Questions to Ask Yourself About God's Purpose for You
Questions to ask yourself about God's purpose for you, written for a Christian working alone with a notebook: on a quiet morning, on retreat, or with a job offer or a house move waiting for an answer. The six groups run in the order the thinking tends to go, from where you already stand, through what you are good at and what troubles you, what the Bible and honest friends have told you, and which doors are really open, to your motives and one step for this week. Plenty of people who work through them end up with their present life to live more faithfully and no new assignment, and the list treats that as a real answer.
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The questions
Each question, and why to ask it
Starting point
What do I already know God asks of every Christian, and how am I doing with that part?
Why ask it
Most of what scripture calls God's will is addressed to everyone: love God, love your neighbor, do justice, give thanks. Write down the commands you are sure of before you turn to the specific question, since a personal calling rarely skips them.
What decision or restlessness sent me looking for my purpose right now?
Why ask it
Name the trigger in one sentence: a job offer, a move, a birthday, a sermon, a dull year. A deadline needs a different kind of answer from a vague ache, and knowing which one you have tells you how much of this page you need.
Am I asking what to do with my whole life, or what to do next?
Why ask it
The whole-life version is rarely settled in one sitting, and waiting for it can stall the smaller answer that is available today. If you can only answer honestly for the coming year, write that and treat it as enough to act on.
When I picture God's purpose for me, do I picture one hidden assignment I could miss?
Why ask it
Plenty of Christians carry a blueprint in their heads with one right job, one right city and one right spouse, and it makes every choice frightening. Ask where you got that picture, and whether the passages you would quote for it say as much as you remember.
Where has God already put me: which people, which work, which place?
Why ask it
List the roles you did not have to go looking for: son or daughter, parent, employee, neighbor, church member. Whatever else turns up, these are already assigned, and a purpose that neglects all of them deserves a second look.
Am I after God himself, or mostly after directions from him?
Why ask it
It is possible to want the map far more than the one who drew it. Look at what your prayers this month have been about: if nearly all of them asked for an answer on this one decision, give a week to praise and confession before you come back to it.
Looking back over the last ten years, where can I see I was being led even though I couldn't tell then?
Why ask it
Guidance is often easier to read backward than forward. Sketch a rough timeline and mark the turns you did not plan, because the way God has led you before is a better pattern to expect than the way he led the speaker at a conference.
What do I believe God thinks of me before I have accomplished anything?
Why ask it
If the true answer is that you have to earn your place, the search for purpose becomes a search for worth, and no assignment will be large enough. Take that to the gospel first; the other questions weigh less once it is answered.
Gifts and burdens
What do I do well that helps other people, including things that feel too ordinary to count?
Why ask it
Administration, giving and mercy sit in the New Testament gift lists right beside teaching and leading, and 1 Peter 4 speaks of hospitality in the same breath as gifts. If your list holds only the up-front abilities, add the organizing, the hosting and the hospital visits nobody claps for.
What have other people thanked me for more than once?
Why ask it
Repeated thanks is evidence you did not produce yourself. Scroll back through messages and old cards if memory fails, and look for the thing people mention that you barely remember doing.
What work makes me lose track of time, and what work drains me even when I do it well?
Why ask it
Make two columns. The second often holds a skill you built out of duty, and people will keep asking you for it. That is no reason to stop, only a reason not to rest a whole calling on it.
What have I wanted to do for years that keeps coming back however often I set it down?
Why ask it
A wish that has outlasted three jobs and two cities is not the same thing as this month's enthusiasm. Date it as best you can and record what you did each time it surfaced, because the pattern of starting and stopping usually tells you whether fear, timing or good sense has been holding it back.
What need or injustice bothers me more than it seems to bother the people around me?
Why ask it
A burden tends to show up as an irritation that will not leave: you keep noticing the lonely widower, the kids with nowhere to go after school, the church budget nobody understands. Write down the one you have raised in conversation three times this year.
Whose suffering do I understand from the inside because I have been through it?
Why ask it
Paul writes of comforting others with the comfort we ourselves received (2 Corinthians 1:4). Name the experience plainly, then ask whether you are far enough through it to help someone without being pulled back under.
If money and other people's opinions were no factor, how would I spend a normal Tuesday?
Why ask it
Ask about a Tuesday and not a dream, because dreams leave out the daily work. If the day you describe could already be arranged for one evening a week, start with that evening and see what it teaches you.
What have I been trained or paid to do that I have never thought of as ministry?
Why ask it
Bookkeeping, nursing, plumbing and software are skills a church, a neighbor or a mission agency may be short of. Paul tells workers to do their jobs as for the Lord (Colossians 3:23), so the job counts before any volunteer use of it does.
Where have I served and seen real good come of it, and where did effort produce very little?
Why ask it
Fruit is slow evidence, so look across years and not weeks. Go carefully with the second half: one hard season does not show you were in the wrong place, but a long strain with nothing to show for it is worth taking to someone who watched it happen.
What limits do I have (health, family, money, temperament), and what do they rule out or point toward?
Why ask it
Limits belong to how you were made and where you were placed, so they are information in the same way gifts are. A caregiver with two free hours a week is not failing at purpose. Work out what faithfulness looks like inside those two hours.
Scripture and counsel
Which passages do I keep coming back to, and what do they say in context?
Why ask it
Read the whole chapter around your favorite verse. Jeremiah 29:11, for one, was written to a people in exile who were told to build houses and expect seventy years there, which changes what it promises somebody choosing between two jobs.
Is there anything in the path I'm considering that scripture plainly forbids or plainly commands?
Why ask it
This is the quickest filter on the page. A plan that needs dishonesty, a broken vow or the neglect of people in your care can be put down without any further prayer about open doors, and a plain command needs no special sign.
What has my regular Bible reading been pressing on me, apart from the verses I went looking for?
Why ask it
Hunting for a verse to back a plan is one thing, and being interrupted by a passage you were only reading in course is another. If you have no regular reading to draw on, that is your answer for now: begin one before you ask for specific direction.
Who knows me well enough to tell me the truth, and what have they said about where I fit?
Why ask it
Name two or three: a pastor, a spouse, an older friend who has seen you under pressure. If you have never asked them outright, ask this week, and word it as "Where have you seen me do good?" so they have something concrete to answer.
What has someone I trust told me that I didn't want to hear?
Why ask it
Unwelcome counsel is the kind most worth rereading. Write the sentence the way they said it, then decide whether you set it aside because it was wrong or because it was inconvenient.
Have I only asked people I knew would agree with me?
Why ask it
Count your advisers and note how each one answered. If every one said yes, find a blunt person with nothing to gain from your decision before you treat the agreement as confirmation.
What does my church need that I could do, and has anyone there asked me to do something?
Why ask it
In Acts, Barnabas and Saul are sent out by the church at Antioch, and the seven who serve the widows are chosen by the congregation. An invitation you turned down, or a gap you notice every Sunday, belongs in this answer.
When I pray about this and then stay quiet, what keeps returning?
Why ask it
Add a dated line to your journal each time you pray about it, for several weeks. A thought that comes back across different moods carries more weight than one strong feeling on the last night of a retreat, and either still has to be tested against scripture and against people who know you.
Do I have peace about this, and can I tell peace from relief?
Why ask it
Calm after deciding to stay may be relief at dodging the risk, and unease about going may be nothing more than nerves. Check the feeling again a week later, on a bad day, and give it a vote alongside scripture and counsel, never the only one.
Doors
What opportunities are in front of me right now that I didn't force open?
Why ask it
List what is on offer, not what you wish were. An open door is an option and not an order: Paul mentions a wide door in Ephesus in the same breath as many adversaries (1 Corinthians 16:9), so open and easy are not the same thing.
Where can I see God already at work near me, and could I join in?
Why ask it
Look for what is growing without you: a neighbor's Bible study, a food pantry short of drivers, a coworker who keeps asking about your faith. Joining something already under way is a smaller step than founding something, and it shows quickly whether you fit.
Which doors have closed, and have I accepted that or am I still pushing?
Why ask it
In Acts 16 Paul is kept out of two regions before the way into Macedonia opens. Put a date beside each closed door and mark the ones you are still knocking on. Persistence is sometimes right, so ask what would have to change for you to stop.
Is this door closed, or is it only hard?
Why ask it
Delay, difficulty and a single rejection letter are not the same as a no. Sort the obstacle into one of two kinds: something you could work through with time and help, or something outside your power altogether, such as a position that no longer exists.
What would I have to leave or neglect in order to walk through this door?
Why ask it
Every yes costs a no somewhere: evenings with your children, a small group that counts on you, a parent who lives ten minutes away. When the cost lands mostly on other people, they should hear about it from you before you decide.
Am I waiting for a sign when I already have enough to decide?
Why ask it
Gideon laid out his fleece after he had already been told what to do. If you have the facts, have prayed and have heard from wise people, the request for one more confirmation may be fear in religious clothes. Set a date by which you will choose.
If both options are good and permitted, which would I choose, and can I trust God with that choice?
Why ask it
Many crossroads lie between two faithful paths, and you may be free to take either. Say aloud which one you would pick if you believed that, and notice whether relief or dread arrives with the answer.
What do my circumstances make possible this year that they won't in five?
Why ask it
Seasons shut on their own: no children yet, children still at home, good health, a parent still living, savings that would cover a pay cut. Answering turns a vague calling into a timed one, and it often reorders the list of open doors.
Motives
If nobody ever knew I did this, would I still want to do it?
Why ask it
Picture the work with no title, no announcement and nothing posted about it. A desire that survives is probably about the work. One that fades has shown you what you were after, which is useful to know and no cause for shame.
What am I afraid will happen if I say yes, and what am I afraid of if I say no?
Why ask it
Put the two lists side by side. Fears about yes are often failure and money, and fears about no are often regret and what people will think. Whichever column runs longer has probably been doing the steering.
Am I running toward something or away from something?
Why ask it
A call to the mission field that arrives the same month as a bad performance review deserves a slower look, though the timing alone does not make it false. Ask whether you would still want the new thing if the old thing turned pleasant again.
What do I already suspect God wants from me that I have been putting off?
Why ask it
Jonah knew exactly where he had been sent. If an answer came to mind the instant you read the question, write it down before you start arguing with it, and count how long you have known.
Whose expectations am I carrying into this decision, and are they God's or theirs?
Why ask it
A parent's hopes, a pastor's praise and a friend group's idea of a serious Christian all lean on choices like this. Naming the person usually loosens the grip, and now and then it shows the path was theirs all along.
How much do money, comfort and status weigh in this, and have I admitted that weight?
Why ask it
Needing to pay rent is no sin, and providing for a household is itself commanded. The trouble comes from the motive you have not admitted. Give each factor a rough share out of a hundred so you can see it, then pray about the number you wrote.
Whose calling do I envy, and what exactly do I want from their life?
Why ask it
Separate the person from the thing: it may be the teaching you want, or the travel, the freedom, the audience. The thing is a clue to your own desires and can often be had in a smaller form where you are, while that person's whole path was never offered to you.
What am I telling God I can't do, and is that humility or refusal?
Why ask it
At the burning bush Moses raised one objection after another, and the last was simply to send someone else. Write your own reasons out, then mark which are facts a friend would confirm and which are that final objection in different words.
At the end of my life, what do I hope God will say about how I spent it?
Why ask it
In the parable of the talents the two servants who are praised hear the same words, though one was handed five talents and the other two (Matthew 25). The commendation is for faithfulness with what each was given, so answer in those terms and leave the size of the result out of it.
Next step
What is one thing I'm fairly sure I should do in the next seven days?
Why ask it
Keep it small enough to finish: make the phone call, send the application, apologize, sign up to serve once. Psalm 119:105 calls God's word a lamp to the feet, which is light enough for the next stride and seldom for the whole road.
What am I already responsible for that I could do more faithfully before I take on anything new?
Why ask it
Faithful in little, faithful in much (Luke 16:10) is a fair test for a big plan. If what comes up is a neglected marriage, a half-done job or an unpaid debt, that is this month's calling and the larger one can wait behind it.
What would I need to learn, save or finish before the bigger step is wise?
Why ask it
Turn the answer into a list with rough dates: a course, six months of expenses, a visa, a long talk with your spouse. Training requirements and costs differ from one church, agency and country to the next, so ask the people involved how it works for them.
Who will I tell, so that somebody asks me a month from now what I did?
Why ask it
Choose a person and a date, and give them the specific step, not the general hope. A resolution made alone at a retreat is easy to lose in the first busy week home, and one friend who will ask is often enough to keep it alive.
What small trial could I run before I commit: a short trip, a class, three months of volunteering?
Why ask it
A trial swaps imagination for evidence. Decide beforehand what you are watching for (whether the work suits you, whether others see good come of it, whether your family can carry it) so the trial answers a question and is not just an experience.
What will I do if I take the step and it goes badly?
Why ask it
Settle now that a failed attempt would not prove you misheard, and would not be wasted. Write what you would say to a friend in that spot and keep the page, because you may need to read it back to yourself.
If no further direction comes, what would faithfulness look like right where I am for the next year?
Why ask it
Many people who pray about purpose end up here, and it is not a consolation prize. Describe one ordinary week done well: the work, the people, the prayer, the giving. Then live that week while you wait.
When will I sit down with these questions again?
Why ask it
Put a date on the calendar three or six months out and keep today's pages. Old answers read next to new ones show what has stayed constant, and the constant things are usually the ones to build on.
Working through the questions on your own
Practical guidance for the conversation itself
Setting up the time
Paper, a Bible and a date at the top
Write the answers out by hand if you can, with the date and the decision you are facing as the first line. Have a Bible open beside the notebook, since several questions send you to read a chapter and not to recall a verse. Leave the phone in another room for the hour.
One group per sitting
The six groups are six sittings, not one. Starting point and Gifts and burdens are the slowest and deserve a morning each. Motives is the easiest group to skip and can change the answer more than any other, so do not save it for a tired evening.
On a retreat
A day or a weekend away is long enough for the first four groups. Hold Motives and Next step until you are home again and the mood of the place has worn off, then see whether what you wrote on the hillside still reads true at the kitchen table.
When there is a deadline
With a job offer or a lease that has to be answered by Friday, do a short version: the question about what scripture plainly forbids or commands, the one about who will tell you the truth, the one about what you would have to leave, the two on fear and on running away, and the one-year question near the end of the list. Then decide, and say so to the person you named.
Weighing what you wrote
What is commanded and what is left open
Christians have long distinguished between what God asks of every believer, which is written down, and where a particular person should live and work, which mostly is not. The first is certain and already covers a large part of any life. The second is where these questions help, and where a mistake is far less costly than fear suggests.
Look for agreement, not one loud signal
No single answer on your pages settles the matter. Give weight to the direction where scripture, the people who know you, your gifts, your circumstances and what returns in prayer line up. Where they pull apart, the disagreement is the thing to pray about and to take to a pastor.
Your church may put this differently
Traditions do not all describe guidance the same way. Some expect direct promptings from the Holy Spirit and others lean on wisdom, counsel and the plain reading of scripture, and words like calling and vocation carry different freight from one to the next. Ask a pastor or an elder how your own church understands it and read your answers in that light.
Ordinary work counts
A page like this can leave the impression that purpose means ministry, missions or a change of career. For most Christians it has meant doing their present work honestly, raising children, caring for parents and serving a local church. If that is where your answers land, you have not come away empty-handed.
Where discernment goes wrong
Waiting for certainty
Years can pass while someone asks for a level of assurance that nobody in scripture is promised before obeying. If the next step is permitted, wise as far as you can see and supported by people you trust, the missing feeling of certainty is not a reason to stand still.
Reading ease as yes and trouble as no
Circumstances are one witness among several. Jonah found a ship ready and waiting when he ran the wrong way, and Paul met opposition in nearly every city he was sent to. Let the Doors group inform the decision without deciding it alone.
Borrowing someone else's calling
A moving testimony, a biography or a gifted friend can make their path feel like the standard one. Admiration is worth noting, but check it against the Gifts and burdens answers, which describe you and not them.
Deciding entirely alone
The questions are private, and the decision should not be. A sense of call that no one who knows you can recognize, or that you are reluctant to say aloud to a spouse or a pastor, needs more testing before it needs a resignation letter.
After you have answered
Reread and underline what repeats
Wait a day, then read everything through with a pen. The same person, need or place will often turn up under three or four different questions. Copy those repeats onto a single page, because that page is the real result of the exercise.
Take the single page to one person
Show it to the adviser you named under Scripture and counsel and ask two things: does this sound like me, and what have I left out? Their additions are usually about your blind spots, which no amount of journaling alone will reach.
Do the smallest clear thing first
Act on the seven-day step before you plan the five-year one. What you learn by doing it will change the bigger plan anyway, and a habit of acting on the light you have is the best preparation for receiving more.
If the questions stir up something heavier
Now and then this kind of reflection uncovers a lasting sense of worthlessness or hopelessness, and that is more than a decision problem. Put the notebook down and talk to a pastor, a counselor or a doctor you trust. The question of purpose will keep until you have help with that.