Connection Sequence

1
Start with: "What's your family like?"
2
Follow with: "Do you have any siblings, and what are they like?"
3
Deepen with: "How do you like to celebrate holidays or special occasions?"

Common Pitfalls

Don't Interrogate Them

Avoid firing off question after question. Make it a natural conversation with give and take, not an interview.

Avoid Personal or Intimate Questions

Don't ask about their relationship with your cousin, their finances, or other personal matters. Keep it light and friendly.

Don't Compare Them to Exes

Avoid mentioning your cousin's previous partners or making comparisons. Focus on getting to know them as they are now.

Conversation Templates

The Interest Explorer

1
Step 1: Start with: "What are your hobbies or interests outside of work?"
2
Step 2: Follow with: "What's something you're really passionate about?"
3
Step 3: Deepen with: "What's something you've always wanted to try or learn?"

The Experience Sharer

1
Step 1: Start with: "What's the best vacation you've ever taken?"
2
Step 2: Follow with: "What's the most interesting place you've ever been?"
3
Step 3: Deepen with: "What's the best meal you've ever had?"

Further Reading

"The Art of Conversation" by Catherine Blyth
"How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie
"The Charisma Myth" by Olivia Fox Cabane

Find Your Perfect Questions

Search our collection of thoughtful questions for any conversation or situation