Stay Interview Questions
Stay interview questions for a manager to ask an employee they want to keep, while that person is still content and not yet looking elsewhere. The list follows the order of the conversation: what keeps you here, the work, manager and team, growth, why you might leave, and the follow up. The notes say what a guarded answer sounds like, what to ask next and what you owe the person afterward, and the guide covers setting up the meeting, acting on what you hear, and adapting the questions for nurses, teachers and managers.
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The questions
Each question, and why to ask it
What keeps you here
What do you look forward to when you start work each day?
Why ask it
An easy one to open on, since nobody has to criticize anything to answer it. The safe reply is 'the people'; ask which people, and what they were working on together last week. Whatever gets named is the thing to protect the next time roles or schedules are reshuffled.
What keeps you working here?
Why ask it
Ask it plainly and then wait. The first reason is usually the respectable one, so keep saying 'what else?' until the list runs out, and write the reasons down in their words. Those are the terms this person is staying on, and a change that breaks one of them deserves a conversation before it happens.
What would you miss most if you left tomorrow?
Why ask it
Picturing the last day gets a more specific answer than asking what they like. A list that is all people and no work means the tie is to colleagues who could move on too. You raised the idea of going, so stay relaxed when they take it seriously.
What does a good day at work look like for you, and when was the last one?
Why ask it
The second half carries the weight: a good day last week is reassuring, and one that takes effort to recall tells you they have become rare. Afterward, work out what was different about that day, such as who was on, what went uninterrupted or which kind of task filled it, and whether you can arrange more like it.
If a friend asked whether they should apply here, what would you tell them?
Why ask it
Listen for the 'but', as in 'it's great, but the hours', because what follows it is the honest part. A recommendation with no detail is politeness, so ask what they would warn the friend about first, and which team they would steer the friend toward.
What made you take this job, and how much of that is still true?
Why ask it
The gap between the job as described and the job as lived rarely comes up unless someone asks. Find out which part has changed most since they started. Anything promised at hiring that has lapsed needs an answer from you, whether or not it can be restored.
Which part of your job would you fight to keep if your role were redesigned?
Why ask it
Far more useful to know before a reorganization than after one. 'I'd be fine with anything' can be flexibility, or it can mean nothing here has a hold on them, and the way to tell is to ask which task they would pick first if the choice were theirs.
Who here makes your work better, and what do they do?
Why ask it
You are hoping for a name and a specific habit, because that tells you whose departure would loosen this person's hold on the job too. 'The whole team' usually means they would rather not rank colleagues, which is fair; ask about a time someone helped them recently instead.
When were you last proud to tell someone where you work or what you do?
Why ask it
Pride in the employer and pride in the craft are different things, and the answer shows which one this person has. A long silence is information, not rudeness. Leave it unrepaired in the room; afterward, note which kind of pride was missing and what has changed since it was there.
What is better here than at other places you have worked?
Why ask it
Any outside offer will be weighed against what they name, which makes it the advantage to defend when budgets are cut. Someone in a first job has nothing to compare, so ask what friends in similar work envy about theirs.
The work
Which parts of your job give you energy, and which drain it?
Why ask it
Ask for one of each from the past week so the answer stays concrete. People offer the energizing half readily and then stop, so say that every job has a draining part and you want to hear theirs. You cannot remove every drain, but moving one task off their week is often possible and will be noticed.
What are you doing now that you would like to do more of?
Why ask it
Few requests in a stay interview are this easy to grant, so treat the answer as a task for yourself: come back within a month with more of that work or a straight account of why not. A blank can be helped along by naming three parts of their job and asking them to rank them.
Which task would you drop if nobody would mind?
Why ask it
The first choice tends to be trivial, a weekly report or a form. Accept it and ask for a second, which is usually the real irritant. A task that has to stay needs its reason said aloud, meaning who depends on it, because work that seems pointless wears on people more than work that is hard.
What talent of yours are we not making use of?
Why ask it
Modesty gets in the way here, and 'none' often means that naming a talent felt like boasting. Prompt with something you have watched them do well outside their duties, then find one piece of work in the next quarter that calls for it.
How manageable is your workload right now, and how long has it been that way?
Why ask it
The duration is the point: a hard month is a deadline, a hard year is the job. 'It's busy everywhere' is what people say once they no longer expect anything to change. If the load is too heavy, agree on one thing that comes off or waits, and be the one who tells whoever was expecting it.
What gets in the way of doing your best work?
Why ask it
Expect tools, approvals, interruptions or shifting priorities, and expect a system to get the blame before any person does. Ask what the obstacle looked like the last time it cost them an afternoon. Then clear the one you control quickly, because a small fix this week counts for more than a large one promised.
Do you have the equipment, supplies and staffing you need to do the job properly?
Why ask it
On a hospital unit, in a classroom or on a shop floor this can be the whole conversation. A shortage the person has stopped reporting is one they no longer expect help with. Sort the list aloud: what you can get, what you will ask for, and what is not coming.
How much say do you have over how you do your work, and is it enough?
Why ask it
Lack of freedom is hard to complain about directly, so listen for stories of being checked, overruled or made to ask permission. 'It's fine', followed by one of those stories, is not fine. Name one decision that is theirs to make from now on, and then leave it alone.
Does your schedule work for the rest of your life?
Why ask it
For anyone on shifts or a fixed class schedule, this may matter more than anything else you ask. The reason behind a request is theirs to keep, since it may involve health or family, so ask only what pattern would work and say plainly what you can and cannot offer.
What part of your work do you think matters most, and do the people above you seem to agree?
Why ask it
When the two halves differ, the person is putting effort into something they believe goes unseen. An answer that recites the team's official goals has dodged the question, so ask what they would be sorry to see cut. Then say where you have spoken up for the work they named, or say plainly that the organization values it less than they do; they deserve to know which.
How clear are your priorities right now, and what happens when two of them collide?
Why ask it
Most people can list their priorities. The second half is where trouble shows, in a story about two bosses, two deadlines or a rule that contradicts a target. Someone who has been deciding alone and hoping needs the order you would use, in writing when more than one person hands them work.
If you could change one thing about your job tomorrow, what would it be?
Why ask it
Limiting it to one makes the person choose, and the choice shows the priority. 'Nothing comes to mind' deserves a few seconds of quiet and an offer to return to it at the end. Anything within your power should be done before you next meet, and they should hear that it happened because they said so.
Manager and team
As your manager, what should I do more of, and what should I do less of?
Why ask it
More and less are easier words than good and bad, and asking for both halves makes the second one sayable. If all you hear is 'you're doing great', name a habit of your own that you suspect is a nuisance and ask whether you are right. Thank them, skip the explanation, and change one thing they will be able to see.
How do you like to be recognized when you have done good work?
Why ask it
Some people want it said in front of the team, some prefer a private word or a note, and a few want only the next interesting assignment. Guess wrong and praise feels like a penalty. Keep a note of the answer and use it the next time they earn it.
When did you last feel properly thanked for something here?
Why ask it
An occasion that comes to mind quickly is a good sign. A long reach back calls for a short apology and one more question: what was the most recent piece of work that nobody thanked them for? Thank them for it then and there, in specific terms.
Do you get enough feedback from me to know how you are doing?
Why ask it
The people you worry about least tend to hear from you least, and they can read the silence as indifference. 'I assume no news is good news' is a warning dressed as reassurance. Ask whether they want feedback more often, in writing or in person, and then keep to it.
Is there anything you have stopped bringing to me because it did not seem worth it?
Why ask it
You are asking about something that leaves no trace: the request not made, the problem quietly worked around. Offer an example of a time you brushed something aside, ask whether there were others, and pick up whatever they name as though it had been raised today.
What have I said I would do for you and not done?
Why ask it
Small broken promises stick: the training course, the introduction, the second monitor. Kindness will get you a 'nothing', so go through your own notes before the meeting and bring one lapsed promise yourself, with a new date attached.
How well do you think I understand what your day involves?
Why ask it
A manager who misjudges the work also misjudges the load and the credit. Ask what would surprise you if you shadowed them for a shift, and then do the shadowing, even for an hour.
Do you hear about decisions that affect your work early enough to have a say?
Why ask it
The usual complaint is less about the decision than about learning of it from a colleague or a group email. Ask for the last change that reached them secondhand. You cannot always consult, but you can undertake to tell them yourself before a change to their schedule, their assignments or their team is announced.
What was the last suggestion you made here, and how far did it get?
Why ask it
An idea that was adopted, or turned down with a reason, is a good sign either way. 'I stopped suggesting things' is the answer to worry about. Find out where the last one stalled and bring back a verdict, even if the verdict is no.
How are things between you and the rest of the team?
Why ask it
It is loose on purpose, so they can take it wherever the trouble is. Listen for 'mostly fine' and ask about the 'mostly'. If a conflict surfaces, ask what they would like you to do before you do anything, since stepping in uninvited can make their week worse.
When you disagree with a decision of mine, do you feel you can say so?
Why ask it
Only a yes that comes with a recent example is convincing. Without one, ask which decision of yours they would have made differently and hear it out without defending it. How you take that answer decides whether the next disagreement reaches you at all.
What do the leaders above me not understand about your work?
Why ask it
Answers come more freely here because the criticism is not aimed at you. Resist both joining in and defending; ask what they would want those leaders to see for themselves. Carry one point upward, leave their name off unless they agree, and report what came of it.
Growth
What are you learning here, and what do you want to learn?
Why ask it
An employee who cannot name anything learned in the past six months has probably stopped growing in the role, whatever they say next. For the second half, get past 'anything, really' to a single skill and agree how they will get a first try at it.
Where would you like your career to be in three years?
Why ask it
Say first that the answer does not have to include this employer or your team, or you will get a rehearsed one. 'I'm happy where I am' is a legitimate answer and should be taken at its word, not read as lack of ambition. If the goal lies somewhere this job cannot lead, you are better off knowing now and helping where you can.
Do you see a future for yourself here?
Why ask it
Blunt, so save it until the conversation has warmed up. A pause before 'yes' is worth a gentle 'what would make that an easier yes?' Sketch only the path you can deliver: say what is real, what is possible and what you do not know.
What job here would you want next, if any?
Why ask it
'If any' gives permission to say none, which keeps the answer honest. Some will name your job, and that is a compliment. Tell them what it takes to be considered for the role they name and who decides, because a clear list is kinder than vague encouragement.
If you could write your own job description for next year, what would be in it?
Why ask it
Ask for three lines: what stays, what goes and what is new. The new line is the one to act on, and if you can only deliver part of it, say which part. A description that amounts to a different job entirely is the answer to where they want to go next.
Is there a project, committee or assignment you have wanted to be part of?
Why ask it
Often the answer is something you can arrange within a week, which is rare in a conversation about growth. Someone who asked once and was passed over may say no out of habit, so mention two or three that are coming up. A group that is already full is not a no: tell them when the next opening is likely and put their name forward.
Do you feel stretched, comfortable or bored in your role right now?
Why ask it
Three choices are easier than an open question, and 'bored' is easier to pick from a list than to volunteer, because it sounds ungrateful. 'Comfortable' needs a follow-up on whether that is how they want it. The fix for bored is something harder, not simply more.
What training or support would help you most this year?
Why ask it
Aim for something specific enough to price: a course, a certification, a conference, time with a particular person. 'Whatever is available' can mean earlier requests were turned down. Check the budget beforehand so you can answer on the spot or give the date you will know.
Do you know who decides on raises and promotions here, and what they look for?
Why ask it
Plenty of people do not know and are embarrassed to admit it. Follow 'I think so' with 'tell me how you understand it', which shows where the gaps are. You may not be sure of the answer yourself, in which case say so, find out and bring it to the next meeting in writing.
What are you good at that you would like to teach others?
Why ask it
Being asked to teach is a form of recognition, and for some a first step toward a senior role. A modest shrug can be answered with something you have seen colleagues come to them for. Then arrange the session or the mentee, with time set aside so it does not land on top of a full week.
What did you hope to be doing by now that has not happened?
Why ask it
It surfaces a quiet disappointment that questions about the future miss: the specialty, the team lead role, the bigger account. Whatever stalled, find out whether they were ever told why, and tell them yourself if you know.
Why you might leave
When did you last think about leaving, and what prompted it?
Why ask it
The whole conversation leads to this, so do not rush to it or past it. If the first answer is 'never', try 'everyone has a bad week, what was yours about?' and then stay quiet. Ask what made them stay, thank them for telling you, and never bring it up later as a doubt about their loyalty.
What would tempt you to take a call from a recruiter?
Why ask it
It is framed around curiosity, not disloyalty, so it gets a freer answer than asking whether they are looking. Usually it comes down to one thing: money, a title, a shorter commute, a chance to lead. That is what a competitor will open with, and now you know whether you can match it.
If you did leave one day, what would be the most likely reason?
Why ask it
The hypothetical lets a contented person answer without alarm. 'I can't imagine it' is polite; ask them to imagine it anyway. Hold the reason up against what you control, and be honest with yourself if it is something you have been putting off.
What about working here frustrates you most often?
Why ask it
'Most often' asks for the irritation that repeats, not the worst day on record. If the first one is outside anyone's control, like the parking, take it seriously and then ask for the next one down.
What did an earlier job give you that this one does not?
Why ask it
It might be a mentor, a quieter office, a compressed week or a boss who left them alone, and it is exactly what another employer could offer them back. Where you cannot supply it, say so and ask what would come closest. Skip this with someone in a first job.
Do you feel your pay is fair for the work you do?
Why ask it
Ask only if you are ready to hear no and to do something with it, even if that means taking it to HR and reporting back. A quick 'it's fine' can mean they assume you have no say, so tell them what you can and cannot influence. Promise no figure in the room, and do not ask what colleagues earn.
Which benefits here do you actually use, and what is missing?
Why ask it
Pay gets the attention, but leave, insurance, retirement contributions or tuition help can settle a decision to move. Stay with the what and leave the why, since the reason a benefit matters is often private. Pass the gaps to whoever sets the package and tell the employee that you have.
Has anything changed here in the past year that made the job worse for you?
Why ask it
New leadership, a merger, a different schedule or a colleague's departure can turn a good job into a tolerable one without anyone deciding it should. Ask what they lost in the change and whether any of it can be given back.
When someone good leaves this team, what goes through your mind?
Why ask it
A departure makes everyone left behind do the math on their own job. 'Good for them' is polite; 'I wondered what they knew that I didn't' is the franker version, and you can say it first to make it sayable. Leave the colleague's reasons out of it and stay with what the news stirred up for the person in front of you.
Do you ever feel worn out by this job in a way that a weekend does not fix?
Why ask it
Keep it about the job and leave diagnosis out of it. 'Just tired, like everyone' is a common first reply; ask what a lighter month would have to look like. Should the answer reach beyond workload, mention whatever support your employer offers, such as an employee assistance program, and leave the choice with them.
How is the mix of remote and on-site work going for you?
Why ask it
Skip it where the work can only be done in person. Elsewhere, a change in attendance rules can start a job search, and people hesitate to object in case it marks them as uncommitted. Find out which days or tasks are the problem before you conclude nothing can be done.
Do you feel safe and respected at work?
Why ask it
For nurses, teachers and anyone who faces the public this can mean physical safety; for others it is about how they are spoken to. A hesitation calls for an unhurried follow-up, not quick reassurance. If what you hear involves harassment, discrimination or a safety risk, you may be required to report it, so say that before they go further and follow your organization's process.
What is the one thing about this job that must not change for you to stay?
Why ask it
It identifies the term of the deal that matters most: the schedule, the team, the kind of client, the freedom to work a certain way. Once you know it, give early warning if it is ever under threat, because hearing late is what turns a change into a resignation.
Is there anything going on here that worries you about the future of your job?
Why ask it
Rumors about budgets, closures or restructuring send good people looking before anything has happened. An employee who replies 'no, should there be?' has just asked you a question, so answer it. Share what you are allowed to, say when you cannot, and do not guess.
Follow up
Of everything we have talked about today, what matters most to you?
Why ask it
After a long list, this tells you where to start. A small pick may be a test of whether small things get done before a larger one is risked. Repeat it back in their words and say it is the first thing you will work on.
What could I do in the next thirty days that would make a difference to you?
Why ask it
A deadline turns talk into a commitment. Steer toward something within your own authority, so the first result does not hang on anyone else's approval, and put it in writing where both of you can see it, with the date.
What were you hoping I would ask today that I left out?
Why ask it
Sometimes the most useful answer of the hour arrives here, once the person has judged how the rest was received. Give it real time and do not start gathering your things. 'No, that covers it' is fine; say they can add to it by message later.
Can I read back what I heard, so you can tell me what I got wrong?
Why ask it
Read your notes back in three or four points before the meeting ends, with what you plan to do about each. Expect the emphasis to be corrected more than the facts: 'the schedule matters more than the pay'. Send the same summary in writing within a day or two so there is a record you both hold.
Which of the things you told me would you like kept between us?
Why ask it
Ask before either of you leaves, since some of what you heard has to travel to be acted on. Be honest about the limits: a safety or misconduct matter cannot stay private. Then keep to what you agreed, because one leak ends this kind of conversation for the whole team.
How did this conversation feel from your side?
Why ask it
A stay interview that felt like an interrogation, or like a hint that their job is at risk, does harm. A flat 'fine' suggests they are still wondering why you asked; explain again that you hold these with people you want to keep. Use what they say to change how you open the next one.
Since we last talked, what has changed for the better, and what has not moved?
Why ask it
This one belongs to the return meeting, a month or so later. Ask it before listing what you have done, so their view comes first. A change they did not notice was either too small or never explained, and both are worth knowing.
Of the things I could not change, which still bothers you?
Why ask it
Some requests will have been refused, and a refusal that is never mentioned again feels like being ignored. Give the reason once more, briefly, and ask whether a smaller version would help. 'It's fine, I understand' may be true; check again at the next conversation.
How often would you like to have a conversation like this?
Why ask it
Offer once or twice a year as a starting point, with an extra one in a first year or after a big change. Someone who says 'no need' found it either uncomfortable or pointless, so ask which. Put the next date in both calendars before you finish.
Running a stay interview: setup, guarded answers and what to do afterward
Practical guidance for the conversation itself
Setting up the conversation
Who to ask, and when
Begin with the people you would least like to lose, then work through the rest of the team over the following weeks, because a stay interview offered to a chosen few reads as favoritism. Keep it well away from performance reviews and pay decisions, when people are on their guard. A new hire is worth one after the first three to six months, while the job as advertised is still fresh in their mind.
Say why you are asking
An unexplained meeting with the boss makes people think of layoffs. Invite them a few days ahead in plain words: 'I would like to hear what keeps you here and what would make the job better. It is not a review, and nothing is wrong.' Send three or four of the questions with the invitation so they can think first.
Pick about ten questions, not the whole list
Thirty to forty-five minutes is enough. Take two from What keeps you here, one or two each from The work, Manager and team and Growth, two from Why you might leave, and one from Follow up to close. Ask everyone on the team the same handful so you can compare answers, and vary the rest.
The direct manager asks
Most of what comes up is within the manager's reach: assignments, schedules, feedback, recognition. That is why the person's own manager holds the conversation and HR supplies the format. The exception is when the manager may be the problem; then a manager one level up or someone from HR is the better person to ask.
Choose a private place and protect the time
Not the nurses' station, the break room or a hallway between classes. Close the door, silence the phone and do not let the meeting be moved twice, since a stay interview that keeps getting postponed tells the employee where they rank. For a remote employee, use video and say that nothing is being recorded.
Listen far more than you talk
Your part is the questions, the follow-ups and the summary at the end. Do not explain, defend or solve while they are talking. Take notes by hand, tell them you are doing it so nothing gets lost, and offer to show them what you wrote.
Getting past a guarded answer
Why the first answer is polite
The person across the table is talking to whoever writes their review and approves their leave. Until they see what happens to an honest answer, a careful one is the sensible choice. Treat a first stay interview as a test of you as much as a source of information.
What guarded sounds like
Short, general and positive: 'it's fine', 'can't complain', 'the people are great', 'it's busy everywhere'. Complaints aimed at things nobody controls, such as the parking or the building, belong here too. So does an answer that repeats the company's own language back to you.
Three follow-ups that open an answer
'What else?' asked two or three times, since the real reason is seldom first. 'Tell me about the last time that happened', which swaps a generality for an event. And 'if you had to pick one', which makes a long safe list give up its priority.
Go first with something of your own
An admission makes the next one cheaper. 'I know I cancel our one-to-ones too often' or 'I suspect the on-call schedule is harder than I have been told' shows that criticism will not be punished. Keep it true and brief, and then hand the conversation back.
Let the silence do some work
After a hard question, count slowly to five before you speak. Many managers rescue the employee with a second, easier question, and the first never gets answered. If the pause grows uncomfortable, 'take your time' is all you need to add.
Do not push past a no
If the answer is still 'everything is fine', accept it and move on. Trust comes from what you do after the meeting, not from pressing during it. Leave alone anything about health, family plans, religion, politics or life outside work unless they bring it up, and even then keep your follow-ups on the job. Rules on what an employer may ask differ by place, so check with HR if you are unsure.
What to do afterward
Sort what you heard into three lists
Things you can change yourself, things that need someone else's approval, and things that will not change. Do it the same day, while your notes still make sense. Then tell the employee which list each of their points landed on, so nothing they said disappears.
Do one visible thing within two weeks
Choose something from the first list, however small: a meeting dropped, a tool ordered, a shift swapped, an introduction made. Say plainly that it came out of the conversation. Speed matters here, because the employee is watching to see whether talking to you is worth the risk.
Say no clearly, with the reason
Some requests cannot be met. Give a plain no and the reason behind it, and where you can, a smaller version or a date when the answer might change. A request left hanging does more damage than one refused, since the person concludes they were not heard at all.
Promise only what is yours to give
Pay, titles and headcount usually belong to someone else. 'I will raise it and tell you what I hear by the end of the month' is a promise you can keep; a figure or a promotion date often is not. If the conversation turns to another offer they hold, do not bargain on the spot. Take it to whoever decides.
Look for the pattern across the team
One person's complaint about scheduling is a preference. The same complaint from four people is a problem with the schedule. After a round of interviews, write down the themes without names and take them to your own manager or to HR, along with what you have already changed.
Keep it out of the performance file
Nothing said in a stay interview should resurface in a review or a decision about who gets an opportunity, and that includes an admission that they have thought about leaving. The moment candor costs someone, the whole team learns to give the guarded answers again.
Book the return meeting before you part
Set a date a month or so out and use the last questions in Follow up when it comes. Open by asking what they have noticed, then go through the three lists. An annual stay interview with no check in between gives the employee a long time to decide that nothing came of it.
Stay interview questions for nurses, teachers and managers
Nurses and other shift staff
Lead with The work: the questions on schedule, on staffing and supplies and on workload usually carry the conversation, along with the one about feeling safe and respected. Put the questions in the unit's own words, such as 'your assignment' and 'your patient load'. Hold it off the unit, at the start of a shift when they are fresh and not at the end of a long one, and arrange coverage so they are not watching the clock. Twenty minutes that are protected beat forty that are interrupted.
Teachers and school staff
Timing matters in a school: ask well before contracts or intent-to-return forms go out, not in the last weeks of the year when decisions are made. The questions on how much say they have, on what gets in the way and on what the leaders above you do not understand tend to draw out the most: planning time, class assignments, and backing with behavior and parents. A principal or department head who can only change some of that should say which parts at the start.
When the employee is a manager
Managers absorb their team's complaints and are rarely asked about their own. Add two questions to the set: how much of their week goes to work only they can do, and what authority they lack that they need. The questions about feedback and about the leaders above you matter more here, because a manager who leaves can take others along.
New hires
At three to six months, lean on 'What made you take this job, and how much of that is still true?' and the questions on equipment, feedback and the team. Skip the three-year career question; it is too early. The aim is to catch a mismatch while it is still cheap to fix.
Remote and hybrid employees
You see less of how their week goes, so ask more often, perhaps twice a year. Include the question on remote and on-site work, the one about how well you understand their day, and the one about the rest of the team. Being overlooked is the complaint to listen for.
Stay interview, exit interview or survey?
An exit interview asks the same things after the decision is made, when the answers can only help the next person. An engagement survey is usually anonymous, so you cannot ask a follow-up or act for one individual. A stay interview is a named conversation with someone you can still do something for, which is its whole advantage and the reason the follow-through matters.