Crush Questions to Ask Your Friends
For friends, mostly teens, who want to talk about crushes at a sleepover, at lunch or in the group chat without anyone being cornered. The 52 questions are sorted into six groups that follow how the talk usually goes: Old crushes, Funny, Right now, What next, What if and Between us. Nobody has to say a name, every question can be skipped, and each one comes with a short note on what to do with the answer.
Want questions from the whole vault instead? Try the random question generator.
The questions
Each question, and why to ask it
Old crushes
Who was your very first crush, and how old were you?
Why ask it
A crush from second grade can be said out loud because nothing rides on it anymore, which is why this one goes first. Ask what they did about it back then. The usual answers are nothing at all, or chasing the person around at recess.
Which cartoon or movie character did you like before you knew what a crush was?
Why ask it
Animated foxes, a prince, the lead in a show about teenage spies. Nobody has to defend the choice, though the group will make them try. It also gives an easy turn to anyone who says they have never liked a real person.
What's the most embarrassing thing you've ever done while a crush was watching?
Why ask it
Ask whether the crush even noticed. Most tellers have to admit they never found out, and that the voice crack or the wave meant for somebody else has lived on only in their own head. That is a useful thing to hear before the questions about right now.
Have you ever had a crush on someone who was your friend first?
Why ask it
A yes usually comes with a decision: say something and risk the friendship, or wait for it to pass. Ask which they chose and whether they would choose the same way again. Keep it in the past tense, and if the friend in question is sitting in the circle, let the person skip.
Have you ever told someone you liked them, and how did you do it?
Why ask it
Get the method before the reply: a note in a locker, a text sent at midnight, a friend sent across the playground as messenger. Anyone who has actually done it has earned some respect from the room, whatever the answer was. Never having told anyone is a fine answer too and needs no explaining.
Which old crush makes you wonder what you were thinking?
Why ask it
If the person still goes to your school, a description does the job: 'the one with the skateboard' is enough. Laugh at your own taste and not at the person, who did nothing wrong except be liked.
Have you ever liked someone mostly because your friends did?
Why ask it
Whole friend groups have shared one crush for a semester, and admitting it is funny afterward. Ask how they worked out it was not really their own. If two people here name the same semester, let them compare notes.
What's the longest you've ever liked one person?
Why ask it
Two weeks gets a laugh and two years deserves a straight face. If someone gives a long answer quietly, do not turn it into the joke of the night. Ask what kept it going and let them stop when they want to.
Funny
Who's your celebrity crush right now, and what would you really say if you met them?
Why ask it
The name comes fast. The second half is the real question, since most people admit they would freeze, say 'hi' too loudly or pretend not to recognize them. Owning up to the freezing makes the later questions easier to answer.
What's the most ridiculous reason you've ever started liking someone?
Why ask it
They lent a pencil, they had neat handwriting, they said 'bless you' once. Crushes start on almost nothing, and hearing that out loud takes the seriousness out of the whole subject. Collect everyone's reason before anyone explains theirs.
What tiny thing ended a crush for you on the spot?
Why ask it
Keep it to the habit and leave the person unnamed: the way someone ran for the bus, a ringtone, how they ate a sandwich. With a name attached it turns into making fun of somebody who is not there to answer back.
What do you turn into when someone you like is nearby: louder, silent or suddenly very busy?
Why ask it
Friends will answer for each other here, and they are usually right. Let the person give their own version first, then let the group correct it. The 'suddenly very busy' ones tend to be found checking an empty locker.
Have you ever sent a message about a crush to the wrong person, or come close?
Why ask it
The near misses are as good as the disasters: the thumb hovering over send, the screenshot that almost went to the class chat. Nobody will need telling afterward why names stay out of anything typed.
Have you ever practiced a conversation with a crush in your head? How did the real one go?
Why ask it
In the rehearsal everyone is witty. In the hallway it comes out as 'hey' and a remark about the weather. Ask for both versions side by side, performed if the person is willing.
Have you ever scrolled so far back on a crush's profile that you were scared of liking an old photo by accident?
Why ask it
Everyone with a phone knows this fear: one slip of the thumb on a picture from two years ago. Ask how far back they got and what they found out. If someone admits the slip really happened, they owe the room the story of the next ten seconds.
What song do you put on when you're thinking about someone you like?
Why ask it
A song gives away the mood without giving away the person: hopeful, dramatic or fully heartbroken over somebody they have spoken to twice. At a sleepover, play ten seconds of each and let the room guess whose it is.
What code name have you used for a crush so nobody would know who you meant?
Why ask it
Code names are a tradition for a reason: they let friends talk freely in a hallway. The best are odd, like 'Toast' or 'Blue Backpack'. Anyone with a current crush can choose one now and use it for the rest of the game.
Right now
Do you have a crush right now? Yes or no is a full answer.
Why ask it
The question ends at yes or no. A yes with no name attached is complete, and whoever follows it with 'who?' is breaking the rule the group agreed on. 'No' and 'not sure' are just as good, and nobody should be argued out of them.
What do the people you've had crushes on tend to have in common?
Why ask it
Friends often spot the pattern before the person does: always the class clown, always somebody a year older, always whoever is good at drawing. It also gives anyone without a crush right now a full turn. Stick to personality and habits, and steer away from rating how people look.
Without saying a name, what three words describe the person you like?
Why ask it
Three words are short enough to feel safe. 'Kind, funny, loud' is a different person from 'quiet, tall, mysterious', so the group learns the type without learning the identity. Do not try to match the words to a face.
When did you first notice you liked them?
Why ask it
Usually there is a small scene: a joke in class, a held door, a moment in a group project. The scene tells you whether the crush is about something the person did or only about how they look from across a room.
What do you like about them that has nothing to do with looks?
Why ask it
A good answer is specific, like 'they include whoever is standing on the edge'. A blank is not a failure, since many crushes start from a distance. It just means the next step is a conversation and not a confession.
How do they treat people they aren't trying to impress?
Why ask it
Possibly the most useful thing to find out about anyone you like. 'I do not know' means watch for a while before deciding anything. An answer about them being unkind to a younger kid or a quiet classmate is worth saying out loud among friends.
Does this person know you exist, know you like them, or neither?
Why ask it
Each answer asks something different of friends. 'Does not know I exist' needs encouragement to say hello. 'Knows I like them' comes with a story, and it is the teller's call how much of it to share.
After you've been around them, do you feel good or a bit worse about yourself?
Why ask it
Nervous is normal and so is replaying every word afterward. Feeling smaller, or feeling you have to act like somebody else to be noticed, is the answer a friend should gently pick up on.
Do you want something to happen, or do you just like having the crush?
Why ask it
Plenty of crushes are simply a nice thing to think about during math. If that is the answer, the group's job is to leave it alone and not start planning on the person's behalf.
What next
Would you rather tell them yourself or have them find out some other way?
Why ask it
'Some other way' is the easy first answer, and it is worth asking what that way would be. News that travels through three people tends to arrive changed. If the plan involves a friend passing it on, that friend gets to say whether they are willing.
What's stopping you from talking to them more?
Why ask it
Listen for whether it is nerves, never being in the same place or worry about what other people will say. Each has a different fix, and only the person answering knows which is real. Offer ideas only if they ask for them.
What's the smallest thing you could do about it this week?
Why ask it
Small enough to be boring is the standard: say hi, ask what they thought of the test, sit one seat closer. Rule out grand gestures. A step the person picks is one they might take, and one the group picks will not happen.
Do you want our help, or do you want us to stay completely out of it?
Why ask it
Whatever they say is binding. 'Stay out of it' means no hints, no nudging in the hallway and no messages sent for them. A friend who helps after hearing no will not be told about the next crush.
Would you rather hang out with them one on one or in a group first?
Why ask it
Group first is a popular answer because it takes the pressure off. Families and schools have different rules about this, so nobody's answer is wrong, and anyone unsure can ask at home how it works for them.
Would you tell anyone at home about this crush?
Why ask it
Some families joke about it at dinner and others have firm rules about dating, so expect a split. Do not comment on anyone's house rules. The answers show who has an adult to talk to if a crush ever gets complicated.
If someone you didn't like back told you they liked you, what would you say?
Why ask it
Worth rehearsing, because it happens with no warning. The version to aim for is short, kind and clear, something like 'thank you for telling me, I do not feel the same'. The other half is not telling the whole school afterward.
What would you want from us if they turned out not to feel the same way?
Why ask it
One friend wants snacks and no questions, another wants to talk it through for an hour. Remember what each person says, because on the day it matters they will not be in the mood to explain it.
What would make you decide to let this crush go?
Why ask it
Finding out they like someone else, seeing them be unkind, or the feeling fading over a summer. Naming an exit ahead of time makes it easier to take. For a friend who says 'nothing could', a check-in a month from now is kinder than an argument tonight.
What if
What would you do if your crush sat down next to you at lunch tomorrow?
Why ask it
Have the person act out the first ten seconds. Most versions involve forgetting how to eat. Then ask for the calm version, the one they would like to manage, which is quietly useful practice.
If you got to plan one afternoon with your crush, what would the two of you do?
Why ask it
Nobody has to be named for this one, and people without a crush can invent the company. Compare the plans: an arcade and a lot of noise says something different from a long walk to get ice cream. Then ask what the two of them would talk about, since that is where most daydreams run out.
Would you rather have your crush read every text you've sent about them or watch you dance alone in your room?
Why ask it
Purely for laughs, and it resets the mood after a heavier question. Make people defend their choice. Anyone who picks the dancing without a pause has just told you what is in those texts.
Would you rather know for certain they don't like you back, or never find out?
Why ask it
Splits a room cleanly. The 'know for certain' side is often closer to doing something about it than they let on, and the 'never find out' side is enjoying the daydream. Neither needs talking out of it.
If you could ask your crush one question and get a completely honest answer, what would it be?
Why ask it
'Do you like me' is the obvious one, so allow it and then ask for a second. The second is more telling: what they think of you, who they are when nobody is watching, whether they noticed that one thing you did.
If you could send your crush one anonymous compliment, what would it say?
Why ask it
A sweet one with no risk attached. The compliment shows what the person has noticed, like a laugh or the way they stick up for people. Keep it imaginary: a real anonymous message can unsettle whoever receives it.
If they liked you back starting tomorrow, what would change?
Why ask it
Sometimes the honest answer is 'I would panic'. That suggests the crush is more fun right now than the reality would be, and there is nothing wrong with that. If the answer is a clear picture, ask which part they look forward to most.
If your crush wanted you to change something about yourself, would you?
Why ask it
It depends on the something, and that is the discussion. Trying a band they like costs nothing. Dropping a friend, a hobby or the way you dress in order to be liked is the answer the group should push back on, kindly.
What would we do if two of us liked the same person?
Why ask it
Better settled as a hypothetical than discovered in the middle of the year. Many groups land on saying it out loud early and remembering that the third person gets a say too. Whatever you agree, agree it before it is real.
Between us
Who's allowed to know what we just told each other?
Why ask it
Ask it before the phones come back out. The simplest rule is that each person's answers belong to that person, and only they can repeat them. Get a yes from everyone out loud, including the friend who is half asleep.
Has a crush secret of yours ever gotten out, and what was that like?
Why ask it
Someone who has been through it explains the rule better than any promise can. Listen without defending whoever spread it. If the leak came from inside this group, an apology now is worth more than an explanation.
How do you want us to act when your crush is around?
Why ask it
'Normal' is the usual request and the hardest thing for a group to manage. Get specifics: no elbowing, no sudden silence, no saying their name loudly. Then actually do it on Monday.
What teasing about this is fine with you, and what isn't?
Why ask it
The line sits in a different place for each friend. One likes the jokes in private and hates them in the hallway, another does not want it mentioned at all. Take the answer as given, with no 'but it is just a joke'.
Would you want to be told if one of us heard your crush liked somebody else?
Why ask it
Some want to know straight away and some would rather find out on their own. Asking ahead means that when a friend does hear something, they already know what you want and do not have to guess.
Is a friend's brother, sister or ex off limits in this group?
Why ask it
Groups disagree and so do the people inside them, so hear from the friend with the sibling first. 'Ask me before anything happens' is a fair middle. What matters is that the rule exists before anyone needs it.
Do you ever feel left out when everyone is talking about crushes and you don't have one?
Why ask it
Not having a crush is a complete answer, tonight and in general. Some people get them rarely or not at all, and nothing about that needs fixing. If someone says yes, switch to a different kind of question for a while.
If one of us disappeared into a crush and stopped showing up, how should the rest of us bring it up?
Why ask it
Agreeing on the wording ahead of time makes it possible to say later. 'We miss you' lands better than 'you have changed'. Whoever asks the question should say how they would want to hear it too.
How to run crush questions with friends
Practical guidance for the conversation itself
Before the first question
Agree what stays in the room
Say the rule out loud before anyone answers: what a person says about their own crush is theirs to repeat and nobody else's. That covers screenshots, the group chat and the friend who was not there. A game with no rule produces safe, fake answers, because everyone is protecting themselves.
No names unless someone offers one
Every question on this page can be answered without naming a real person. Make that the default and let anyone who wants to share a name do it unprompted. Code names, initials that are not the real ones and 'someone in my science class' all count as answers.
Start with crushes that are over
Old crushes is all in the past, and Funny is mostly famous people and stories that ended long ago, so nothing is at stake. Run a few rounds there before touching Right now. People decide how honest to be from the way the first few answers were treated.
A pass is free
Anyone can skip any question with no reason given and no forfeit. A skip also proves nothing: plenty of people pass on a crush question because they have no crush, or because they do not feel like talking about it. Treating a pass as a clue is the fastest way to end the game.
Where you are playing
At a sleepover
Go around the circle with one question per round so everyone answers the same thing, the asker last. Keep Right now and What next for after the lights go down, when nobody has to be looked at. Close with two or three from Between us so the night ends on what the group has agreed, not on a cliffhanger.
At lunch
Other tables can hear, and the person being discussed might be twenty feet away. Stay in Old crushes, Funny and What if, use code names, and leave anything current for somewhere private. One question is enough for a lunch period.
In the group chat
Anything typed can be screenshotted and forwarded, even by accident, so treat the chat as public. The hypotheticals and the would-you-rather questions work well in text. Questions about a current crush do not belong there, and it is fine to answer one with 'ask me in person'.
With one friend
Two people can go further than a group, since there is no audience to perform for. Take turns asking, and answer every question you ask. What next is at its best here: one friend thinking out loud and the other mostly listening.
When it stops being fun
The group starts guessing
Guessing feels like a game to the guessers and like being cornered to the person in the middle. Whoever is asking the questions should end it right away: 'no guessing, next question'. If it keeps happening, go back to the hypotheticals for a few rounds.
A name slips out
It happens, usually by accident and sometimes because a friend answered on someone's behalf. Do not react loudly. Ask the person whose crush it is what they want, which is nearly always for everyone to act as if they did not hear it, and then hold to that at school.
Two friends like the same person
Stop the game for a minute and let both of them say so without anyone taking sides. Nobody gets to claim a person because they liked them first, and the person in question has a say of their own. What can be protected is the friendship, and saying that out loud helps.
An answer worries you
Most crush answers are harmless. If a friend describes someone who is much older, an adult, or someone who makes them feel bad or asks them to keep secrets, take it seriously without making a scene. Talk to them privately afterward and encourage them to tell an adult they trust. That is one thing the room rule does not cover.