Questions to Ask Kids About the 90s
Questions that get children guessing at how daily life worked in the 1990s, built for a two-way conversation between kids and the adults who were there.
The questions
Open any question for the note
How do you think we watched a show if we missed it?
Why ask it
Children reach for streaming first and then run out of options, which is the moment the conversation gets interesting. The real answer, wait months for a repeat or set a machine to record it, is genuinely hard to imagine from here.
What would you do if you wanted to know something and there was no internet in the house?
Why ask it
Watch how long it takes them to arrive at asking a person or opening a book. Most children guess a library eventually, and few think of the encyclopedia set that sat unread in half the living rooms of the decade.
How do you think we arranged to meet up without any phones?
Why ask it
This one usually stumps them completely. The answer involves fixing a time days in advance and turning up, which introduces the idea of a plan that cannot be adjusted, something modern childhood has no equivalent for.
If I handed you a cassette tape, what would you try to do with it?
Why ask it
Better with the object in your hand. Children have often seen one in a film without knowing which way it goes in. Explaining that you had to wind it back to hear a song again lands harder than any general point about convenience.
What do you think happened if you took twenty-four photographs and they all came out badly?
Why ask it
A roll of film held twenty-four or thirty-six shots, you paid to have them developed, and you found out days later. The idea that a photograph could be lost forever, unseen, is the part children find hardest to believe.
How do you think we found an address in a town we had never been to?
Why ask it
Paper maps, written directions, and stopping to ask strangers. Ask what they think happened when the directions were wrong, since being properly lost is now an unusual experience for a child.
If your favorite song came on the radio, how would you keep it?
Why ask it
The answer, recording it onto tape and hoping the DJ stopped talking in time, sounds absurd until you explain it. It also introduces the idea that you did not choose what you listened to, which is genuinely foreign now.
What do you think a video rental shop was like on a Friday night?
Why ask it
Children enjoy the mechanics: shelves of boxes, one copy of the popular film, someone else already having it, a fine if you were late back. Describe the empty shelf and let them work out what it meant.
What would be the worst thing about a telephone that stayed in one room?
Why ask it
They will get to the lack of privacy quickly. What they usually miss is that the whole household could hear the call, and that anybody could pick up another handset, which shaped what teenagers were able to say at all.
How long do you think it took for a single picture to appear on a computer screen?
Why ask it
Slow enough to walk away from, and the connection tied up the telephone line while it happened. If you can find a recording of a dial-up modem connecting, play it; the sound does more than the explanation.
What do you think brothers and sisters argued about back then?
Why ask it
One television, one telephone line, one games console between everyone. Scarcity of devices is a concept children have to reconstruct, and it explains a lot about how families of the era actually behaved.
What do you think children did after school when there was nothing on?
Why ask it
Television schedules ran children's shows for a fixed couple of hours and then stopped. The answer to what filled the rest is usually outside, and it makes a better argument for unstructured time than any lecture would.
Which of your things would look like magic to a child in 1995?
Why ask it
Reverses the direction, which children enjoy more than being told about the past. Expect a phone, and push for what specifically about it: the camera, the maps, the fact that everyone you know is in your pocket.
What would you miss most if you woke up in 1995?
Why ask it
The first answer is always the internet. The second answer is the useful one, and it is often something narrow like being able to look up a word, message one person privately, or find out what happened in a match immediately.
What do you think you would like better about living back then?
Why ask it
Children often name being unreachable, or nobody having a camera. That is worth taking seriously rather than treating as a novelty, because it is a real observation about their own lives.
What would you want to ask a child your age from 1995?
Why ask it
Turns them from audience into interviewer and their questions are usually sharper than yours: how did you know if someone liked you, what did you do when you were bored, were you scared of anything different.
What do you think grown-ups get wrong when they say things were better then?
Why ask it
Gives them room to push back, and their reply is often fair: that people forget the boredom, the waiting, and who was left out. A good test of whether you are having a conversation or delivering a lecture.
Which one thing from the 90s would you actually want back?
Why ask it
The limit of one forces a choice rather than a list. Answers are frequently about a mechanism rather than an object: not being contactable, having to wait for something, keeping photographs on paper.
What do you think will look ridiculous about right now in thirty years?
Why ask it
The best question in the set, because it puts them in the position adults are in when they talk about the 90s. Children are usually more willing to imagine their own things looking silly than adults are.
What from now do you hope still exists in thirty years?
Why ask it
A closing question that ends forward rather than backward. Note the answer down; it is the one you will both want to check in a decade.
Making This a Conversation Rather Than a Lecture
Practical guidance for the conversation itself
Bring objects if you can
- A cassette or video tape, a disposable camera, a paper map, a phone with a cord, a printed photograph with the date stamped in the corner. Objects generate questions that abstract ones do not.
- Play a recording of a dial-up modem connecting. It explains the pace of the decade in eight seconds.
- Show them a photograph of your own bedroom or your school if you have one. The clothes and the clutter do more work than any description.
- If you have no objects, use their phone: ask them to name every separate device it has replaced and count them.
Keep it two-way
Let them guess before you answer
The guessing is the entertaining part, and a wrong guess is a better opening than a correct one. Resist filling the pause with the answer.
Answer their questions properly
When they ask you something back, give a real story with names and details rather than a summary of the era. Specific beats general with every age group.
Include what was worse
Waiting, boredom, having no way to reach anyone, and far less tolerance for children who did not fit in. A one-sided account of the decade is the fastest way to lose their interest.
What lands at different ages
- Under eight: physical objects and mechanics. Winding a tape, using a rotary dial, and film that runs out are the ideas that work.
- Nine to twelve: scarcity and logistics. One television, one phone line, and not being able to look anything up are genuinely fascinating at this age.
- Teenagers: social questions. How you met people, how you knew what was popular, and what happened when you could not be contacted are the ones they engage with.
- Any age: the reversal questions, about what would look ridiculous now, work better than anything about the past.
Common pitfalls
Turning it into a comparison of childhoods
Any hint that they have it easy ends the conversation. The interesting question is how things worked, not who had it better.
Assuming they know the references
Band names, show titles, and commercials mean nothing without context. Describe what the thing was for, then name it.
Answering your own question
The temptation to explain is strong because you were there. Ask, wait, and let the wrong guess stand for a moment.