AMA Questions to Ask
For anyone who has been invited to ask: a friend's question box on Instagram or Snapchat, a round of ask me anything in the group chat, a creator's livestream or a Reddit AMA. The 55 questions are grouped in the order an AMA tends to go: Openers, Personal, Funny, What if, Deep, and a last group, Public AMAs, for a creator, a public figure or a stranger with an interesting job. Every note says what a good answer sounds like, what to send next, or what to keep out of a box that will be reposted for everyone to read.
Want questions from the whole vault instead? Try the random question generator.
The questions
Each question, and why to ask it
Openers
What is one thing most people would not guess about you?
Why ask it
The standard AMA question, and it lasts because the host chooses the size of the secret. Expect an old job or a sport they used to play. If you get 'I'm an open book', narrow it next time to a fear, a hobby or a food.
What are you watching, reading or playing right now, and is it actually good?
Why ask it
Asking for a verdict is what gets more than a bare title back. If they name something you know, reply to the answer itself: with a friend, the question box is often just an excuse to start talking.
What song have you played the most this month?
Why ask it
Where the app lets them attach the track, this takes one tap to answer, which counts when thirty other questions are waiting. A song you have never heard of is the better result, so go listen before you reply.
What is the last photo you took, and what is the story behind it?
Why ask it
Suits Instagram and Snapchat, where the answer can be the photo itself. If they describe it without showing it, take the hint and do not ask to see it.
What question were you hoping someone would send?
Why ask it
Hands the host the opening they posted the box for, whether that is news to share or a story they like telling. Send it when an AMA is going slowly and the answers have been short.
What have you been telling everyone to try lately?
Why ask it
A recommendation is easier to give in public than a fact about yourself, so this gets answered by hosts who skip the personal ones. A flat 'nothing really' usually means the box is full, not that you asked badly, so do not send it twice.
What is a small thing you are weirdly picky about?
Why ask it
Pillows, pens, how the dishwasher is loaded. It is specific enough to answer in one line and odd enough that other people watching will reply with theirs.
What is the first thing you do when you wake up, honestly?
Why ask it
The honest answer is usually scrolling in bed, and a host who says so will be candid about the rest. A polished answer about stretching and lemon water tells you this one is playing to the audience, so keep your questions light.
What made you post an ask me anything today?
Why ask it
It is about the last five minutes, so nobody has to think. 'I was bored' tells you to keep things light, and 'I never do this' tells you they are hoping for real questions, so send one next.
Personal
What are you proud of from this year that you never posted about?
Why ask it
Being asked is the excuse to brag that most people will not give themselves. The best answers are small and unglamorous, like finally passing the driving test, and they deserve a reply that says well done.
What were you like five years ago, in three words?
Why ask it
Three words fit on a story and take ten seconds, which is why this gets answered when 'how have you changed?' does not. The follow-up to send is which of the three is still true.
What phase were you completely obsessed with and then dropped overnight?
Why ask it
Skateboarding, sourdough, a band, a mobile game. Old friends in the audience tend to pile on with evidence, so only send it to someone who enjoys being teased.
What is your comfort show, movie or game, the one you go back to when you are worn out?
Why ask it
Asking about comfort gets a truer answer than asking for a favorite, because nobody picks a comfort show to impress anyone. Remember it: it makes an easy invitation later.
What is the best advice anyone has given you, and did you take it?
Why ask it
Asked on its own, 'best advice' gets a quote off a poster. Whether they took it is the story, and the host who admits to ignoring it for years is telling you more than the advice does.
What do you do completely differently from the rest of your family?
Why ask it
Usually it is something harmless, like being the only one who is on time or who likes spicy food. If the answer turns toward a real rift at home, do not chase it in the box: that is for a private message, if anywhere.
What goal are you working on that you would not mind being asked about again in a month?
Why ask it
They get to name a goal they are happy to be held to and keep the fragile ones to themselves. Then do ask again in a month: the follow-through is what makes this kind and not just nosy.
What do you do to cheer yourself up after a bad day?
Why ask it
Note the snack, the walk or the playlist, because you have just been told how to look after them the next time a week goes wrong. An answer that sounds like the bad day is today calls for a check-in by message, not a reply everyone can read.
Who was your first celebrity crush?
Why ask it
A crush on someone famous can be admitted in public, because the person named will never see it. 'First' tends to mean a cartoon character or someone from a boy band, so ask how old they were.
What does your perfect first date look like?
Why ask it
It asks for taste and no names, so it can be answered in front of anyone. Asking who they like, in a box they may repost, puts them and somebody else on the spot, so leave that version out.
What is a green flag you look for in a new friend?
Why ask it
Friendlier than asking for red flags, which tends to turn into a description of someone specific who may be reading. A thoughtful answer, such as 'they remember what you told them', is also a quiet instruction to everyone watching.
Funny
What is the most embarrassing thing you are willing to admit here?
Why ask it
'Willing to' and 'here' let them set the limit, and that is why this version gets answered when 'most embarrassing moment' gets skipped. Whatever they give you, do not screenshot it.
What food opinion will you defend against everyone?
Why ask it
Reliable in any AMA because nobody gets hurt and everybody has one. When the answer is reposted, expect the replies to turn into a vote, and cast yours.
What is the worst thing you ever spent money on?
Why ask it
Ask what it cost if they leave that out, because a regret with a price tag is twice as funny. Should the story turn out to involve real debt or a scam, reply with sympathy and skip the joke.
What is your most-used emoji, and what does it actually mean when you send it?
Why ask it
Everyone has one that means something other than what it shows. The translation is the useful part, especially from someone whose thumbs-up has been worrying you.
What would the warning label on you say?
Why ask it
Good answers are self-aware and specific: 'do not speak to before ten', 'will narrate the movie'. A bleak one about being hard to be around is not a joke to laugh along with, so answer that with something warm.
What do you think you are good at that your friends would argue with?
Why ask it
Singing, parking, giving directions. In a group chat AMA this is the one that brings out witnesses, so be ready for the host's friends to answer before the host does.
If this month of your life were a TV episode, what would the title be?
Why ask it
A short creative task that looks good on a story. The title often says more about how they are doing than a direct 'how are you' would, so read it twice.
What is the last thing you searched for that you are happy to show everyone?
Why ask it
Because they choose what to show, you get something harmless and strange, usually a spelling or how long to boil an egg. Never ask for a screenshot of the search history itself.
What if
If you could wake up tomorrow living anywhere, where would it be?
Why ask it
One place name is enough of an answer, so send it to a host who is getting through questions quickly. 'What is stopping you?' is the follow-up, and 'my whole life is here' is a perfectly good reply to it.
If you could be instantly great at one thing, what would you choose?
Why ask it
Answers split between the practical, like a language or parallel parking, and the show-off, like piano. Whichever they pick, ask whether they have ever tried to learn it the slow way.
If you could relive one day from the last year exactly as it went, which day would it be?
Why ask it
A better way to ask for a favorite memory, because a single day comes with a date, a place and the people who were there. On a story it often comes back as a photo. If you were part of that day, say so.
If you had to give a talk tomorrow with no time to prepare, what would it be about?
Why ask it
This finds the subject they know cold, which is rarely their job: the lore of a video game, a team's worst season, how to pack a car. Then ask for the first line of the talk.
If you could bring back one thing that no longer exists, like a show, a snack or a store, what would it be?
Why ask it
Discontinued snacks tend to beat anything serious. It works best with an audience, since half the people reading will remember the same thing and say so in the replies.
Would you rather fight one horse-sized duck or a hundred duck-sized horses?
Why ask it
A long-running joke question from Reddit AMAs, and a host who knows it will be glad to see it. It only works when they defend the choice, so ask for their strategy. Skip it in a serious AMA, where it reads as not having listened.
Deep
What were you worried about a year ago that turned out fine?
Why ask it
One of the few deep questions that is comfortable to answer in public, because the ending is already happy. It also helps anyone reading who is still in the worried part.
What is your biggest fear that is not spiders, heights or the dark?
Why ask it
The plain 'biggest fear' question gets 'spiders' and nothing else, which is why the usual three are ruled out. What comes back is closer to the truth: being forgotten, letting people down. A short 'me too' is a better reply than advice.
What mattered a lot to you a few years ago that does not matter now?
Why ask it
Answers run from grades and follower counts to what an ex thinks. Ask what took its place, because that half tells you what they care about today.
What did you have to learn the hard way?
Why ask it
They decide how hard the hard way was, from a ruined sweater to a lost friendship. If they pick a heavy one, thank them and do not ask for the details in the box.
What do you wish you had started sooner?
Why ask it
A regret question with the sting taken out, since the answer is something they did start in the end. Saving money, going to the gym and saying no all come up. What finally got them going is the part you can use, so ask for it.
Who changed the direction of your life, and do they know?
Why ask it
A teacher, a coach or an older cousin, more often than a parent, and quite often they have never been told. When that is the answer, the only follow-up worth sending is 'will you tell them?'
What is the hardest thing you have done that you would do again?
Why ask it
It rules out plain bad luck and leaves the difficult things they chose: a move, a degree, an honest conversation. Ask what they would do differently the second time.
What would you tell yourself at the start of this year?
Why ask it
Shorter range than the usual letter to a younger self, so the answer is about something still fresh. It can touch a loss or a breakup. When it does, reply to the feeling and do not ask what happened.
What do you want the people closest to you to say about you?
Why ask it
This is about reputation among five people, not fame, so the answers are modest: reliable, funny, shows up. If it is already true of them, say so.
Public AMAs
What does an ordinary day look like for you, from start to finish?
Why ask it
The question most readers of a job or creator AMA came for. Asking for an ordinary day gets the Tuesday with the emails in it and not the highlight reel, and the answers that go hour by hour are the ones worth reading.
What part of your work would surprise people who only see the finished result?
Why ask it
Written for a creator, an author or anyone with an unusual job. Specific questions about process get long answers in a public AMA, where 'how did you get started?' has usually been asked before you arrive.
What do people always ask you that misses the interesting part?
Why ask it
It lets the host correct the question they are tired of and then answer the better one. Read the thread first, though: if somebody has asked it already, add your follow-up under theirs.
What did you believe when you started that you no longer believe?
Why ask it
Gets a considered answer from an expert and a funny one from everybody else. A host who says they were right about everything from the beginning is giving you the press-release version.
What nearly made you quit, and what kept you going?
Why ask it
Ask it of someone who has been at it for years, not someone three months in. Leave off 'what kept you going' and the answer stops at the low point with an audience watching, which is unkind to the host.
Whose work do you admire that more people should know about?
Why ask it
Hosts enjoy this one because it lets them be generous with their platform. You come away with a name to look up, which is more than most AMA answers give you.
What mistake do you see beginners make that is easy to fix?
Why ask it
The easy fix is something you can use tonight, and naming it spares everyone a lecture. In a livestream, add your own situation in one line and the answer may be aimed at you.
What did you say no to that you are still glad about?
Why ask it
A respectful way to ask about money and offers without asking for a figure. Asking a stranger what they earn, in front of an audience, mostly gets ignored, and on a moderated AMA it may be removed.
What is the strangest thing that counts as completely normal in your job?
Why ask it
Made for the Reddit kind of AMA, where the host is a lighthouse keeper or an air traffic controller and not a celebrity. Keep it about the job: asking exactly where they work can identify them, and a careful host will skip it.
What are you working on next that you are allowed to talk about?
Why ask it
A host under contract or holding a release date cannot answer 'any spoilers?', but most can answer this. Even a vague reply tells you something exists, and you can ask when to check back.
How do you like people to say hello when they recognize you in public?
Why ask it
Very few fans think to ask this, and the host will have an opinion. Take the answer at face value: if they say a wave is plenty, a wave is plenty.
What is the best question anyone has asked you in one of these?
Why ask it
Good near the end of a long AMA, when the host is tired of answering and happy to reminisce. Note what they pick, because it shows you what to ask next time.
How to ask in an AMA and get a real answer
Practical guidance for the conversation itself
Before you send anything
Find out who can see your name
Question boxes differ. On some apps the person who posted sees who sent each question even when the shared answer hides the sender, and on others a question can be fully anonymous. Check how it works on the app you are using, and send nothing you would not say with your name on it.
Read what has already been answered
In a Reddit thread or a long run of stories, the obvious questions go first. Scroll before you type. If yours has been asked, reply under it with a follow-up, which is more likely to be picked up than a repeat.
Send one question at a time
A message with four questions gets the easiest one answered and the rest dropped. Pick the one you care about. You can send another once you have seen how they answered.
Match the question to how well you know them
A close friend can take a question from Deep in the first five minutes. Someone you have met twice, or a creator who does not know you exist, should get an opener, a What if or something from Public AMAs. The same words read very differently coming from a stranger.
How to get more than one word back
Ask for one specific instance
'Favorite food?' gets one word. 'What food opinion will you defend against everyone?' gets a paragraph. Ask for a particular thing, moment or person, and give the host something to push against: a verdict, a limit, a choice between two.
Make it easy to answer on a phone
The host is typing with their thumbs, often over a photo. A question that can be answered in a line or with a picture gets chosen over one that needs an essay. Limits help: three words, one song, the last photo.
Build the way out into the question
Phrases like 'that you are willing to admit' or 'that you are allowed to talk about' let the host answer at the level they choose. People are more candid when they have not been cornered.
Reply to the answer, not with the next question
With a friend, the conversation afterward is the real point of the box. When your question is answered, respond to what they said. That is also how you find out whether a deeper question would be welcome.
What not to ask in front of an audience
Anything that points at a third person
Crushes, exes, who they dislike, which friend they would drop. The host can decline, but the person being hinted at cannot, and they may be watching. If you would not ask it with that person in the room, do not put it in a box.
Money, bodies, health and addresses
Income, weight, a diagnosis, where exactly someone lives or works. These are theirs to raise. In a public AMA they are also the questions most likely to be skipped or taken down by whoever moderates it, so they waste your turn.
An insult with a question mark on it
'Why did you stop being fun?' is not a question, and an anonymous box makes that kind of thing tempting. The test is whether the person could possibly enjoy giving the answer. If not, do not send it.
Something heavy that belongs in private
If what you are really asking is whether a friend is okay, a public box is the wrong place, because answering means telling everyone. Send a direct message, say why you are asking, and make it clear that no reply is needed.
Where you are asking
A friend's box on Instagram or Snapchat
Assume your question may be reposted with their answer on top of it. Openers, Personal, Funny and What if all read well that way. Keep Deep for friends you would also ask in person, and expect the fuller answer to arrive by message.
Ask me anything in a group chat
Agree on two things before the first question: the person in the seat can pass on anything without giving a reason, and the answers stay in the chat. Take one question from each person, then move the seat on, so nobody sits in it for an hour.
A Reddit AMA
Arrive early, keep the question to a sentence or two, and put any background after the question, not before it. Hosts often work from the questions other readers have voted up, and a clear, specific one is easier to vote for than a long one. Each community sets its own rules on what may be asked, so read them before you post.
A livestream or live Q and A
Chat moves fast and the host reads what catches their eye. Short, specific and friendly wins. Send it once, perhaps again after a few minutes, and never in all caps: flooding the chat is a quick way to be timed out by a moderator.