Fun Questions to Ask Your Partner
These are fun questions to ask your partner when 'how was your day' has run out: on date night, at the stove, in a slow line or four hours into a drive. The 100 questions open with Quick ones that take a minute, move through Would you rather, What if and a Know me quiz, and end with a Road trip group the driver can play and Memories and plans, for a spouse or significant other you already share some history with. The notes give the follow-up or the game for two, and point out the answers worth writing down.
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The questions
Each question, and why to ask it
Quick
What's the best thing that happened today that you haven't told me yet?
Why ask it
The upgrade on 'how was your day', which mostly gets 'fine'. Asking for the one untold thing gets a story, and trading one each over dinner makes a good standing habit.
This or that, as fast as you can: mountains or ocean, pancakes or waffles, plan it or wing it?
Why ask it
Say your guess out loud before your partner answers. Three pairs make a round, and whoever misses more has to invent the next three pairs.
If you could eat one meal again tonight exactly as it was, which meal from your whole life would it be?
Why ask it
People answer with a place and a person as much as a plate. File the dish away: a homemade attempt at it, even a clumsy one, makes a birthday or anniversary dinner that means something.
What's your guilty pleasure that you don't feel even slightly guilty about?
Why ask it
The second half rules out the polite answer. Whether it's a reality show or cereal for dinner, the next step is to join in once, with no commentary, and see whether it's catching.
What were you completely obsessed with at age ten?
Why ask it
Ask how much of it they can still recite. With a dinosaur phase or a boy band the answer is usually 'all of it', and the recital is the entertainment.
What song is stuck in your head right now?
Why ask it
The risk is that asking passes the song to you. Put it on and let it play through, and notice how often the culprit is a jingle neither of you even likes.
What's the best smell in the world?
Why ask it
Quick to answer and oddly personal: cut grass, a bakery, a grandparent's garage. Give yours too, then work out whether either one can be found within a mile of where you're sitting.
What's the last thing that made you laugh out loud when nobody else was around?
Why ask it
Make them show you the video or retell the joke. Whether you laugh as well tells you if the two of you share a sense of humor or just put up with each other's, and both arrangements work.
Which chore do you secretly not mind doing?
Why ask it
Nobody volunteers this, since it sounds like signing up for the job. Trade answers anyway and you may find a swap that improves both your weeks, such as their folding for your dishes.
What would you name a boat if we owned one?
Why ask it
Puns are expected, and the worse the better. Keep the winner, because it will do for a trivia team, a wifi network or a houseplant long before there is ever a boat.
What's your most unpopular food opinion?
Why ask it
Allow thirty seconds of uninterrupted defense, whether the charge is well-done steak or raisins in cookies. Then rule on whether that opinion is welcome in your kitchen.
What tiny thing would make tomorrow ten percent better?
Why ask it
The answers are usually cheap: coffee already made, ten quiet minutes, a ride to work. Remember this one, because it's a favor you can do before tomorrow is over without being asked.
What's a word you love the sound of, and a word you can't stand?
Why ask it
Everyone has both and hardly anyone has been asked. Be warned that once you know the word your partner can't stand, you'll be tempted to drop it into conversation for years.
If today were an episode of a TV show, what would the episode be called?
Why ask it
A lighter way to ask about the day, and it works even after a bad one. 'The One Where the Printer Won' says more than 'fine' does and comes with a story attached.
What are you looking forward to this week, even if it's small?
Why ask it
Good on a Sunday night. If the answer is 'nothing', plan one small thing together on the spot, even if it's only a particular sandwich on Thursday.
What's the best thing you've ever bought for under twenty dollars?
Why ask it
A phone stand, a good vegetable peeler, one specific pen. People light up about these, and you come away with a short list of small gifts your partner would really use.
Which three people, from any time in history, are coming to your dinner party?
Why ask it
An old standby that earns its place through the follow-ups: what's being served, and which guests will argue? Compare lists and decide whether your two parties could share a table.
Would you rather
Would you rather have a rewind button or a pause button for your life?
Why ask it
Rewinders want to redo a moment and pausers want to stay inside one. Ask which moment gets the button first, and whether you were there for it.
Would you rather be able to teleport anywhere for one hour a day or fly first class anywhere once a year?
Why ask it
This separates the person who wants lunch in Lisbon from the one who wants two unhurried weeks away. Name a first destination each; a match is a trip to start saving for.
Would you rather always know what I'm thinking or have me always know what you're thinking?
Why ask it
Most people would sooner read a mind than have theirs read, and the reasons are the funny part. Keep it playful by offering one harmless thought from today that you'd hate to have had broadcast.
Would you rather cook dinner every night or clean up after it every night?
Why ask it
A hypothetical that can turn into household policy. Opposite answers mean you try the arrangement for a week; matching answers mean a coin toss for Monday.
Would you rather give up cheese or give up chocolate for good?
Why ask it
Answers come fast and with conviction. Use it to set stakes for the evening: whoever loses the next game goes a day without the one they refused to give up.
Would you rather spend a year in a tiny apartment in a big city or in a big house an hour from anywhere?
Why ask it
Under the game sits a real preference about noise, space and neighbors. Notice whether your answers agree, because the question tends to return when a lease runs out.
Would you rather be able to talk to animals or speak every human language?
Why ask it
Follow up with the first conversation they'd have. A partner who picks animals mostly wants to hear what the cat really thinks of the two of you, so supply the cat's side yourself.
Would you rather relive the best day we've had so far or get a preview of the best day still to come?
Why ask it
Whichever they choose, ask which day they'd call the best so far. You may each name a different one, and hearing why theirs won is the reward.
Would you rather live in a house with a slide between floors or own a fridge that restocks itself?
Why ask it
Fun against convenience, and now you know which one your partner would pay for. Each of you adds one more impossible feature to the house, then you vote on the final floor plan.
Would you rather we were the best dancers at every wedding or the funniest table at every dinner party?
Why ask it
It asks which kind of attention your partner would enjoy sharing with you. If you split, the dancer owes one slow song at the next wedding and the comedian owes one story at the next dinner.
Would you rather be able to fly or turn invisible, knowing I get whichever power you turn down?
Why ask it
Handing the leftover power to your partner changes the math, because now they have to picture you invisible in the same house. Ask what the first week looks like, and who ends up doing the airport pickups.
Would you rather have to sing along to every song you hear or dance whenever music starts?
Why ask it
Picture the grocery store and the dentist's waiting room before choosing. Then put on a song and have each of you demonstrate your choice for one full chorus.
Would you rather wake up every day to breakfast already made or come home every day to a clean house?
Why ask it
The choice shows which kind of looking-after means most to your partner, being fed or being spared a job. You can act on the answer once this week without announcing why.
Would you rather have an extra hour every morning or an extra hour every night?
Why ask it
The real question is what the hour is for. Reading, running or simply sitting: whatever they say is what they feel short of lately, and you may be able to hand them some of it.
Would you rather we competed together on a baking show or a home renovation show?
Why ask it
Decide who talks to the camera and who gets caught muttering in the background. Bonus points for predicting the exact episode in which the two of you are sent home, and why.
Would you rather spend a day at my old high school with teenage me or have me spend a day at yours?
Why ask it
Each of you describes who the other would have met: the haircut, the lunch table, the band name on the binder. Then say honestly whether the two of you would have been friends back then.
What if
If I turned into a worm overnight, where in the house would you keep me?
Why ask it
The usual worm question stops at 'would you still love me'. Housing gets better answers: you find out whether you rate a terrarium with a view or a jar on the windowsill, and how often they'd remember to check the soil.
If we won the lottery tonight, who's the first person you'd tell, and who would never find out?
Why ask it
The spending daydream is much the same for everybody; the phone call is where it gets interesting. Compare your lists, then settle whether either of you would still turn up to work on Monday.
If we had to switch jobs for a week, which of us would get fired first?
Why ask it
Each of you describes the other's workday as you imagine it, and the real job holder corrects the record. It shows how much of what your partner does all day you've understood.
If we had to enter a talent show as a duo next week, what's our act?
Why ask it
The truthful answer is usually a talent one of you has while the other holds something. Decide who carries the act, then rehearse fifteen seconds of it right where you are.
If you could have one superpower that only worked inside our home, what would it be?
Why ask it
Confining it to the house turns flight into things like instant laundry or summoning the remote by thought. The pick is a fair guide to which daily task wears on them most.
If the two of us were stranded on a desert island and could each bring one thing, what's yours, and what do you bet I'd bring?
Why ask it
The bet is the fun part, since they have to predict you. Give one point for guessing your item and a second if the two items together would be any use: a hammock and a fishing rod is a plan, two hammocks is a vacation.
If you were handed a billboard on the busiest road in town, what would you put on it?
Why ask it
Some people go for a joke, some for advice, and a few just wish their mother a happy birthday. In the car, choose a real billboard as it goes by and rewrite that one together.
If you could master one skill overnight, what's the first thing you'd do with it?
Why ask it
Piano and languages come up a lot, but the second half matters more: impressing people, earning from it or enjoying it alone. A beginner's class in that skill is a present they would not see coming.
If aliens landed and asked the two of us to explain one human custom, which would be hardest to justify?
Why ask it
Small talk, neckties, clapping when the plane lands. Take turns playing the alien who keeps asking 'but why', which is harder to get through with a straight face than it sounds.
If you could add one room to our home with no limits, what's in it?
Why ask it
Once the rolling library ladder or the climbing wall has been described, ask for the budget version in the space you already have. A chair and a lamp go a long way.
If you had to give a twenty-minute talk with no preparation, what would the topic be?
Why ask it
Everybody has one subject they can go on about, and it isn't always the one you'd predict. Set a timer for two minutes, let them begin, and take your own turn straight afterwards.
If we could have dinner at any restaurant in the world tonight, travel included, where are we going?
Why ask it
The answer is as likely to be a taco stand from one trip years ago as anywhere with a waiting list. Write down the ones you could reach, since this is how date night ideas get found.
If you could trade places with a fictional character for a week, who would it be, and what would I be doing in that world?
Why ask it
The second half is what makes it a game for two, because they have to cast you as well. Sidekick, rival or innkeeper: each says a little about how they picture the pair of you.
If you had to name a new ice cream flavor after me, what's in it?
Why ask it
A flattering answer has a lot of chocolate; an accurate one has something salty and a surprise in the middle. Return the favor, then check whether any real shop sells something close.
If we could freeze time for everyone but us for one day, how would we spend it?
Why ask it
An empty amusement park says one thing and sleeping until noon in the quiet says another. Treat it as a reading of how tired you both are; neither answer is wrong.
If you could un-invent one thing, what goes?
Why ask it
Leaf blowers, group chats and alarm clocks are frequent choices. For a game, each of you argues for keeping the thing the other wants gone, and the better case wins the next pick of question.
Know me
What would I grab first if the fire alarm went off and everyone, pets included, was already safely outside?
Why ask it
Write your real answer down before they guess. A partner who says 'your phone' when the truth is a shoebox of photos has just learned something about you.
What's my dream vacation, and what would I refuse to do once we got there?
Why ask it
One point for the destination and one for the refusal, which is the harder half. A correct guess means they've been listening whenever you talk about travel.
What was my first job, and what did I hate about it?
Why ask it
Even couples with decades behind them can miss this one. A wrong guess carries a forfeit: sitting through the full story of the worst shift you ever worked.
Which movie have I seen more times than any other?
Why ask it
They get one guess, and you confirm it with a quote. A hit earns them a veto the next time you suggest watching it again.
What's the weirdest food combination I truly enjoy?
Why ask it
Anyone who has lived with you knows it and has been waiting for a chance to bring it up. Switch roles afterwards, and consider tasting each other's combination as the stakes.
When I was little, what did I tell everyone I was going to be?
Why ask it
A guess that is wrong but plausible is a compliment of its own: 'marine biologist' means they think you were a curious kid. Give the real answer, and say how long the ambition lasted.
What am I most likely to be late for, and what am I never late for?
Why ask it
Two halves, two points. The 'never late' half is the telling one, because it shows what your partner has noticed you truly care about.
If I could keep only one app on my phone, which one stays?
Why ask it
Easy to check, since the screen-time report keeps an honest record. Read each other's top three aloud if you're both feeling brave.
What's the last thing I do before I fall asleep?
Why ask it
Only somebody who shares your evenings would know whether it's checking the lock twice or reading two pages and dropping the book. That's why a right answer feels better than it should.
Which friend would I call first with good news, and which one with bad news?
Why ask it
Often two different people, and knowing both names means they've paid attention to your friendships. Newer couples can drop the scoring and simply tell each other.
What do I keep saying I'll get to this weekend that I never get to?
Why ask it
They'll name it instantly, whether it's the garage or the box of loose photos, which tells you how often you've announced it. Either do it together on Saturday or agree, out loud, that it's never happening and you can both stop mentioning it.
What's the best present anyone has ever given me?
Why ask it
It's useful when they get this one wrong. Your real answer shows what kind of gift lands with you, practical, sentimental or an outing, well ahead of the next birthday.
What can't I walk past in a store without stopping to look?
Why ask it
Your partner has stood waiting next to you often enough to know whether it's candles, notebooks or the clearance tools. A right answer earns them five unhurried minutes at their own weakness on the next errand, with no sighing from you.
What was the name of my first pet, and if I never had one, what did I beg for?
Why ask it
Childhood details make the hardest round, so couples in their first year should treat it as storytelling. Every wrong guess buys the other person two minutes on that pet, or on the campaign for the pony that never came.
What's on my bucket list that you think I'll really get around to?
Why ask it
It asks for a guess and a vote of confidence at once. If they choose something you've quietly given up on, ask why they still think you'll do it.
What's my signature dish, and what do I only think is my signature dish?
Why ask it
There's the meal you're known for and the one you're proud of, and they aren't always the same meal. Accept the verdict with grace, then deliver yours so the teasing runs both ways.
Road trip
Which three songs have to be on the playlist for this drive, and which one are you banning?
Why ask it
Add one song each in turn so nobody runs the speakers for an hour. Learn the banned song and honor the ban at least until the first stop.
What's the best road trip snack, and what is not allowed in this car?
Why ask it
Settle it before the first gas station and not in the aisle. For a game, each of you buys the other one snack in secret, and you score the choices once you're back in your seats.
What's the strangest town name or road sign we've passed so far, and what do you think happened there?
Why ask it
A running game for the long stretches: invent the founding story of the next odd town name you see. The passenger keeps score and the driver is allowed one appeal.
What was your first car, or the first one you remember riding in, and what was wrong with it?
Why ask it
Every first car had a flaw its owner can still describe: a door that only opened from the outside, a tape stuck in the deck. Ask what was usually playing in it and who rode in the passenger seat.
What's the best trip you took as a kid, and where did you sit in the car?
Why ask it
The seat unlocks everything else: the middle hump, the rear-facing back row, a sibling's elbow. A long drive has no time limit on stories, so let this one run.
Who's the better navigator, and who's the better DJ?
Why ask it
Hand out the jobs officially for the remainder of the trip according to the verdict. Reopen the case after the first missed exit or the third slow song in a row.
If this car had a name, what would it be?
Why ask it
A car with a name gets forgiven more easily when it makes a strange noise. If you can't agree, it answers to both names until one of them sticks.
What would the people in the next car guess about us just from looking?
Why ask it
Turn it around and make up lives for the people you pass: where the couple in the convertible is going and what they just disagreed about. An hour of interstate goes by quickly this way.
What's the first thing you want to do when we get there?
Why ask it
A planning question in disguise. One of you wants a shower and a nap while the other wants to head straight out, and mile fifty is a better place to learn that than the hotel lobby.
Which roadside attraction would you actually pull over for?
Why ask it
The world's largest anything, a pie stand, a cave tour with a hand-painted sign. Give each traveler one stop per trip that can't be vetoed, and this tells you how they'll spend it.
What's the most embarrassing thing that ever happened to you that you can finally laugh about?
Why ask it
A stretch of highway suits this one, because the teller gets to look at the road and not at you. Offer yours first if your spouse or partner hesitates, and agree that the story stays in the car.
What do you only ever eat or drink on road trips?
Why ask it
These small rituals are worth learning. Come back from the register with their particular gas station coffee, or the candy nobody buys at home, and you've won the morning.
If we kept driving past where we're headed, how far would we get before one of us wanted to turn around?
Why ask it
You find out who has the wanderlust and who misses their own bed by day four. Ask what finally turns them back: the dog, work, or running out of clean socks.
What's the best thing we've seen out the window today?
Why ask it
Save it for the last hour, when you're both worn out. It gives a long day in a seat a highlight, and people nearly always have one ready.
I'm thinking of a place we've been together: can you get it in twenty yes-or-no questions?
Why ask it
No hands and no screen needed, so the driver can play. Places beat objects here because each wrong guess drags up another trip you'd half forgotten.
What rule should this car have that it doesn't have yet?
Why ask it
Driver sets the temperature, passenger handles snacks, nobody comments on anyone's merging. Two rules each, agreed out loud, head off the usual squabbles of a long drive.
Memories and plans
What's your favorite memory of us that nobody else knows about?
Why ask it
No photos and no witnesses, so the two of you are its only keepers. You may each hold a different private favorite, and telling yours is how the other gets to keep it too.
What was going through your head in the ten minutes before our first date?
Why ask it
You'll hear about the outfit changed twice, the rehearsed opening line or the lap around the block to avoid arriving early. Trade accounts: neither of you had any idea what state the other was in.
What's the first meal we ever cooked together, and how did it turn out?
Why ask it
If neither of you can remember, settle on the earliest one you can. Then compare it with how you cook together now: who has taken over the stove, and which dish quietly left the rotation.
Remember the first time we got truly lost? Whose fault was it, really?
Why ask it
You will disagree, and that's the fun of it. Let each person tell the whole of their version before any rebuttal, and accept that the facts are gone for good.
What song takes you straight back to when we first got together?
Why ask it
Play it if you can, because the song does more than a description of it. Two different songs are the start of a playlist to bring out every anniversary.
What did we use to do all the time that we should bring back?
Why ask it
An old habit is easier to restart than a new one is to begin. Whether it's the late walks or the Sunday diner, put a date on the calendar before you move along.
What's the funniest thing that has ever happened to us in public?
Why ask it
Tell it as if to somebody who wasn't there, with every detail. Whoever tells it better has just been given the job for all future dinner parties.
Which vacation or day trip of ours would you repeat exactly, and what's the one thing you'd change?
Why ask it
The one change is the valuable part: the hotel, the shoes, the day lost to driving. Bring it up again when you plan the next trip so the same mistake isn't made twice.
What's the oldest photo of the two of us you can find on your phone right now?
Why ask it
A question that comes with a prop. Scroll back together and expect to lose twenty minutes to old haircuts, former apartments and people you no longer see.
What's the most spontaneous thing we've ever done?
Why ask it
For one couple it's a flight booked at midnight, for another it's ice cream before dinner. If an example is slow to come, take the hint and do something unplanned this weekend.
What's one place within two hours of home that we still haven't been to?
Why ask it
Close enough for a Saturday, which is why this one leads to real outings. Each of you names a place, and the nearer of the two goes first.
Which trip do we keep talking about and never book, and what's really stopping us?
Why ask it
Naming the true obstacle, whether that's money, time off or who watches the dog, is the first step. Sometimes it turns out smaller than it looked from a distance.
What's your idea of the perfect date night at home?
Why ask it
Press for specifics: the food, the lighting, what's playing, when the phones go away. You'll walk off with a complete plan you already know your significant other will like.
Which holiday or birthday should we celebrate completely differently next time?
Why ask it
Somebody is often tired of how one occasion goes and too polite to mention it. Sketch the opposite version together: away if it's always at home, tiny if it's always big.
What ridiculous goal could we set as a couple for the next twelve months?
Why ask it
Try every dumpling place in town, finish one jigsaw puzzle a month, learn a card trick each. A silly goal has a better chance than a serious one because nobody dreads it.
What should we say yes to this year that we'd normally talk ourselves out of?
Why ask it
Think of the invitations you usually decline: the dance class, the camping trip, hosting the holiday. Pick one each, and agree that the other person can't back out once it's on the calendar.
What do you hope we're doing on an ordinary Tuesday ten years from now?
Why ask it
Ordinary days are easier to picture than milestones, and they say more. Catch the small details, like a garden, a dog or a shorter commute, because those are the real wishes.
What have you always wanted to try that I would never guess?
Why ask it
Guess first anyway, and be wrong on purpose if that's funnier. A partner who admits to wanting a trapeze lesson has just told you what to arrange for their next birthday.
When we're old, what will the two of us be known for around the neighborhood?
Why ask it
Start with the joke answers, like the porch with too many wind chimes. Under them you'll hear what each of you hopes will last.
How to make a game of it, at dinner or on the road
Practical guidance for the conversation itself
Which group for which occasion
Date night
Start with three or four from Quick while you wait for the food, then move to Would you rather or What if once you've both loosened up. Bring a short list and not the whole page: five questions that turn into stories will fill a dinner. Memories and plans suits dessert or the walk home, when nobody is in a hurry.
A road trip with your spouse or partner
The Road trip group was written to be heard and not read: the passenger asks, the driver answers, and the only things anyone has to look at are the signs going past. Would you rather and What if also survive road noise. Two questions need the car stopped: the oldest photo, which takes a phone, and the secret snack purchase, which takes a gas station.
Cooking dinner or doing chores
Quick and Know me fit the gaps between stirring and chopping, since most take under a minute. Ask one, answer it yourself, go back to the onions. The cook-or-clean question is best asked while one of you is standing at the sink.
A long wait
Airport gates, waiting rooms and slow lines are What if territory: the answers run long, and nobody nearby minds overhearing a debate about leaf blowers. Leave the Know me quiz for home, where a wrong guess about your first job isn't delivered in front of strangers.
Four games built for a couple
Three courses
Before a dinner out, each of you picks three questions for the other: a starter from Quick, a main from What if or Would you rather, and a dessert from Memories and plans. Ask the starter when the drinks arrive and hold the dessert until the plates are cleared. Six questions is the whole game, and the three you chose tell your partner what you were curious about.
The next red truck
On a long drive the list runs out sooner than the road does. Before you set off, agree on a trigger, such as a red truck, a water tower or a state line, and nobody may ask the next question until one goes by. The wait gives each answer room to wander, and the quiet stretches of highway become part of the game.
Place a bet
For Know me, the guesser stakes one, two or three points on a guess before hearing the truth, and loses the stake when wrong. The confident misses are the entertaining ones: three points gone on a first job you never had. Play five questions each way, and the lower score buys the coffee.
Two versions
For the remember-when questions, each of you tells the same memory in turn, and the listener may not correct anything until the end. Then count the differences: the month, the weather, whose idea it was. No ruling is needed. A couple with two versions of the day they got lost has two stories where there used to be one.
Fitting it to the two of you
A few months in
Lean on Quick, Would you rather and What if, which need no shared history. Treat Know me as a way of finding things out, with no score kept, and leave the remember-when half of the last group until there is more to remember.
Years in, or married
Couples with a decade behind them get the most from Know me and Memories and plans, where the surprise is how much there still is to learn about a spouse you could describe in your sleep. Go slowly with the first job, the first pet and the first date: a story that has been told for years usually has a detail in it that never was.
When one of you isn't a games person
Drop the scoring and the announcement. One What if asked while the pasta boils is a conversation; 'I found a list of questions' is homework. Give your own answer first, so that it reads as an offer and not a quiz.
Keep what's worth keeping
Several notes point at something to use later: the meal to recreate, the tiny thing that would make tomorrow better, the place two hours from home, the thing your significant other has always wanted to try. Write those down the same day, somewhere you'll both see them. A fun question is better still when it comes back three weeks later as a plan.
When a light question lands heavily
A first pet, a childhood car trip or the song from when you first got together can bring up someone who isn't around any more. If an answer goes quiet, stay with it and let the list wait. The silly ones keep.