Christian Dating Questions to Ask Before Marriage
Essential questions to explore faith, values, and spiritual compatibility before making the lifelong commitment of Christian marriage.
1How would you describe your relationship with God and how has it evolved?
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How would you describe your relationship with God and how has it evolved?
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Why this works
Reveals the depth of their faith and spiritual journey, providing insight into their personal relationship with God and spiritual maturity.
2What role do you envision God playing in our marriage and family life?
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What role do you envision God playing in our marriage and family life?
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Why this works
Explores how they see God's presence in daily life and reveals their understanding of spiritual leadership and partnership in marriage.
3How do you practice your faith on a daily basis and what spiritual disciplines are important to you?
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How do you practice your faith on a daily basis and what spiritual disciplines are important to you?
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Why this works
Shows practical faith application and reveals spiritual habits that will influence daily life and family spiritual practices.
4What are your thoughts on prayer as a couple and how do you envision praying together?
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What are your thoughts on prayer as a couple and how do you envision praying together?
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Why this works
Explores expectations about spiritual intimacy and reveals their understanding of prayer as a foundation for marital connection.
5How do you handle spiritual struggles or times when you feel distant from God?
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How do you handle spiritual struggles or times when you feel distant from God?
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Why this works
Reveals their approach to spiritual challenges and shows how they maintain faith during difficult periods, which is crucial for marital support.
6What are your thoughts on church involvement and how do you see us serving together?
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What are your thoughts on church involvement and how do you see us serving together?
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Why this works
Explores expectations about church community and reveals their vision for shared ministry and service as a couple.
7How do you envision raising children in the faith and what spiritual values are most important to you?
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How do you envision raising children in the faith and what spiritual values are most important to you?
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Why this works
Reveals parenting philosophy and spiritual priorities that will guide family decisions and children's spiritual development.
8What are your thoughts on biblical roles in marriage and how do you see us complementing each other?
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What are your thoughts on biblical roles in marriage and how do you see us complementing each other?
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Why this works
Explores understanding of biblical marriage principles and reveals expectations about roles and responsibilities in the relationship.
9How do you handle disagreements about spiritual matters or biblical interpretation?
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How do you handle disagreements about spiritual matters or biblical interpretation?
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Why this works
Shows approach to spiritual differences and reveals their ability to maintain unity while respecting different perspectives on faith.
10What are your thoughts on tithing and financial stewardship as a couple?
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What are your thoughts on tithing and financial stewardship as a couple?
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Why this works
Explores financial values and reveals their understanding of biblical principles about money and generosity in marriage.
11How do you envision maintaining spiritual intimacy and connection in our marriage?
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How do you envision maintaining spiritual intimacy and connection in our marriage?
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Why this works
Reveals their understanding of spiritual connection in marriage and shows how they plan to maintain faith-centered intimacy.
12What are your thoughts on forgiveness and how do you handle conflict from a biblical perspective?
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What are your thoughts on forgiveness and how do you handle conflict from a biblical perspective?
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Why this works
Shows understanding of biblical forgiveness and reveals their approach to conflict resolution based on Christian principles.
13How do you see us supporting each other's spiritual growth and calling?
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How do you see us supporting each other's spiritual growth and calling?
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Why this works
Explores commitment to mutual spiritual development and reveals their understanding of supporting each other's God-given purposes.
14What are your thoughts on biblical boundaries in relationships and how do you maintain purity?
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What are your thoughts on biblical boundaries in relationships and how do you maintain purity?
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Why this works
Reveals their understanding of biblical relationship principles and shows their commitment to maintaining godly standards in dating and marriage.
15How do you handle spiritual leadership and what does that look like to you?
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How do you handle spiritual leadership and what does that look like to you?
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Why this works
Explores understanding of spiritual leadership roles and reveals their approach to leading and following in spiritual matters.
16What are your thoughts on biblical submission and how do you understand it in the context of marriage?
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What are your thoughts on biblical submission and how do you understand it in the context of marriage?
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Why this works
Reveals their understanding of biblical marriage principles and shows their approach to mutual respect and partnership in marriage.
17How do you envision handling spiritual differences with extended family or friends?
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How do you envision handling spiritual differences with extended family or friends?
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Why this works
Shows approach to maintaining faith while respecting others' beliefs and reveals their ability to navigate spiritual differences in relationships.
18What are your thoughts on biblical counseling and how do you see us seeking help when needed?
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What are your thoughts on biblical counseling and how do you see us seeking help when needed?
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Why this works
Reveals their openness to spiritual guidance and shows their understanding of the importance of seeking wise counsel in marriage.
19How do you envision our marriage being a witness to others and what does that mean to you?
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How do you envision our marriage being a witness to others and what does that mean to you?
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Why this works
Explores their vision for marriage as ministry and reveals their understanding of how marriage can reflect God's love to others.
20What are your thoughts on biblical love and how do you understand loving each other as Christ loves the church?
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What are your thoughts on biblical love and how do you understand loving each other as Christ loves the church?
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Why this works
Reveals their understanding of biblical love principles and shows their commitment to loving sacrificially and unconditionally in marriage.
Best Practices for Christian Dating Conversations
Expert tips and techniques for getting the most out of these questions.
Best Practices
Pray Together Before and After Conversations
Begin and end important discussions with prayer, inviting God's wisdom and guidance into your relationship decisions.
Study Scripture Together
Read and discuss relevant Bible passages about marriage, love, and relationships to ensure your understanding is grounded in biblical truth.
Seek Wise Counsel
Involve trusted spiritual mentors, pastors, or Christian counselors who can provide biblical guidance and wisdom for your relationship.
Question Sequences
The Faith Foundation Sequence
The Marriage Vision Sequence
Common Pitfalls
Don't Assume Shared Beliefs
Even within Christianity, there are different denominations and interpretations. Discuss specific beliefs and practices to ensure compatibility.
Don't Rush Spiritual Intimacy
While spiritual connection is important, maintain appropriate boundaries and avoid using spiritual intimacy as a substitute for emotional or physical boundaries.
Don't Ignore Practical Matters
While spiritual compatibility is crucial, also discuss practical aspects of marriage like finances, career goals, and family planning.